


Working with what we got.

by naturegirlrocks



Series: Working with what we got [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Asexual Character, Beware or strange logic, But he's not good at the consequences, F/M, Gen, Loki brings gifts, Loki may be hurt but he's no pushover, M/M, More relationships as story develops, Tony is good a lying
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-27
Updated: 2015-07-12
Packaged: 2018-03-15 12:29:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 58,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3447233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/naturegirlrocks/pseuds/naturegirlrocks
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki needs protection. How do you get your enemies to protect you? You bring gifts!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Unexpected

**Author's Note:**

> Crappy summary, I know, but honestly I'm up over 35000 words on this thing and I have no clue were it's going. 
> 
> Will update this on Fridays. Chapters are of various lengths. I'm doing this slowly because I want a buffert and not stress.

"Again!" Natasha hit her fist on the kitchen-isle-slash-breakfast-counter. "I need more cranberry juice! I'm going to pee and we are doing it again!"

Bruce, Steve, Clint, and Tony stood by as their only female teammate had a mental breakdown. Tony nudged Bruce with his elbow. Bruce shook his head, even the other guy seemed nervous. They looked to Steve who seemed to be on the level of Natasha in freaking out, although internally. Clint had just been frozen for the last quarter of an hour. Tony sighed, it was apparently up to him to man up and take the horns of this particular beast. 

"Nat," he said in the fake bravado calm he was so famous for. "You have tried twelve different tests, and Bruce did the hormone analyse three times. Face it. You are pregnant."

"No I'm not!" she yelled back, her fists clenched and her eyes flashing with rage. "We need to do it again!"

"Well, you drunk all the juice. You are going to give yourself an ulcer, and then were would the baby be?"

"Babies are not inside the stomach sack, you idiot!" Nat gave him a push that made him fall back on Steve. "And I'm not pregnant."

"If I may, Miss Romanoff," interrupted JARVIS politely. "I have scanned you, and taken your heat signature, and you are."

One of the holographic computer screens by the counter lit up at showed a small 3D image of Natasha in a varied range of colours, the red and orange ones were heavy in her abdomen. Clint gave a small squeak that made Bruce look at him worriedly. 

"But I can't be..." Nat breathed, supporting herself on the counter staring at the image. "I can't."

"Eeh," said Steve and shifted in a uncomfortable way. "Congratulations?"

"Shut up," hissed Tony.

"Isn't that what you are supposed to say?"

"Not when she's upset," he frowned. "At least I don't think so... Nat, do you want to be congratulated?"

"Fuck off," she sat down on the kitchen floor with her head between her knees and arms over her head. 

"It doesn't seem that way," Tony shook his head. "Man, I need a drink. Clint, you talk to her."

Clint shook awake from his small blackout and stared panicky at his friend. 

"What me?" his voice had a high pitch to it. "Why me?"

"Because..." Tony rolled his eyes and pushed the archer forwards "...it's obviously you who put her in this position, so take some responsibility for your actions."

That thankfully seemed to shake Clint into some sense and made him carefully approach Natasha. He slowly sat down on his haunches and, only after a slight hesitation, he reached out to pat her on the shoulder. 

"Hey, sweetie?" he asked. "Are you okay?"

"Don't call me 'sweetie'," Nat breathed hard. "And no I'm not okay. I'm pregnant."

The next moment she moved so that the was leaning against him. Clint took it as a sign to put his arms around her. He pleadingly glanced up at his three friends looking down at them. Tony sighed and sat down on the floor too. Bruce and Steve followed. The tension in the room seemed to loosen a bit. 

Tony leaned against the fridge, it had been a long morning. One starting with Nat nearly fainting and then several hasty runs in disguise to different pharmacies and grocery stores. Then the nerve wrecking waiting and the subsequent yelling had began. There hadn't been time for breakfast, and his stomach was growling. Still, propriety told Tony not to fix himself some toast until Nat seemed at least a bit more stable. 

"Nat," Bruce adjusted his glasses and made a sad grimace. "I... I have read your medical file, and I know you were hurt. But it doesn't have to be that bad?"

"Is this abut the gunshot wound you showed me?" asked Steve with a slight flush on his face.

"You showed him your gunshot wound?" asked Tony in a fake whining tone. "You never showed it to me! I want to see that!"

"Shut up, Stark," Nat rolled her eyes, half a smile playing in the corner of her mouth. 

"You shut up," bantered Tony. "I let you put your hand inside my chest when we changed the arc-reactor casing, the least you could do in return is to show me the gunshot wound on your belly."

Nat almost laughed, which made Clint brave enough to run a hand through her hair. She exhaled and leaned against Clint's chest. She seemed calmed down. 

"It's not just the gunshot," she sighed. "That did give me some internal scar tissue, but the damage there had mostly been done..." Again she took a breath. "They sterilised all of us when we were picked for training. In Russia. I was eleven. You can't be an assassin if you risk being pregnant, especially if you need to get close to your targets. This shouldn't be possible."

They sat quietly for a moment reflecting her words. Tony was quite angry, and it seemed he wasn't the only one since Bruce looked a little green around the edges. Steve had already noticed and was patting circles on Bruce's back. 

"I probably won't be able to carry it full term," Nat placed a hand on her abdomen. "There is too much damage. Perhaps it better to just have it removed."

"If that's what you want to do," said Clint giving her a sad smile. 

"We are behind you what ever you do," Tony reached out to her and she took his hand. "Either way you decide, I'm paying for the best doctors money can find."

Bruce and Steve put their hands on theirs as well. 

"Thank you," Natasha smiled. 

There was a hint of a tear in her eye but nobody mentioned it for fear of their lives. 

"Now then," Tony rubbed his hands together. "I think this calls for a brunch. If I'm starving, think of poor Cap with his crazy metabolism, he can't live in patriotism alone. Who wants waffles? Or better yet, who can make waffles? Because I can't. Bruce?"

"I'm on it," laughed Bruce and got to his feet, Steve followed him to help. 

"You two stay there," said Tony to Clint and Natasha as he rose. "I'll just call someone in the lobby to go buy some more juice, somehow we are out."

"Yeah," Nat sighed. "Sorry about that. I really need to pee now."

"Too much information," Tony winked. "And I wouldn't mind you cleaning away your little white sticks here either. Honestly, girls and their clattering."

As he walked towards the intercom by the elevator there was the sudden sound of thunder from outside. Tony checked and the sky was as clear and sunny as the late morning of autumn day in New York could be. 

"Thor seems to be back early from New Mexico, better order some boxes of pop-tarts as well."

\----------

"Why are we not celebrating?" Thor asked when he had found out the news. "Is it because she is unwed? I have heard that being called a single mother on Midgard isn't as bad as anymore."

"She's not going to be a single mother," protested Clint with his mouth half-full of waffle. "I'm with her!"

They had all gathered around the kitchen-isle-slash-breakfast-counter. Waffles and condiments were on plates, as well as toast, pop tarts, and bacon. 

"So much more reason to bathe you in a tub of mead," Thor smiled. "Then we shall drink toasts to fertility and serenade the mother."

"Is that how you do it on Asgard?" Tony looked up from his reverent waiting of the coffeemaker. "That actually sounds fun."

"Yes," Nat rolled her eyes. "I want to be screamed of tone to by drunken idiots."

"And it's it's not even eleven a clock," reminded Steve. 

"Also," Nat looked down on the untouched waffle on her plate. "I'm not sure I'm going to keep it."

A sad uncomfortable gloom settled over the kitchen. It was only broken by the coffeemaker beeping awkwardly. Tony lifted away the pot, but again he felt propriety telling him not to pour it any of the liquid in his cup. It was hard living with other people. 

"What do you mean?" Thor seemed a bit panicked. "Don't you want the child?"

Natasha took a breath, again her eyes seemed a bit too moist to mention. All the men, except for Thor, felt uncomfortable. Tony stared at his empty cup. Bruce poked his waffle with his fork.

"I want to keep it," Nat explained, her voice was hard and lacking of emotion, but that was just a coping mechanism even though it broke as she continued speaking. "I want to keep it so much, but my body probably won't be able to carry it. There's a lot of damage in there, Thor..."

A tear escaped her right eye, but Clint caught it with his thumb before it ran down her cheek. 

"What if..." Thor took a breath, turning his eyes away from everyone in the room towards his hands. "What if I can guarantee you that it will be fine?" 

The guilty tone in Thor's voice made Tony botch his hopefully, up until then, very sneaky pouring of coffee behind his back. He had only managed to fill half the cup and now he had burned himself. Nobody seemed to noticed though. Bruce cleared his throat, a hint of anger in his tone. 

"Please tell me you are offering her some kind of Asgardian prenatal care... Because if you say the L-word..."

"Damn," Thor shifted nervously, that wasn't a good sign. 

"Thor..." Nat was clenching her fists. "At this point I really, really hope you are implying that Loki is some kind of a midwife, and not that he put this inside me."

The silence was speaking a multitude of words. Tony swallowed down his coffee with out tasting it. Bruce started doing heavy breathing exercises. Steve looked like he was going to punch someone, though not as much as Natasha and Clint. 

"Where is he?" Nat bit out.

"You must understand," Thor looked a bit more panicked, most likely not a familiar feeling for the god of thunder. "I thought he was dead... He's trying to redeem himself."

"Where. Is. He." Nat wasn't kidding around. 

"With Lady Jane," Thor rubbed his face. "I was just there before. He asked me to go here to see how his gifts were getting received."

"Now hold on," Tony walked across the kitchen. "'Gifts'? The baby is a gift? From Loki? Why? And plural? What other gifts have we gotten?"

"I'm not sure..." Thor cleared his throat and glanced over at Bruce who had had to lay down on the floor. "That's partly why I'm here..."

"Get him," said Clint. "You get him here now or I will get my bow and beat you to a bloody pulp with it."

"I don't think you can..."

"Now!" screamed Nat

At that moment the Hulk erupted, but he wasn't close to the scariest thing in the room. 

He was distraction though and forced Clint to make a choice to drag Nat out of the room to protect her from potential fallout. She resentfully complied. Steve immediately took on the role of damage controller, or more accurately put: 'green angry monster distraction'. 

Tony took hold of Thor's arm, dragged him into the adjacent room, and handed him his phone.

"Call him, and get him over here," he said. "And you better be right about the redeeming part, because if you are not then nothing can save him."


	2. Moment of Clarity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki explains part of his purpose and Tony has a realisation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter one day early, how I spoil you ;)

Loki arrived by teleportation. 

It was disconcerting for his unwilling hosts to have him suddenly appear in the middle of their common living room, and quite taxing for himself, but there had been an element of emergency. Not that he hadn't expected Thor to mess it up, but Loki had still figured he would have a bit more time to travel across an entire continent. He was still able to duck the arrow coming at his head before he collapsed to catch his breath. 

The missed arrow imbedded itself in the wall opposite, which made Stark groan in outrage. 

"Fucking hell! I just had this place renovated!"

"He moved," grunted Barton after the captain wrestled had away the bow from him.

"Well good for you he did," said Stark. "Because I want some fucking answers."

"Get in line," said Romanoff stepping up to Loki who was breathing hard on the plush carpet. "What the fuck did you do to me? Answer or I'll kick your face in."

"So violent for a mother to be," Loki smiled up at her. 

Romanoff did deliver the kick then, but Loki easily held up his hand to block it. He let her fall backwards on one of the sofas before getting to his feet. 

Stark raised an eyebrow at him. 

"Changed your tailors, did you Reindeer?" 

"Oh this," Loki looked down on himself, the blue trousers and the white shirt. "The Maiden Darcy picked it out. She said it was very inconspicuous. It's good for anonymity, but I do miss the feel of leather sometimes."

Stark laughed, his friends were glaring at him. 

"Alright," Stark cleared his throat. "What are you up to?"

"I'm sure Thor already told you," Loki glanced at his once-brother who seemed uncomfortable to be implicated in the conversation. "I'm for redemption. I want to make amends for what I did, even though I state for the record that I did it under great coercion and it wasn't entirely my fault..."

"Loki," Thor sighed. 

"Very well, it's a subject for another time," Loki smiled complacently, even though he felt a bit irritated. "As I was saying, redemption and apologising. And what better way to do both than by baring gifts? One for each of you, and hopefully it will begin to place me in your good graces."

"It sounds more to me like you expect our guilt and gratitude," said Banner who thankfully stayed close to the door for an easy exit. 

"I do not decide how you react to gifts, Doctor," Loki continued smiling. "Believe me when I say that I don't expect anything in return, except maybe a chance to speak for my cause."

"Said by the god of lies."

"A gift?" Romanoff spat, getting to her feet again. "Why would I accept a gift from you?"

"Shall I take it back? It is too early to call it a life, there would be nothing wrong with your request."

"I..." She hesitated, but then seemed to come to a conclusion. "Is it mine?"

Loki knew he had her then. 

"You are still capable of producing the seed of a child, my lady. I merely gave the seed a more fertile ground. If it makes you feel better..." Loki bowed his head "...I will not consider your gift properly received until the child is born. That will make it my responsibility to keep it healthy through the pregnancy."

"That does sound like a good offer," said Stark. "But that also means s you are going to stay around for nine months, and we have to protect you during that time."

"Everything has consequences. Though all this is the lady's choice."

"That's extortion," Barton growled. "I'm more interested in what else is in this for you. I don't believe your bull about redemption, and that you are feeling sorry. You have been inside my head, I know how you work."

"Yes," agreed Rogers. "If you were really sorry you should first apologise to New York for those you killed and injured and not to us." 

"And how, dear Captain, would such an apology be accepted by the city? They are millions of people out there. Would they hear me out? Would they understand the forces that made me do what I did? What should I give them? I can't give then their loved ones back, nor can I heal them all, nor singlehandedly rebuild all the damages. I will do far better redeeming myself with you, and hope for you to give the benefit of a doubt as an inspiration when I later face them."

The Avengers looked at each other for a moment of shocked silence. Loki was amused by their short confusion.

"You are too eloquent for your own good," said Stark with a slow shake of his head. "Let's just say for a moment that we accept this, Thor implied that you already given out your other gifts. But since only Nat is pregnant I really want to know what they are." 

"I have indeed dispersed several gifts already, though I have three left to give. One for the good captain, one for the doctor, and one for you, Stark." 

"So you saved the best to last?" 

"Not likely," Loki smirked. "Your gifts are close proximity spells. While my other gifts have healed the bodies of the receivers, you three have no bodily problems that need healing."

"What do you mean?" Stark frowned. "I have a big hole in my chest."

"Do you wish me to remove it?"

"No!" Stark placed his hand protectively over the light imbedded in his chest. "No touching."

Loki gracefully bowed his head again. He was feeling more confident by the moment, though he knew the importance of not showing it. Overconfidence wasn't a trait supporting his cause. 

"Hold on," Romanoff grabbed hold of his arm. "I haven't made my decision yet. And what about Clint? What did you give him? Don't say the baby because that is lazy and I was going to share it with him anyway."

"Of course," Loki turned to Barton. "Your archer has been sleeping more easier lately hasn't he? Less nightmares? Better moods? No longer so easily distracted by dark thoughts?"

"Yes?" Barton scratched the back of his neck. "The headaches are gone as well. You did that?"

"To the best of my ability." 

"Huh, I just thought the therapy was finally working." Barton narrowed his eyes. "Though since it was you that put those things in my head in the first place, I don't know if I consider it a gift that to taken it away."

"Do you want it back?"

"Alright," Banner stepped forward. "We get your point. Though I agree with Clint with this being extortion. That's why you wanted to keep it a secret, so we couldn't refuse them before you threaten to take them away."

"I see no reason to defend my choices since you have already formed your opinion of me. You are welcome to refuse your gift, Doctor. Frankly, it would be better for me since these will quite drain me of energy. After my journey here I only have strength for one before I need to rest."

"What is it?" 

"A Moment Of Clarity," Loki refrained from making a dramatic gesture since he knew it would only irritate his not too friendly audience. "Ask the Lady Jane if you are uncertain, I tried it out in her first."

"You tried it out?" Stark repeated incredulously. 

"It's a new spell," Loki shrugged. "At least on your kind." 

"Aye," Thor smiled awkwardly. "When Loki explained it Jane volunteered to try it out."

"She is a brave woman," agreed Loki. "Fool-hearted, but brave. The spell does what it says, it gives you a moment of clarity, what you see in that clarity is very individual. Lady Jane was allowed to understand the basic theory behind the Bifrost, a great discovery for a mortal. The Maiden Darcy said it gave her a new perspective on life, though she refused to tell me more. I'm not a mindreader."

"Maiden Darcy?" asked Stark with a smirk. 

"She refused to be called a lady," Loki smiled as he thought of the headstrong woman. "Who's first?"

"I am," Rogers stepped forward. "I'm used to being a lab-rat, and Hulk will have my back if you try anything."

"Why would I try anything?" 

"Because you are you," the captain bit off. "And I don't trust you."

Loki shrugged a 'fair enough'. He wasn't going to try anything though. Too much was riding on this for him to screw it up with some silly trick or mischief. The captain ought to be smart enough to understand that, but apparently not. 

"Are you going to read my mind?" 

"No," Loki rolled his eyes. "I can't do that. What you think of in your Moment Of Clarity is pure you."

"Let me go first," said Stark suddenly pushing Rogers aside.

"Why?" 

"My house?" Stark grinned up at the taller soldier. "For science?"

"Fine," Rogers backed away. "You go ahead."

Stark took his place in front of Loki. He was about half a head shorter but he still took up a lot of room. 

"What do I do?" 

"Just stand there," Loki reached out to touch the man's temples. 

"Do you really have to touch me?" 

"Yes, you just have to bare with it."

Loki watched Stark's eyes as he spoke the incantation. Jane had described the feeling of a sudden calm and then a bright idea. Darcy had seemed to agree, but hadn't told him any more. Her eyes had been sad though, like she found out an answer she didn't want to know. Loki hoped that Stark's moment of clarity would give him something good. An potential ally of his proportion would be hard to come by again. 

Then something mischievous came into Stark's eyes, Loki knew that look and it didn't bode well. 

"Well, I be damned," said Stark slowly. 

Then he kissed Loki right on the mouth. It was deep and soft and warm...

The next thing Loki knew he was wrestled down to the floor by several people at once and hauled off to a glass cage on the lower levels of the tower. He was still to shocked to notice most of it. 


	3. Sweet deceit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony tells his plan to his friends. 
> 
> Loki is a bit confused.

"Get that goddamn thing away from me." 

Tony irritatingly swatted away Bruce's hand that was holding a small flashlight. He had been wrestled away from Loki and pushed down into a chair. It had been a rough ending to a surprisingly pleasant kiss. Thor and Steve had dragged Loki away, presumably down to the Hulk-cage on the lower levels of the tower. 

Clint was holding him down, while Nat impatiently moved around the room ready to pounce on him on a moment's notice. 

"His eyes are clear," said Bruce. "Pulse is agitated."

"Of course it's fucking agitated," Tony tried to get up from the chair but was still held down by Clint. "JARVIS, tell them I'm fine."

"Sir is fine," JARVIS reported. "All his scans are normal. There is no trace of magic in his system."

"He's not fine!" Clint pointed at Tony's face. "He was kissing Loki! There's some serious not-fine going on in here!"

Tony sighed. He had come up with a great plan, unfortunately he was surrounded by people that were not up par with his own intelligence. Except for Bruce, though the guy had an emotional problem that overran his brain, and therefore could not entirely be trusted with genius in Tony's opinion. 

"It is fine," Tony tried again. "I'm not under a spell." 

"You must be," Bruce tried to blind him with the flashlight again but Tony batted it away. "Loki put a spell on you."

"Yeah? Weren't we all aboard on that? The clarity thing?"

His friends exchanged worried looks. Natasha stopped pacing, her fists clenching and unclenching. 

"Are you saying..." Clint frowned as he finally let Tony rise from the chair "...that your Moment of Clarity..." He took a breath "...made you fall in love with Loki?" 

"Of course not," Tony laughed and finally got to his feet since he wasn't held down anymore. "I finally solved the zero-gravity problem with the Iron Man suit though. Space walks here I come, baby." 

"But..." Bruce took a sudden breath of realisation. "Oh! Oh, you bastard."

Tony giggled evilly and walked over to the bar. He needed a large drink after this ordeal, and one more for what was coming up. 

"You didn't," Nat was the second one to get it. 

"What?" Clint asked. 

"Loki doesn't know what his spell will be, right?" Tony took a sip of scotch as he started to write down his brand new space walk idea in his phone. "If I say that it made me see him in a new light, then he'll have to believe me. I'll get close to him, really close, and then I can find out his real intentions."

"You are going to seduce Loki?" Bruce narrowed his eyes. "I'm not sure I will approve of this."

"Come on, Brucie," Tony rolled his eyes. "You know as well as the rest of us that Loki has a hidden agenda with all this redemption bullshit. He is a smooth talker I grant you that, but take it from a master, you don't smooth talk without something to smooth over."

Natasha laughed as she shook her head in disbelief. 

"And you are just going to sacrifice yourself?"

"Yes."

"And the fact that he's absolutely gorgeous has nothing to do with it?"

"I just have to suffer through," Tony emptied his glass. "Now if you excuse me I have a pretend-boyfriend to let out of a Hulk-proof cage."

He started to move towards the elevator but was stopped by a hand on his arm. 

"This is still very deceitful," sighed Bruce. "Neither Thor nor Steve will agree to this. And Thor really seems to trust Loki this time, for real. Jane Foster and Darcy Lewis at the sound of it as well."

"Well excuse us for still doubting," Clint raised his voice. "He took my headache and nightmares away, yes, that feels great. But if he's going to look after my unborn child, I'm going to need more than his word. I support Tony in this." 

"I'm not keen on the seduction part," Natasha put her hand on her stomach. "But I think the cause more than justifies the means."

"Thank you," Tony turned to Bruce. "Are you in?"

"Fine, but what about Thor and Steve?" 

"We simply don't tell them," Tony gave the man his most assuring smile. "Only we four will know, at least until I got what I need."

.....

 

Loki was done trying to explain himself to Thor and Captain Rogers. He had done the spell perfectly right, whatever had made Stark kiss him was not caused by him. 

Also how stupid would one be to believe there was such a thing as an infatuation spell? There were plenty of potions and trinkets that could emulate such things, but a spell? That was just silly. 

Anyone with even half a sense would know that awakening real feelings of love through magic was up there with raising the dead, possible but highly inconvenient, difficult, and plain out stupid. Unfortunately his captors didn't seem to have half a sense between them. 

Loki had explained all this to them several times before he gave up. 

"You did it before," reminded the captain. "With Clint."

"Did you ever see your archer kiss me? No! Has he said something about it? No! Do you see the staff with the Mind Stone attached in my hand? No!" Loki counted on his fingers. 

"I want to believe you, brother," Thor put a hand against the glass. "But..."

"But nothing!" Loki spat. "And don't you ever call me brother again. To think I came back from the dead for you."

"You hid for three months in disguise as Odin All-father before you even showed your true form to me."

"Only because I wanted to see how long it would take for you to screw things up. And this is not my true form, and you know it!"

It was building up to a real argument, one which Loki hoped would end with Thor breaking the cage with Mjölner. It didn't come to that, sadly, because at that moment the elevator doors opened and Stark walked out like he owned the place, which he of course did.

He was handsomely smiling, though his three friends following him were not. Loki tilted his head, trying to assert what it all meant. 

"JARVIS," said Stark walking up to the cage. "Would you please let out our guest?" 

"Certainly, sir," the computer complied and the door opened up almost gracefully. 

"I'm so sorry for the inconvenience, babe," Stark held out his hand to Loki. "But these thugs just needed some convincing."

"Hey," said Barton in an insulted manner. 

Loki only hesitated for a moment before placing his hand in Stark's. He didn't like being touched but something big was going on and he was not going to miss out. He even let himself be assisted down the small step down to the floor before quickly letting go of the hand.

"Tony," frowned Rogers. "What is going on?"

"My Moment of Clarity, Steve," Stark turned back to Loki. "I just realised what nice piece of ass was standing in front of me, and thought 'man, I want to tap that'." 

"Who are you calling an ass?" Loki narrowed his eyes. 

"Stark means your backside," informed Thor with a glare at Stark. "It's an midgardian expression."

"Oh," Loki felt a bit disgusted. 

Even so, this was shaping up to be far better than he anticipated. For the moment he decided not to question it. There was enough time later to find out what was going on. 

"Bruce?" Rogers turned to Banner. 

"It's true," Banner removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes. "There's no enchantment, no noticeable mind control, or anything else for that matter."

"But," Rogers looked at Loki. "I thought you said that you couldn't make someone fall in love with a spell?"

"No," Loki turned to Stark feeling a bit uncertain again. "I can't... Unless the feelings are already there and the Moment of Clarity brought them up to the surface."

"Surfaced, baby," Stark gave him a silly smile that then turned conspiring. "Truth is, I've always thought you were hot, it's just not something you go around telling people about your enemy. Even Nat said you were absolutely gorgeous just moments ago."

"Shut up," hissed Romanoff. 

Loki felt shocked and drained. What ever little energy he had left after traveling, giving the spell to Stark, and arguing with Thor was running out. He felt his legs give out and his right knee hit the floor. Stark made a concerned noise. 

"He is tired," informed Thor. "He still doesn't have all his powers back since his injury."

"Why don't you tell them everything, why don't you?" Loki glared at him. 

"Let's take him to my bedroom," Stark looked into Loki's eyes. "I think you are going to like it there."

Loki wasn't sure if he should feel safe or very worried.


	4. Meetings and small discoveries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony feels confident as usual. Loki is not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long chapter this time.
> 
> This headcanon includes the events in 'Agents of SHEILD', not much of it is mentioned, but it's there.

"We must ask Jane Foster over," said Tony coming back down the spiral staircase from his bedroom to the common room after tucking Loki in under the covers of his luxurious bed. "I'm really interested in what she realised about the Bifrost,"

Only Steve and Bruce were left in the room. Nat and Clint had gone off to their own room, nest, or whatever, to presumably discuss their eminent new family. They hadn't had any time alone together since before the chaos had erupted earlier that morning. 

Thor had withdrawn to clean himself up and get some rest, he had flown by Mjölner the better part of the night to get to New York from New Mexico. 

"Yes, we should bring her here," agreed Bruce looking up from his computer and glancing past Tony up towards the above floor. "Do you think it's all right to leave him unguarded like that?"

"JARVIS is keeping an eye on him, or rather seven cameras to be more precise."

"Why do you have seven cameras in your bedroom?" asked Steve who had been standing by the large panoramic windows looking out over the city.

"Angles," Tony walked over to the bar to get himself a drink. "How long does it take to fly here from New Mexico?"

"Six hours commercial?" Bruce shrugged. "Probably less with a private jet. Thor said he did it in about three hours, but that's him with his magic hammer, not even your jets are that fast."

"Not those on the plane anyway," Tony looked at the time, it was almost four thirty. "Those on the suit though... Anyway, JARVIS, send my private jet to collect Jane Foster and her delightful friend in... Where are they anyway?"

"Apache Point Observatory," informed JARVIS. "It was were they were sent by SHEILD after the incident in London."

"Yes," Tony rolled his eyes. "Incident. More like a party I wasn't invited to. Get them over here as soon as possible."

"Yes, sir."

Steve turned away from the large windows, his eyes were tired and seemed to show all his ninety-five years. 

"Does this mean you trust Loki now?" he asked. 

"Not really," Tony shrugged. "But I guess can give him a benefit of a doubt, and I guess that is what what he wants." 

There was a moment of silence in the room. Tony looked towards his bedroom and then to one of the monitors he had installed behind the bar. The screen showed several angles of a sleeping god on a large bed. Loki seemed to have been telling the truth about his exhaustion. 

Tony didn't like to lie to Steve, and he didn't like to lie to himself either. At least not anymore. He used to be an expert at lying to himself, but that ability had somewhat diminished since his stretch in a small cave in Afghanistan. 

Although pretending in front of Steve to be attracted to a devious madman wasn't really lying to himself, was it? 

"What are you doing?" Tony asked Bruce to escape the subject. 

"Preparing myself," Bruce turned the computer screen momentarily for Tony to see. "Jane said on the phone, when I called to ask her for a Loki-alibi, that what she saw in her moment of clarity was her most recent research. I thought if I go through the areas of my research that gives me most trouble I'll have it fresh in my mind later when Loki awakes."

"Sounds like a good idea."

"What did you think of?" asked Steve walking over to Tony the bar and giving him a critical look. "When you fell in love with Loki?"

"'Love'? Who said anything about love?" Tony gulped down his drink and then immediately poured a new one. "I find him attractive sure, but love? Big words there, bud. We hardly know each other more than he threw me out of that window over there one time."

Steve frowned. Tony looked down at the images of Loki again, the guy seemed to be asleep, but who could say for sure? Tony had heard stories about astral projection and body duplication from Thor. He must really learn to watch his tongue. 

"Why do you ask?" Tony winked. "Do you find him attractive as well and afraid that we will end up a threesome? Just so you know, I'm not totally opposed to that."

"Is everything a joke to you?" Steve glared at him. "Sorry, we have gone through this before and I still don't agree with your answer."

"Hey, calm down, Cap." Tony held up his empty hands in defence. "Haven't you even seen someone in a new light. Maybe realised that they weren't that bad after all? That they had their reasons why they acted like they did?"

"And what was Loki's reason?" 

"I'm sure he's going to tell us," Tony eyed the scotch bottle but am decided against it for now. "We already know the Glow Stick Of Destiny wasn't his to begin with."

"Yeah," Bruce looked up from his research. "SHEILD hauled that off somewhere, but then there were those Hydra attracts on their warehouses that they still refuse to give us the locations of..."

"Another party we were not invited to," huffed Tony. "Honestly, it seems like the new SHEILD management doesn't trust us. Not even with their names. Since Fury died we're getting nothing from them."

Steve turned away towards the windows again. He didn't like to talk about Fury having been the one that failed to save him. Tony felt bad for bringing it up. That whole affair was an ant nest when it came to the captain. 

"You would have stolen as much tech from that place as Hydra did," Bruce tried to joke to release the tension. 

"Yeah, but I would have done it in the name of science," Tony left the bar to sit down beside his friend on the sofa. "And if you could teach Hulk how to do fine motor skills, you would as well."

Bruce gave a snort that neither confirmed nor denied. Tony sighed. 

"I've been putting it off long enough," he said with a grimace. "JARVIS, call Hill. Get her over here."

"Why?" Steve looked his way. 

"As my Chief of Security she needs to know about Loki," Tony stared dully at Bruce's computer screen. "I don't want my bodyguards killing off my new boyfriend, do I?"

 

.......

 

Loki woke up from his bad dreams by the sound of women screaming in anger in the other room. He knew immediately that he was the cause of it and therefore he didn't bother to move. The bed was soft and comfortable and far better than any he had slept in since his own back in Asgard before Thor's cursed botched coronation. 

Stark had been right, he did like this room. He wished he could stay there a while longer. Sadly then the door opened and let some light in, making Loki aware that the room had been completely dark. 

"Eh, babe?" Stark's voice sounded unsure about the word. "You better come out here and explain yourself again, because I'm getting my ass kicked out here."

"Again with the ass," murmured Loki as he got up from the bed. "Who am I explaining myself to?"

"My Chief of Security," Stark looked very nervous. "And my C.E.O. She just happened to come along as well..."

"What does than mean?" 

Loki smoothed over his shirt and hair with a hint of magic to look more decent, not too much magic though since he would need his strength to give Banner and Rogers their gifts. He would have just enough power in him to do two Moments of Clarity before needing rest again. Thor had not been lying when he said Loki still suffered from his injuries, as well as from other things. 

"Chief Executive Officer," Stark answered. "She runs my company for me. She's also one of my best friends so please take it easy on her."

He seemed to hesitate for a short moment but then took Loki's hand in his. It was a nervous gesture, and also a little bit forced. It was almost like Stark was trying to prove something, and maybe he did. Loki squeezed the hand lightly but then quickly let go. He was beginning to fear that Stark, quite opposite from him, was a very tactile creature. 

All of the Avengers were there down in the common room, as well as three new people, a man and two women. The two women were both slim, tall, and carried an inner strength that could compare them almost to Romanoff. Loki felt immediate respect for both of them and recognised them both as worthy allies. It would seem that he had more gifts to dispense than originally planned. 

The man had a fighter's round bulky body. Stark cleared his throat. 

"Happy Hogan, Maria Hill, and Pepper Potts," he introduced, as he pointed them out. "Loki... Eh... What's your last name?" 

"I have none," Loki refused to look Thor's way. 

Thankfully there was no time for expansion or argument since the woman who Stark introduced as Pepper began laughing. It was a familiar sound to Loki's ears, one of madness. He couldn't help but to smile at the sound of it. 

"Pep?" Stark sounded a bit panicked. 

"I knew it," she breathed between bursts of laughter. "I knew it. You finally snapped, haven't you? And you are taking me right with you."

"I haven't snapped."

"So it's just me then," she rubbed her forehead, laughing and then sobbing lightly. 

The man called Happy came forward and hugged her, she leaned tiredly against him. 

"Look," the other woman, Hill, had her hand on the weapon in her hip. "I don't care who has gone insane or not, my concern is what kind of threat his presence makes."

"I pose no threat, my lady," Loki made a small bow. "In fact quite the opposite, I'm here to help."

Barton gave an incredulous snort of a laugh. 

"I thought you were here with I give us gifts?"

"Gifts that could help."

"You tell'm, babe," Stark smiled and patted Loki on the back.

Loki wasn't the only giving Stark an evil glare after that. Potts' angry stare seemed to be able to burn a hole in Stark's soul, she wasn't laughing anymore. The man held up both his hands in a placating manner. 

"Sorry."

"That's the other thing," Hill narrowed her eyes. "Are you together now?"

"He opened up my eyes," grinned Stark, giving Loki a sudden mix of of emotions mostly dominated by incredibility. "Put him on the security list."

"Hang on!" Barton yelled. "Are we supposed to protect him now? What kind of bullshit is that?"

"Yes," agreed Hill. "Though only mostly because the greatest threats to his security is inside this room right now."

How wrong they were, thought Loki. With or without their protection, this was actually the safest place he could be right now. Not that he would say that out loud just yet. 

"I can take care of myself," he said. "As I said before, I expect nothing to in return."

"Well," Banner stood up. "It seems that you have gotten things in return, even though you didn't ask for them. Now give me my gift so I can get out of here, the ambiance in this room makes me feel uncomfortable."

"Of course, Doctor Banner, let me oblige you,"

The whole room seemed to tense up when Loki placed his fingers on Banner's temples. He couldn't help but to feel a bit nervous about it himself when he looked into the other man's eyes and spoke the spell. 

"Oh," Banner took a breath and closed his eyes. "Oh."

Loki became even more nervous when nothing else happened. He glanced around the room at the others. Everyone were looking intently at Banner. Thor's grip of Mjölner seemed twitchy, like he expected something to erupt at any moment. 

"Brucie?" asked Stark carefully. 

"What did you do to him?" asked Hill. 

"I don't know," Loki hated to admit it, but he had to be honest. "It's very individual. I'm not a mind reader. Darcy Lewis had a similar reaction though..."

And she hadn't told him anything about it afterwards. 

"I'm... fine," Banner slowly opened his eyes, they were still brown with no hint or green, his expression was calm. "It's just a lot to think about."

"Any scientific breakthroughs?" asked Stark in a hopeful tone. 

"Are you in love with Loki?" asked Rogers in a lesser one. 

Loki felt a bit of panic at this question. This was only the fourth time he had used the spell since adapting it to Midgardians, and the third time it had seemed to go wrong. He had trusted the spell because with Jane, the very first trial, everything had gone right. But what had happened in the following three? He couldn't ask either, since then he would probably loose the small amount of faith he had earned. 

He noticed Stark frown at the mention of the word 'love' though. 

"Neither," Banner rubbed his face. "At least I don't think so. I need to go to to my room, it's late I need to lay down."

"I'll come with you," offered Rogers. 

"No, no," Banner waived him off, walking towards the elevator. "I'll be fine. You get yours from Loki."

"Is it safe?" Romanoff frowned. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine, just fine..." Banner gave a weak smile. "Go on, Steve. It's fine."

The elevator door closed behind him. Loki shifted internally as he looked around the room, his eyes landing on Stark who looked concerned. 

"He is in no danger," Loki assured him. "His Clarity was obviously emotional, it can take time to adjust. You know that, you went through it yourself." 

"Yeah," said Stark, blinking and then, to Loki's unease, touched Loki's arm. "I did, didn't I?"

"As did Darcy Lewis," reminded Thor. 

"Should someone go after him?" asked Potts. 

"JARVIS?" Stark asked out into space. "What's Bruce doing?"

"It seems that he is preparing for bed, sir," answered the artificial intelligence. 

"That's all right then?" Rogers asked.

Loki rubbed his hands together, he was loosing some of his previously earned control over the situation. His head was starting to pound with pain. The recovery wasn't going that well, especially with the new burden he recently had taken on from Barton. He refrained from making a grimace. 

"Shall we continue?" he asked in a practiced calm voice. "As the doctor said, it's getting late. Captain?"

"I'm not filled with confidence here," said Rogers. "Tony fell in love with you, and now Bruce got some kind of a breakdown."

Again Stark seemed to react badly at the word 'love', but he said nothing about it. Loki looked at him briefly, but the man just smiled back like a silly loon. He turned back to Rogers. 

"My intention is not to harm you," he tried to explain. "I would gain nothing by doing that,"

"So you are after some gain?"

"Captain," Loki sighed as his headache increased. "We have discussed this, and we can do it again, but isn't it easier just to accept my gift?"

"Fine," Rogers stepped forward. "Give it to me."

Stark giggled and got more dirty looks from around the room. The man was beginning to grow on Loki. 

"Certainly, Captain," Loki placed his fingers on the tall man's temples and prayed to god be Norns that this time the spell would work as it was supposed to. 

Rogers eyes were blue, almost as blue as Thor's. It didn't make it better when they widened like in terror and then blinked rapidly in nonplussed panic. Loki stepped away, ready to flee. He mostly trusted the spell, but if they didn't...

"Oh my gosh," said Rogers in a breath. "I didn't even look at... And all those... How could I have been so blind?"

"Cap?" Barton asked nervously.

Barton had placed himself between Romanoff and the rest of the room. It was an obvious reflex on his part and he suddenly looked very guilty for having done so. Romanoff just rolled her eyes and pushed him aside and walked determinedly up to the captain. 

"What did you see?" she asked, gently placing a hand on his forearm. 

"I know where Bucky is," he took a deep breath. 

"How?" 

"I can predict his movements." Rogers took another breath. "All the reports I've read, the tracks and traces I found, the satellite images... I know... At least for the moment. Come on, we need to go Washington now."

"I'm coming with you," said Barton. 

"So will I," said Romanoff. 

"Nat..." began Rogers. 

"Shut up," she hissed. "Don't you dare thinking that exclude me because I'm pregnant. I'm coming with you."

Rogers seemed to go through an inner battle. Loki thought it quite amusing, he was also relived about the spell had worked. 

"She can pilot the jet," interjected Barton. "She doesn't have to leave it, just be backup."

Romanoff gave him an angry glare but didn't object, probably knowing arguing would take up time. Rogers seemed to think the same because he agreed with a stiff nod. The four of them left the room. Loki relaxed. 

"Who is Bucky?" asked Thor. 

"An old friend of his," said Stark. "Hill can fill you in on the details." He turned to Potts who seemed to have calmed down considerably. "Pep, you okay?"

"No," she narrowed her eyes at him. "I'm not 'okay'. How can I bloody be 'okay'? My best friend, and my to that my ex-boyfriend, has taken up with a murderous alien madman. What in this is 'okay'?"

"To be fair," Loki interjected. "The murderous part wasn't entirely my choice..."

"Really, Loki?" Stark gave him a look. "Pep, let's you and I talk in private. Let's go to my office. Happy, Hill, you too."

Loki watched them leave into an adjacent room, Stark gave him an apologetic smile before closing the door behind them. 

Then there was only Thor left. Loki felt like he was being left out of something, though Thor seemed to be left out too. It didn't feel comforting, though. 

"How are you feeling?" Thor asked, his eyes darting to Loki's right side but then met his eyes. 

"I'm a bit tired," Loki allowed himself to show a bit of weakness in front of Thor, even though he didn't like it, it showed trust. "What have you told them about me?"

"The truth, what else?" Thor straightened. "That I thought you dead after the battle with the Dark Elf Malekith. I told them that you tried to take on father's appearance and place as king, but that your injuries were too severe to let you hide unnoticed for too long. And I told them that I brought you to Midgard to protect you from the angry mob that formed in Asgard afterwards."

Loki nodded, he hadn't expected anything less. He would never redeem himself in the eyes of Asgard, even if his short reign as Odin had been a quite wise one. He would build something new here in this realm, as soon as his current problems had been dealt with. 

"What happened with Doctor Banner?" asked Thor. 

"I don't know," Loki shook his head. "Maybe he was just overwhelmed by what he saw, and needed a bit of time to grasp it."

At that moment Stark returned out from his office. He was followed by his three friends that didn't look in the least comforted by what ever he had said to them to calm them down. On the contrary they seemed even more angry. Though Loki wasn't sure if the anger was directed towards him or Stark. 

"Babe," Stark placed an arm around Loki's back, the touch prickled uncomfortably. "What do you say you and me retire for the evening? I'm sure you need to rest some more." 

"I do..." Loki felt rattled over the sudden closeness that Stark displayed, but the man's personality combined with the insight of the spell could very well warrant that. "Are you finished talking?"

"Yes," Stark steered Loki back towards the stairs to the bedroom. "I've told them all about my feelings for you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm aware that Loki's reactions to touch can be confusing to some, but it's how I see his character in this story. And no, he is not touch-starved, and can not be 'cured' with a hug.


	5. Nightly adventures

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first consequences of Loki's gift to Bruce make theirselves known. And quite a lot of nudity....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Due to a horrible iPhone writing app accident I have lost EVERYTHING!!! I'm still in shock. My entire 35000 word buffert is permanently gone! (So are about twelve other WIPs, including some sequels to other published works in Sherlock and Avengers that I know some of you were waiting for.)  
> I'm going to do my best to keep up the updates once a week on this fic as I slowly try to reconstruct it. I had some issues with the lost plot so I'm forcing myself to see this as an opertunity for improvement.

Tony was sitting on his bed, leaning back against the headboard and pillows. He was splitting his attention between looking over Loki sleeping beside him and sketching blueprints of the Iron Man space suit on his StarkPad. The Clarity that Loki had given him was amazing, if he had had this knowledge when he had gone into that wormhole a few months back who knows what could have happened? Well, first off all, he would be dealing with one near-death experience less. 

He shivered before the thought could take him on a weird tangent and then yawned. It wasn't that late, about half passed seven, anyway Tony was a master in staying awake. Then again, nothing interesting was going to happen around here until Jane and Darcy arrived and that was at least four hours out according to the last report. He might as well take a nap.

A text message from Clint in Washington popped up on the top of the screen. It was just an update of status quo, nothing to report. Steve had met up with a friend, Sam Wilson, who was now helping them in their search for the elusive Winter Soldier. Tony had never Wilson personally, just that one time when he had instructed Steve in how to set up a secure online video chat and they had called up Wilson just to try it out. He seemed like a decent guy though. 

Also, more importantly, Wilson was in possession of the last remaining pair of the mechanical wings Tony once dreamt up for the US military. Literally, the damn things were born out of dreams fuelled by hallucinations caused by broken deadlines, too much alcohol, too many burritos, and a documentary about pelicans on the National Geographic channel. He would love to get his hands on them again and fix whatever stupidity the military mechanics undoubtedly had done to them. 

He glanced to Loki as the man moved slightly in his sleep. Tony couldn't remember the last time he had shared a bed with someone he hadn't had sex with, or was about to. With Loki it was different, not that Tony wouldn't gladly lend his body to Loki in exchange for secrets and pleasure, but he had never used deceit to do that before. Well, he admitted to himself, at least not the toying-with-emotions kind of deceit. 

He wasn't pretending in love with Loki, just exploring possibilities. He doubted very much that Loki believed him to be in love, since love apparently couldn't be created. But saying that he actually got true feelings from a literal Moment of Clarity was some kind of commitment in Tony's book. Loki must think so as well because he was obviously trusting Tony to watch him sleep, and Loki was clearly a very private person. It was confusing and probably would be even more so if he tried to make sense out of it, or ponder on it too long.

Tony sighed and settled in for a nap. He lay down so that he faced Loki, who was on his side. This angle was actually quite endearing, the otherwise so thoughtful and mischievous face was relaxed, except for a permanent wrinkle furrowed between the dark eyebrows. Tony thought about touching it to make it go away, but refrained. Loki didn't seem to appreciate things like that. 

It was surprisingly easy to fall asleep, even with Loki so close. Tony had erratic dreams about flying, both with and without the suit, between deserts and starry skies. It was pretty smooth sailing until a siren suddenly blared him awake so fast he would have fallen off the bed if Loki hadn't grabbed a panicked hold of his arm. 

"What the fuck?" Tony breathed regained his balance and the noise stopped. "Ouch, that really hurts."

"Sorry," Loki let go, his eyes darting about the room and the dark windows with the familiar New York night outside. "Are they attacking?" 

"Who?" Tony looked over his arm, there were definitely going to be bruises from the hard grip.

"Sir," JARVIS interjected "Code Green in the kitchen."

Hulk was out and about and raking havoc. No, wait. Tony paused halfway out of the room and listened, there were no sounds of havoc being raked. He looked back at Loki and made a sign for him to take it slow, Hulk might be calm now but that could change if he caught sight of Loki. 

Tony slowly stepped out of the room, carefully making his way towards the stairs. Loki stood in the doorway, he looked worried but motioned unpatiently for Tony to go ahead. Tony smirked back, Loki's badly hidden fear was kind of sweet. 

The common room was shrouded in husky night light from the city outside and a few appliances about the room. Judging by your the dark sky Tony must have slept for longer than four hours. As he descended the round stairs he could hear two voices. He recognised the deep gruff of Hulk's monosyllabic tones, the other one was clearly female. 

"I don't really think..." the woman warily objected. "I mean... Oh, okay?"

"Hello?" Tony walked slowly towards the kitchen. "Oh!"

Hulk was sitting on the floor, in front of the open refrigerator. It looked like Bruce had gone for a midnight snack of some sort, it had happens before someone hat wasn't strange. In his arms though, like a baby or a doll, was Darcy Lewis. She gave a hesitant but relieved smile when she caught sight of Tony.

"Hi!" she waived. "Your jet is so cool."

"Thanks," Tony leaned against the kitchen island. "How are you? How was the flight?"

"Not bad..." She glanced at Hulk and then back at Tony. "Is he wearing pants?"

"No," Tony noted Bruce's torn pyjamas on the floor, you'd think the guy would learn to always wear expandable clothing. "Sorry."

"I was afraid of that. I knew heard something rip."

"What happened?" 

"Pretty girl," said Hulk and adjusted Darcy in his arms like he was a smaller version of King Kong, hopefully he wouldn't get it he urge to scale the tower.

"Thank you," Darcy preened a bit. "Actually I was just going for a snack and bumped into Doctor Banner here. I think he was a bit edgy."

"Apparently," Tony looked over his shoulder back at Loki who was halfway down the stairs. "And understandable. He had a charged moment with Loki earlier."

"Oh."

"This is not my fault," Loki protested from halfway down the stairs.

At the sound of Loki's voice Hulk growled. Tony hurried forward, he had no desire to have his floor smashed to pieces again. Also, his pretend relationship with Loki would probably suffer at that. Tony raised his arms, holding up his open hands between them. 

"Babe, stand back. Let me handle this."

"Don't call me a babe," muttered Loki but did as he said. 

"Oh!" gushed Darcy. "So you are together! Thor told us but I almost didn't believe it. That is so totally cute."

"Totally," Tony rolled his eyes. 

Hulk growled again, flexing his huge green muscles. Darcy made a small exhale as she was shifted against his chest. 

"Calm down, big guy," Tony tried to look relaxed again, the mission now was to make Hulk let go of Darcy, and then calmly either de-hulk him or escort him to the cage. "Don't mind the pretty boy, look at the pretty girl."

"Pretty girl?" Hulk looked at Darcy in slight confusion. 

"Yes. She surprised you didn't she? You were going for a snack because you were a bit upset, right? And the pretty girl surprised you?"

Pliny had long since started to address Bruce and Hulk as the same person in these kinds of situations, it seemed to be the most efficient way to ground Hulk's thoughts and steer him away from destruction. 

"Snack?" Hulk glanced at the open refrigerator, a shelf had come loose, a pickle jar was dangerously close to falling, and a carton of milk was dripping its last contains on the floor. "Hulk hungry."

"Yes..."

Tony was interrupted by the elevator opening and Thor, Hill, and Jane coming out. Thor was only wearing boxer shorts and holding on to Mjölner, a sight that Tony hoped JARVIS was filming and saving for later since he himself couldn't concentrate on it too much at the moment. The women were wearing t-shirts and sweatpants. Hill was in addition clutching a small black case in her right hand. It was the tranquilliser that Bruce had created for extreme emergencies. 

Hulk roared at the sight of them, hugging Darcy closer like an overprotective mother bear. 

"Darcy," Jane sighed as if Darcy was regularly captured by huge rage monsters. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing," Darcy's breath was a bit strained. "Though I think I got a new boyfriend."

Thor raised his hammer.

"That won't be necessary," Tony quickly placed himself in the way. "I'm handling this, there's no need to electorate my kitchen appliances."

"Loki," Thor caught sight of his brother hiding behind the spiral staircase. "What did you do?"

"I did nothing!" Loki hissed angrily showing his teeth. 

Hulk growled. 

"Uh, guys?" Darcy sounded worried. 

Hulk was standing up, his head gracing the ceiling. He seemed to be in a mood of choosing between flight or fight. Tony hoped it was neither since both would take a severe toll on his interior design. The fact that Hulk was naked didn't help much. Jane made a squeal and turned away. 

"Bruce?" Tony held up his hands. "Take it easy. You are safe. You are scaring the pretty girl."

At this Hulk looked very sad, he adjusted Darcy more delicately on his arm before sitting down again. Tony breathed a sigh of relief, he had noted Hill sneaking up behind Hulk with a huge syringe but she was now taking a step back. 

"Bruce alone," Hulk sighed. 

Tony blinked. He met Hill's eyes but she just shrugged. Tony looked to Thor who was frowning as he clenched and unclenched his fist around his hammer. Jane was still turned away. 

"Aw," Darcy patted Hulk's bulging pectoral. 

"You are not alone, buddy," Tony braved going forward and placing a hand on Hulk's forearm, it was warm. "We are here with you."

"Aye," said Thor. 

"He doesn't mean it like that, duh," Darcy rolled her eyes at them and speaking in a tone berated their enormous stupidity. "He doesn't mean alone alone."

"What?" Tony looked at her. 

"He means lonely," said Loki's voice from behind him. "Obviously."

Tony could feel Hulk tense under his hand but he just sighed again and then relaxed in some sort of resignation. Tony took the opportunity to hold out his hand to Darcy, she took it and slid easily out of Hulk's grip down to the floor. Hulk looked at his empty hands, his massive bulk shuttered like if a chill went through him. 

This wasn't good. One of Tony's best friends, in fact the only friend he could hold a decent non-dumbing-down conversation with, was sad. There were two ways to go here, well, three if you counted starting blaming Loki for everything, though that wasn't an option with the current situation. Either Tony would take Bruce for a deep emotional heart to heart, or...

"Hey, Bruce?" Tony smiled his best encouraging smile. "You know what I'm going to do? I'm going to throw you a party."

"Par-ty?" Hulk's big nose wrinkled. 

"Yup! It's going to be awesome. Lots of people, food, and drink, and music, and..."

"Idiot," sighed Loki.

"Hey, parties beats therapy every time ," Tony grinned not turning away from his friend. "It's the good old Stark family way and I hasn't failed me yet."

It was a good thing neither Pepper nor Rhodey were there to hear this. Hulk narrowed his eyes in a very Bruce-like manner that told Tony that he wasn't fooling anyone.

"So much is clearer now," Loki snapped his fingers and a white sheet, suspiciously resembling the one on Tony's bed, appeared hanging on his hand. "Now I demand you cover him up before I start having worse nightmares than I already have."

"I don't understand," Thor took the sheet from Loki and walked over to the kitchen, his broad shoulders were not as distracting as Hulk's nudity but came close second, Tony had a beefcake-joke but managed to reel it in. "What did Loki do to him?"

"Fanskap!" Loki said in a way that indicated to Tony it was most likely a swear-word of some sort. "I didn't do anything! My spell opens a door," he indicated with his hands. "What comes out of that door is already there. You know this! I can not manipulate minds!"

"You did in the battle," Thor turned to him. "And I seen you do it before."

"I had the staff in the battle! It had the Mind Stone! It affected me as well! And before? Before what? Before, when people actually listened to my advise? Before, when they respected me? Or at least pretended to?"

"You brought that on yourself! With your lies and manipulations."

"Like I'm the only one who does that! And maybe if I hadn't been lied to my entire life I wouldn't be so good at it. Maybe if someone had explained to me why I was so different..."

"Father explained..." bellowed Thor, Mjölner crackling in him fisted grip. 

"He explained nothing!" screamed Loki, magic sparking around him. "He made excuses!"

"If you hurt my friend I'm going to..."

"Are you accusing me of something?" 

There was a patch of red blood slowly sipping into the side Loki's shirt. No one seemed to notice it except for Tony. No, Jane had noticed it as well, or at least Tony guessed that she had since she suddenly seemed both nauseous and dizzy, and had to sit down on the floor.

"Uh, guys?" 

Tony tried to get the arguing aliens' attention. The literal electric tension in the room was cut by a roar that shook the room. Hulk was no longer confused, he was just really angry. Tony did what his first instinct told him to, grabbing hold of Darcy and getting the hell out of the way. He could hear the sound of a pickle jar shattering as he ran. 

He hugged Darcy behind the kitchen island, protecting her with his body. Another roar was heard and the sound of a woman grunting in pain. The next moment was eerily quiet and then there was something heavy falling to the floor, taking several, most likely expensive, things with it. 

Then it was all quiet again. Tony quickly looked over the top of the island, and then looked again because he had been too quick the first time. 

Hulk was motionless facedown on the floor, together with the microwave and the coffeemaker (goddammit), there was a large syringe planted in his green shoulder. Not far away by the window Hill was getting unsteadily to her feet, she swayed slightly as she tried to stand, her left arm seemed to be giving her some trouble. Thor was over by Jane, holding her hand and patting her hair. Loki was very pale, he was holding a hand over the bleeding in his side and staring back at Tony with an empty look in his eyes. 

"Yeah," Tony nodded and helped Darcy to her feet. "A party totally sounds great right about now."

"Totally," she agreed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder to always turn the automatic safety update on.


	6. Getting on with business

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next day. Loki gets new clothes, Tony has to go save people.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The reconstruction of the story seems to go well, I hope I will remember it correctly.
> 
> Thank you for reading.

The mirror in Stark's bathroom covered the entire wall above the two conjoined sinks. Loki was looking at his own reflection. He was naked save for a towel around his waist. He had just taken one of the best showers in his life, and that said quite a lot.

It was morning. Loki had spent the rest of the night in Stark's bed. According to JARVIS, Stark had spent the night in Banner's bed. Apparently Stark had not wanted to leave his heavily sedated friend alone, especially not after the confession of him feeling lonely. Loki thought it was quite admirable, not that he would ever admit it. 

Stark had summoned his armour, and together he and Thor had carried the huge green beast to its room. It had been a interesting sight, one that Loki would treasure for a long time. 

Hill and Darcy had cleaned up most of the mess in the kitchen while he had done some first aid on himself, and looked then over Jane. She had insisted that she was fine, the sight of blood had just made her nauseous and taken her off guard. It was strange since she was not usually weak at the sight of blood. She had even insisted on examining his injuries when he first arrived to Midgård. 

Loki swore as he moved in a way that put strain to his wound.

Cursed be the enchanted blades of Svartalfheim and their effect on the flesh of Frostgiants. The wound was still healing, the edges of the skin were held together by a crust of ice and frost that generated naturally from Loki's own body. The permanent glamour that kept his skin from turning blue could not hide the nuances of purple, red, and grey that covered the left half of his torso in patterns of bruises and veins. 

It was painful, but not as painful as the pain he had taken over from Barton. How the human had managed to live with it was a mystery. But then again Loki had already been dealing with his own pain, and Barton's was just adding on to it. Also, both pains originated from the same source, it wasn't that unthinkable that they would join together, mostly at the front of his head and neck muscles. He would learn to live with this too, with time, discipline, and practice. 

There were other scars on his body, he ignored them, they were healed even though some of the memories attached to them were not. He forced his mind away from them. It was too dangerous to dwell on those thoughts for too long since it was always a risk of someone listening in and finding him. It was too early to be found. He didn't have enough protection yet. 

The thought of scars made him think of Coulson. It was lady Sif that had told Thor that Coulson was still alive. She had met him after following an escaped prisoner to Midgard. Thor had brought Loki to see the man. Loki had managed to take away most of the scars left from the surgeries that Coulson had undergone to save him from the damage that the staff had made. It had been Loki's first act of redemption. 

Loki had felt that there had been more damage than Coulson had been willing to share. The biggest damage of course being death. Loki did not ask and Coulson did not tell. Loki already knew anyway, he could feel it in the human's blood and life force, and he understood the silence.

He wondered how much the Avengers' attitudes against him would change if they knew Coulson was alive, or rather resurrected to be technical about it. It would probably make his redemption easier. But who was to say that anything should be easier for Loki, dishonoured price of Asgard? 

The Avengers were not to know of Coulson's resurrection, nor of his new assignation as director of the organisation known as SHEILD. Thor had been very bothered by this, but had been convicted that is was for the best. Loki of course had no choice but to comply. Humans and their inconvenient secrets. Loki scowled at his own face in the mirror. Not surprisingly, he looked tired. 

 

"Loki?" Stark's voice was muffled by the closed door leading back to the bedroom. "Are you decent? Don't care, coming in."

Natural morning light from the large windows in the bedroom mixed with the florescent light of the bathroom. Stark was still wearing the same clothes from last night but more rumpled. Loki didn't bother to cover himself up, though he did do his best to look irritated as the human entered. Stark's wasn't discouraged. His eyes traveled over Loki's body, pausing on the towel, and stopping on the iced over scar. 

"That looks nasty," he frowned and met Loki's eyes, a worried slant to his head and a wrinkle above his nose revealed his thoughts. "Is that ice?"

"Yes," Loki turned back to his reflection, twisting his hand to summon a hairbrush. "Is Banner well?"

He felt uncomfortable under Stark's obvious scrutiny, but, strangely enough, it still felt like it was something he could get used to. There was a curious aura about the man that made Loki feel safe. It was partly due to the honesty created of the Moment of Clarity, but the rest was all Stark. 

Loki started brushing his hair, it was still wet from the shower and would start to curl if he didn't do something about it. 

"Well as can be with a depression and a hell of a sore shoulder," Stark shrugged. "He wanted to sleep some more and kicked me out. JARVIS is monitoring him. You finished with the shower? You don't want to know how much he sweats when he de-hulks. I'm soaked. Do you think I can get superpowers by bathing in radioactive sweat? Not as cool as a radioactive spider or cosmic rays, but I'll take what I can get..."

As he kept on babbling he was also undressing. The human's body was esoterically pleasing, not muscular like Thor, nor lean as Loki himself, more compact in a way. Stark was certainly not shy about his body, it was not until he was left with only his undergarments that he paused and looked hesitant. Loki rolled his eyes. 

"I didn't take you for a shy man, Stark."

"I'm not," he patted his stomach. "Abs of steel, well, at least hard aluminium. I just..."

"What ever Thor might have said about my aversion to touch, nor what you already concluded, doesn't make me a prude, Stark."

"Sorry," Stark laughed and fingered the waistband to his underwear. "Fuck, suddenly I'm embarrassed, how did this happen?"

"Don't worry," Loki smirked. "I'll leave."

"Can I see?" 

Stark gestured towards Loki's side and the wound. 

Loki put down the brush and put a hand over the wound, he could feel the coolness of the ice through his skin. He could feel the power pulsating underneath, power he no longer had full control over. He met Stark's eyes, they were open and honest. 

"I promise I won't touch," Stark put his hands on his back.

Loki took a breath and took away his hand. Stark leaned forward, Loki could feel the warmth of his breath against the coldness of the iced skin. 

"Why isn't it healing? It's at least three months old isn't it?"

"It heals, just very slowly," he sighed and walked past Stark into the bedroom. "The blade did not agree with me."

"Is the there any blade stabbing you that does?" Stark followed him. 

There were a pair of soft grey trousers and a black shirtsleeved shirt on the bed. Loki looked them over, the trousers were too short, and the shirt had the word 'megadeath' written over the chest and an image of a gruesome scull underneath. He raised an eyebrow towards Stark who just shrugged. 

"Any underwear?" Loki held up piece of red cloth that had been underneath the trousers. "Something that is not fuelled with your fantasies of me wearing this?"

"What?" Stark tried to look innocent but was not good enough to fool Loki who wouldn't have believed him even if he had succeeded to pull it off. "They are clean!"

Loki threw the red thing at Stark, it fell to the floor. He human grinned mischievously and walked over to the wardrobe where he took out a small thin paper box with a black and white image of a muscular man dressed very similar to himself, and threw it to Loki. 

"Brand new pair," Stark winked. "Don't say I don't spoil you. Might be a bit loose around the waist, since you're a rail, but they'll fit you."

"Thank you," Loki rolled his eyes and unpacked the garment. 

"Go downstairs and have some breakfast," Stark said, still smiling his silly smile that he probably thought was charming. "I'll take a shower, have three cups of coffee, and then we will have a talk, okay? There are some questions I need you to answer."

"Only some?" Loki laughed and pulled the clothes on under the towel, the underwear were indeed a bit too large but they stayed up. "If one of them is what happened to Doctor Banner, I'm afraid I can't answer that."

"Yeah, open doors and all that shit," Stark waived his hand dismissively. "I..."

He was interrupted by the sound of a small bell from his handheld computer that was laying on the dresser next to the bed. A message had appeared on the screen. Stark walked over to read it. Loki picked up a pair of black socks from the bed and unfolded them. 

"They found the Winter Soldier," Stark said reading the message over. "Apparently they destroyed half a block in the process, and the Secret Service has gotten involved. Anyway Clint says that Steve sends his thanks to you. Whatever you did helped them."

"I'm glad I could be at assistance," Loki carefully pulled on the shirt, it was quite comfortable. 

"Right," Stark was busy typing something on the computer. 

Loki took the opportunity to leave the room.

As he descended the stairs he caught sight of Darcy sitting by the table eating from a bowl. She gave him a smile with her mouthful and swallowed. 

"Mornin'" she said. 

"Sheildmaiden," Loki greeted as he sat down next to her pulling on the socks, they were a bit too small for his feet but they still covered his ankles were the trousers didn't reach down, he had come a far way from his usual standards in clothing in these past few months. "How are you fairing after your capture?"

"Pretty good actually," she put another spoonful in her mouth and chewed thoughtfully. "Being hugged by a big hot guy isn't the worst welcome I've ever had, even if he was green and naked. How are you?"

The two of them had built a tentative kind of companionship in which they both appreciated the other's kind of humour and temperance. It pained Loki somewhat to confess that if he would ever be looking for a friend in this realm he would look to her first. Not that he'd ever confess such a thing, and he doubted that she would say the same. 

"I am well," Loki looked around the kitchen. 

There were two large boxes on one of the workbenches. One had an image of a microwave and the other an image of a coffeemaker, most likely replacements for the ones Banner had destroyed last night. He wondered who had delivered them in the night without him hearing them from upstairs. 

"You don't look well," Darcy continued unrelentingly. "Are you still having nightmares?"

Loki had woken her several times in the night in their former quarters back in New Mexico. Loki shook his head, all dreams had thankfully eluded him this night, or at least any that he could remember. Usually he would dream of the things he wanted to forget but never could. He ignored her question for the search of food. 

"So, you and Tony Stark, huh?" she winked. "Didn't see you as the type."

"I'm not, but he is, so I'm complying." 

"You could say no, you know."

"I know, but magic brought us together. I believe it has a purpose."

Loki had found a large verity of teas in a cupboard, at least twenty different boxes of different flavours. He took a moment to stare at the electric kettle before looking back pleadingly to Darcy. She shook her head, rolled her eyes, and got up. He gave her a small smile as she took the kettle and filled it with water from the tap. 

"A purpose, huh?" she flipped a switch on the kettle and opened another cupboard to take out a cup for him. "So there's a purpose with what Dr. Banner and I got as well?"

"I believe so," Loki chose a red tea with vanilla that he decided smelled pleasant, he put the small bag in the cup. "You never told me what your Clarity was."

"Loneliness covers it fine," she sighed and leaned back on the worktop with a sad smile. "Luckily, I know I'm totally awesome and can rise above all that. But we can't all be as lucky as Stark."

"You bet your sweet ass I'm lucky," said Stark as he descended the stairs. "Not everyone can pull off looking this good."

His hair was artistically ruffled, he had shaved meticulously, and was wearing blue trousers and a similar shirt to the one he had lent to Loki, except this one had the words 'Black Sabbath' printed across the chest. Darcy whistled as Stark made a far to serious spin to display himself to them. 

"The others will be here with the Winter Soldier in about two hours," Stark gave his two new appliances look over and started unpacking the coffeemaker that Loki thought looked far too complicated for a machine which single purpose it was to prepare a hot beverage. "It gives us plenty of time to have a little chat."

"As you wish," Loki nodded. 

"Can I join?" asked Darcy. "I'm really good at chatting."

"I have no doubt," Stark laughed as he continued doing strange things to the machine. 

Darcy smiled back and filled up Loki's cup with hot water. The tea smelled quite nice as Loki breathed it in. He joined Darcy as she returned to the table and sat down. 

The elevator doors opened and Thor emerged, he was followed by Potts and a dark skinned man in uniform. Neither of them looked happy. Thor caught sight of Loki and looked even more grim. 

"Brother," he towered above Loki who pretend not to feel intimidated and sipped his hot tea. "I apologise for my temper last night. I was worried for my friend."

"Accepted," Loki bent his head since he was in no mood to argue. "How is Lady Jane?" 

"Resting, she is still weary from traveling."

"Good," said Stark pouring water into his precious machine. "I want everyone to be well rested for the party tonight."

"Party?" Potts sounded on the edge of exasperation. "What party?"

"Oh, hi, Pep. You didn't have to run and tell daddy, I was going to tell him myself."

"That you started a relationship with a massmurderer?" asked the uniformed man. "When were you going to tell me that?"

Loki shifted uncomfortably, who ever this man was he held great power over Stark, especially since he was given the epithet 'daddy', yet how sarcastically it was intoned. He glanced to Thor who seemed to be contemplating if he should be bashing the new man's head in or not. 

"Massmurderer is such a bad word, don't you think?" Stark hurried forward, much likely feeling the tension in the air. "We prefer 'temporarily insane with large hints of mind control', isn't that right, babe?" He nudged Loki nervously. "It's a bit of a mouthful, but there you have it. Loki, this is my best friend James Rhodes. Rhodey, this is my boyfriend Loki."

"What is he wearing?" 

"Clothes."

"They are your clothes."

"There was blood on his."

"Tony..." 

"Pardon me, sir," interrupted JARVIS. "You have a phone call from the New York police department. They are requiring the assistance of Iron Man."

"They..." Stark frowned like he didn't believe it. "They are? But they called me a vigilant and threatened to arrest me if I interfered in city business again."

That had been a fun day.

"Apparently they changed their minds, sir," JARVIS offered. "A bank in Newark has been bombed, the structural integrity of the building is comprised."

The television automatically turned on and an image of a smoking building was shown. There were people running around on the street. It reminded Loki slightly of the battle, he hoped no one else made the association, but they probably did. He tried to look inconspicuous.

"Well, it does seem like something I could help with," Stark was already walking towards the elevator. 

"I'm coming with you," said Rhodes. "You still have the old Iron Patriot?"

"Not so old any more, upgraded," smiled Stark before the door closed around them and cut the rest of their conversation off.

There was a moment of silence in the kitchen after they left, only a woman on the television reporting on the events was talking. Loki finished his tea, the red vanilla had been a good choice.

"Should I have gone with them?" asked Thor with a frown. 

"I'm sure they'll call you if they need back up," said Loki. 

The television continued to show images of the smoking building, Loki felt a bit at home in the chaos. Potts was rubbing her temples.

"What was that about a party?" she asked. 

"A party for Bruce," Darcy drank the last of her milk directly from the bowl. "He's feeling a bit down."

"He isn't the only one." 

"Do you want some coffee?" 

"Can you make it Irish?" Potts continued to rub her temples as she sat down at the table on the chair directly next to Loki's. 

"Sure thing," Darcy hurried over to the large bar at the other end of the room.

Loki looked her over. Should he say something? He should be trying to win her over. He had several smooth comments and explanations all lined up, but he wasn't sure that Potts would appreciate them. From what he had been told about her, she was a businesswoman of the highest sort, and she had been dealing with Stark for over a decade. Smoothness wasn't going to work with her. He almost jumped when she suddenly looked up and met his eyes, hers were light grey.

"I want it."

"What?" 

"The Clarity thing," she said. "I think I deserve a gift from you as well." 

"I..." 

Loki paused as the reporter announced that Iron Man and a similar armoured man were reported arriving to the scene. Darcy placed a mug topped with whipped cream from a can in front of Potts. He tried again. 

"The Moment of Clarity is... uncertain," he glanced to Darcy but she was looking at the television. "It has become clear to me that I have no control over if the outcome will be intellectual or emotional. And the emotional ones hasn't at all been what I expected. I prefer it if I can heal something instead, like I did with Romanoff and Barton."

Fine examples those gifts were, thought Loki. He was in Romanoff's servitude for the next nine months, and he would probably be plagued by Barton's demons for as long as the human was alive. 

"I have nothing that needs healing," Potts shook her head. 

Loki knew she was right. He watched her empty half her mug of alcoholic coffee. 

"Very well," he nodded. 

...


	7. Old friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony gets a talking to, and Loki has another gift to give.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some references to Agents of SHEILD in this chapter. For future reference I'm disregarding season 2 for this fic.
> 
> I'm Swedish with a Brittish vocabulary/knowledge of spelling trying to write American on a autocorrecting device, please excuse my mistakes.

Tony was sitting on a ledge of a roof across from the bank in Newark. There was a policecar stuffed upright like a plug into the building were the bomb had gone off and taken part of the bearing wall away. It was quite an ingenious solution, he thought. The NYPD hadn't been as pleased but had accepted it grudgingly. 

The bank building had been evacuated and the amateur robbers with lousy timing skills on their explosives were apprehended. A truck had arrived on the scene to start clearing away rubble. The workers were scratching their heads over the policecar patch-up. The fire trucks started to leave. 

Tony pushed away the visor of his helmet as Rhodey came to sit down next to him. The Iron Patriot wasn't as graceful as Iron Man when it came to sitting down, but then again that move had never been a priority. Rhodey let his visor up as well. 

"A bit disappointing this helping the law out thing," said Tony. "Not as much action as in vigilantism."

"Not everything can be supervillains," said his friend. "Speaking of which...?"

"It's not real, I'm only pretending so that I can get close to him. He's up to something and I'm going to find out what."

"Yeah, Pepper told me. "It's still messed up. That guy is messed up. And also, you told me you would stop having sex with men. You said that it was too complicated. "

"Uh," Tony shrugged dismissively. "One in ten give or take, I like keeping my options open. I love the ladies, but the tenth one hits the spot."

"You disgust me," Rhodey smiled as he shook his head. "You know what I meant."

"Sorry, yes, I do know," Tony wanted to rub his face but his gauntlet was in the way and the repulser was still hot from his impromptu welding. "Though you don't have to worry about that issue this time. Loki doesn't seem to want to have sex, he hardly even lets me touch him. It's actually quite frustrating now when I think about it. All my good moves are lost on him." 

"The great Tony Stark," smirked Rhodey. "Billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, and can't seduce a god even with the help of a fake magic spell."

"There are many kinds of seduction, my friend, and I'm a master of all of them."

"Yeah, right."

They looked down on the cleaning crew below. They, a few news reporters, and a few policemen were looking back up at them, one of them was pointing. Tony waived, some of them waived back. Rhodey rolled his eyes. 

"He's still quite powerful, isn't he? What would he do if he finds out you are lying to him?" 

"Probably kill me," Tony sighed. 

"Figured as much," Rhodey lowered his visor. "I have a staff meeting, I only came cause Pepper asked me to, and I wanted to se the updates on the suit. Saving a building and berating you on your love life was an added bonus."

"Are you coming to Bruce's pick-me-up party? About seven?"

"When are you going to stop throwing parties at problems?"

"Not today anyway."

The Iron Patriot made an exasperated head-tilt and then pushed himself off the roof, letting his boosters catch his fall and propelling him into the air. 

"I'll be there," he said over the comm as he flew away. "If only to pick up the pieces. Be careful."

"Ten-four, buddy," Tony put down his own visor. "JARVIS? Any news?"

The optics and close range holograms started up, measuring out his closest proximity and measuring out distances, showing statistics, and current levels of the suit's functions. Everything looked good. Tony emulated Rhodey's move, just because it had looked cool, and pushed himself off the roof. He set a course for the tower. 

"Sir, Captain Rogers has returned with Ms. Romanoff, Mr. Barton, and Sergeants Wilson and Barnes. They await you in the Hulk-cage room." 

"I really have to come up for a better name for that room. Green Slammer? Sounds like a drink. How's Bruce?"

"Awake, sir," JARVIS' calm voice said it all, Bruce was not happy with being drugged. 

"Any messages?"

"Miss Potts has left a message saying that she is taking the day off but will attend the party this evening. Miss Lewis has volunteered to assist with the preparations since you were too busy."

"And Loki?" Tony landed on the disassembly line on the top of the tower, mechanical arms started to remove the suit as he walked over it. 

"Resting, though Captain Rogers has requested for you to bring him with you."

Tony stepped inside the common room through the glass doors. He passed the bar and noticed Bruce sitting by the kitchen table eating toast. He looked up as Tony passed him for the benefit of the coffeemaker. Caffeine before bros, at least in circumstances like these. Tony had just saved a building, he deserved some coffee. 

"Saw you on TV," said Bruce in a voice that revealed he probably needed more sleep. "A policecar?

"You work with what you got," Tony shrugged as he filled the machine with water. "And a lesser known fact is that policecars are more enforced than normal cars, built to handle higher pressure. Something we can thank my dear old dad for. How's the shoulder?"

"Sore," Bruce grimaced as he rotated his arm. "How did Hill get a hold of of the syringe? I gave it to you, and only you, for safe keeping."

"Sorry," Tony grimaced back. "She was only to use it in case of extreme emergency. I think she panicked."

Bruce huffed and returned to his toast. There was a StarkPad on the table as well, seemingly showing different curves of measured radiations, but Bruce didn't seem too interested in it and that made Tony even less so. 

"Sir," said JARVIS. "Captain Rogers requests your presence in..."

"I know," Tony sighed. "Tell him to keep his shirt on, I haven't even had breakfast yet."

"Stark," Loki was descending the stairs. "I heard that you were back. Have you spoken to Miss Potts?" 

"Pepper? She took the day off. Is there anything wrong?"

"No," he shook his head. "At least I don't think so."

"What did you do?" Tony suddenly felt very uneasy. 

"Nothing she didn't ask of me," Loki crossed his arms and looked defiant. "Both Maid Darcy and Thor are my witnesses. 

Tony looked to Bruce but he only lowered his head, asking to be kept out of the drama. Traitor. 

"Fine," he breathed and poured himself some coffee in a large white mug with a Stark Industries logo printed on it in big silver letters. "Did she at least seem happy with what she got? Or is she like Bruce now? Do I have to throw her a party as well?" 

"'As well'?" Bruce looked up. 

"She seemed satisfied," Loki said holding Tony's gaze as if he challenged him to accuse him of anything. 

Tony did consider giving out some good accusing, but since he didn't really know Pepper's state of mind there was nothing really he could do. He just had to wait until the party, or ask Darcy and Thor about it. He planned to look at the security footage later as well. As for the moment he let Loki off the hook and turned back to Bruce who was still looking at him. 

"Yes, I'm throwing you a party," he took a few hot sips of the much longed for coffee. "Seven a clock, downstairs."

"Tony..." 

"No need to thank me. It's going to be a blast."

"Tony," repeated Bruce in a bit more sterner tone. 

"Oh! Look at the time," he looked to his empty wrist and hurried away towards the elevator. "Me and Loki has to go and take care of an brainwashed super soldier from the forties, can't stay to shoot the breeze. See you later."

He put a hand on Loki's arm as he passed and pulled him with him. Loki did not appreciate the manhandling but followed obediently as soon as he had shaken off Tony's hold. Bruce was still glaring at then when the doors closed. 

Loki leaned against the wall, his arms crossed. Tony admired his figure but felt weary. His concern for Pepper was still there, as well as for the rest of them. He wasn't still as sure there was any imminent danger, but there was danger nonetheless, he could see it in Loki's watchful eyes. 

They exited on the Green Slammer. Monster Hut? Bruce's Timeout Corner? Jolly Giant Retreat? Tony wished he was better at naming things. Which one would make most people cringe? He took another sip off his coffee. 

Only Steve and Wilson were there, if you didn't count the unmissable presence inside the cage. 

The Winter Soldier was as tall and as muscular as Steve, but had dark long hair and dark eyes that showed no sign of mercy. He was dressed in long black cargo pants and a simple black hoody. The most interesting thing that caught Tony's eye was the man's left hand sticking out of the sleeve, it was clenched and made of metal.

Loki walked straight up to the glass and started what seemed like a glaring contest. Tony walked over to Steve and Wilson.

"Nice to see you again," he shook Wilson's hand.

"Likewise, Mr Stark."

"Tony, please."

"Then call me Sam," he glanced to Loki. "Is he safe?"

"Hopefully," Tony grinned. "Now, what can we do for our prisoner?"

Steve was wearing his Captain America uniform, it made him look a bit more impressive. Tony still had a mixed childhood reaction of jealousy and awe every time he saw it.

"I don't know," Steve shrugged. "I was hoping you would have a suggestion. I've tried talking to him, but he doesn't seem to be recognising me." 

Tony shifted uncomfortably. He only had one idea, and it wasn't something that he thought Steve would agree on. To buy some time he turned to Loki.

"What do you think, babe?"

"He is in severe pain," Loki turned away from the man in the cage, he seemed saddened by his own words. "Both physical and mental. By his stance I would say that it's his left shoulder that bothers him the most."

"The metal arm," Tony nodded and brought up some holograms with his free hand not holding the cup. "From what I've gathered from footage, old files, and... other stuff, it's quite shoddy craftsmanship."

"Not that shoddy," said Sam looking over some footage playing midair of the Winter Soldier giving a small truck an uppercut. "Have you seen what he can do with that thing?"

"That's part of the problem," Tony moved some images around. "It's a tool, not a part of the body."

They watched some closeups roll by in different angles. JARVIS put up a couple of scans on the screens. Ultraviolet, electromagnetic, and gamma ray. It was obvious, even for a layman, that the arm was the problem. 

"Send these up to Bruce," Tony moved some of the images to a messenger. "Ask him if he thinks we could try Project Icecap." 

"Project what?" asked Steve with a suspicious frown. 

Loki smirked and returned to study the man in the cage. 

"It has nothing to do with you." Again Tony cursed his name giving imagination. "At least not directly. I want to take a closer look at that arm."

He looked away from his screens as the elevator doors opened and Clint exited. The man paused for a moment when he caught sight of Loki, who in his turn grimaced at the sight of Clint. Tony walked through the holograms to place his now empty cup on a secured table by the wall. He felt a bit uncomfortable over the exchanged look between them. 

"I found the tranquilliser," said Clint after a heartbeat, he suddenly seemed more relaxed. 

He was holding up a small one-handed crossbow with a pink dart attached. Steve shifted his stance and scratched his head. 

"I was hoping that Loki could try that thing on Bucky first."

Loki sighed. 

"I'm starting to have doubts about the Moment of Clarity. It reacts different to mortals, and I can't predict if the reaction will be intellectual or emotional. From what I know of this man, I don't think an emotional Clarity would be good for his psyche." 

"Alternatively..." said Tony who knew how the intellectual worked. "He could find a way to escape and break the tower."

"I still think it's worth the risk," insisted Steve. "If he got what I got..."

"Sir," interrupted JARVIS. "Based on the scans, Doctor Banner approves of Project Icecap. He's looking into preparations now."

"What is this about?" Steve insisted. "If it has anything to do with Bucky I must know."

"Well..." Tony braced for impact. "I got the Hydra-freezer-brainwash-machine."

It probably had a better name, but since he had no one of Hydra to ask Tony was left with his own crapy resources. The message had gotten across though, since Steve was turning red, and not the kind of red that matched with his uniform. Tony continued in a hopefully placating tone. 

"While Hydra and SHEILD had their little tiff," he cleared his throat, not really meeting anyone's eye. "Bruce and I kind of went in like a third party and like... rescued a bunch of stuff..." 

"You stole technology?" Sam smirked. 

"We rescued and recovered!" Tony corrected. "Hydra was stealing like crazy from SHEILD, SHEILD's security was shit, and Hydra abandoned several of their bases. We prevented a lot of stuff falling into the wrong hands. Including the freeze machine."

"Wait," Steve held up his hand. "What is it you want to do? You want to put him on ice again?"

The Winter Soldier could not hear them through the glass but still backed away, looking a bit apprehensive when Steve started talking. 

"Just while we fix his arm, he wouldn't want to be awake for that anyway," Tony took a breath and looked decisively to the Captain. "But if we fix the arm he will be even more a threat than he is now. It would be foolish to wake him if he can't be convinced to join your side." 

There was a heartbeat of silence. 

"I understand," Steve rubbed his face and sighed as well. "I still think Loki's spell is our Plan A."

"What's Plan B?"

Clint raised the tranquilliser as an answer to Tony's question. Steve gave a bitter and short nod in agreement. Loki turned away from the cage. 

"This would be the second part of your gift then, Captain. This man is one of the people on Midgard I do not owe for what I've done. Though I must confess, he will, if this succeeds, be a good ally to you."

Tony knew that tone of voice. Loki thought he would be a good ally to him as well. Was is because Loki counted himself as one of them in the future, or did he have another reason in mind? This was one of the things Tony had to find out. They hadn't had time for that talk earlier, and there was still some questions that needed to be answered. 

"All right," Steve agreed. "How do we do this? He's going to try to escape as soon as we open the door. Shall we call Thor?"

"I can manage," Loki huffed in indignation. 

"Are you sure?" Tony thought of the discoloured wound he had seen before.

"Do you doubt me?"

"Actually, I have a few concerns. Do you want me to list them?"

"Open the cage, Stark," Loki gave him a glare. 

Ultimately it was Steve's decision. He directed Tony to the console, gestured to Sam to stay back, and to Clint to be ready with the tranquilliser. Loki got in position in front of the door. Tony calculated that if he called his suit would take about eight seconds to arrive and three to fully assemble. Was it enough time not to be knocked out by a metal arm? 

Tony took a deep breath and put his hand on the console and let the light scan his palm. 

The Winter Soldier was out of the cage before anyone really could react, except for Loki who made a strange manoeuvre and managed to catch the man's head between his hands. He was pushed backwards by the force. Tony noted a grunt of pain but couldn't tell who made it. 

The next moment they both fell to the floor in a heap of long limbs and metal. Loki was on his back with the other man on top of him and between his legs. Tony noted to his dismay that Loki didn't seem that uncomfortable over the position, he was surprised by his sudden jealousy. Steve hurried forward and took the Winter Soldier in his arms like a hero on the cover of a romance novel. 

"How is he?"

"What did he get?" Clint was still steadily aiming the tranquilliser. 

Tony was curious as well, but forced himself to devote his first concern to Loki. Again there was blood on his shirt. Tony hurried over to the first aid kit by the door, he trusted JARVIS to alarm him if there was any danger. He hunched down next to Loki, taking a pad and pressing it to the skin under the shirt. Ice was cracking under his fingers, it felt strange. 

"I turned too fast," Loki gently scooted away Tony's hand and held on to the pad himself. "It's all right. Go look to him."

"Are you sure?" Tony glanced over to Steve who was still holding the other man in his arms.

Clint had lowered the crossbow slightly but still had a stance. Sam was curiously hovering behind Steve looking over his shoulder. 

Tony got to his feet and walked over. Steve was talking in a low voice, and another low voice was answering him. Something had worked, but it was unclear what it was. At least there wasn't any sign of a mental breakdown, Tony knew those when he saw them. Intellectual, then. What brilliant ideas was cursing through that damaged mind?

At least the fight seemed to have gotten out of him. Tony would feel much better if they could bring him to a place in the tower where there were more drugs, and restrains. 

"He recognises me," Steve looked up at Tony with tears in his eyes. 

"That's good," nodded Tony and got down to his knees. "Can we... Is it all right if we look at his arm? Can we take him to the infirmary?"

Steve nodded, he bent down and started whispering again. Tony turned to Clint. 

"Can you take Loki upstairs? He needs to rest."

"Why me?" whined Clint. 

"Because I'm asking you nicely? Sam is new here, and me and Steve needs to take care of this guy."

"Bucky," said Steve still looking into his friend's eyes. "Call him Bucky."

"Fine," Clint exasperated and handed the tranquilliser over to Sam who took it with a nod. "But only because I'm on my way upstairs anyway,"

He walked over to Loki who seemed to have gotten control of the bleeding. The Megadeath t-shirt was ruined. Tony wondered if alien bloodstains were harder to get out than ordinary blood.


	8. Surprises, and a dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki is tired, but it seems that rest is hard to get when you are him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I mostly write in a flow of consciousness it's hard to reconstruct the story, I hope it still makes sense.

Loki didn't feel good about being cared for by Barton, even if that care only extend to Barton pushing a button and grumpily accompanying him for the half a minute it took for the elevator to travel from the lower levels of the tower to the top floor. 

He was not feeling well, mostly from the wound in his side and the increasing headache he had taken on from Barton. He just wanted to undress, take a shower, and lay down for the rest of the day. 

The soldier had been draining, not the only because of the spell, but also because of the sheer strength of his attack. Loki had not been prepared for that. Underestimations seemed to be his downfall in so many areas. 

"I don't like you," said Barton. 

"The feeling is not entirely unmutual," Loki sighed. "Do you have a point?" 

"That was it."

"Fine then," Loki hadn't expected any acknowledgement of the fact that he was on taking Barton's pains, he wasn't sure if Barton even knew. "If you don't mind getting out of the way I'd like to take care of this."

Barton gritted his teeth and looked down on Loki's hand and the blood soaked pad. Loki waited for something to happen, hopefully Barton storming off. He could hear voices downstairs in the kitchen, it sounded like Romanoff and Thor. 

"Aahh," Barton exhaled in near anguish. "Fuck!"

He then turned abruptly and walked into Stark's bedroom. Loki followed hesitantly. Barton had gone straight for the closet and was now digging out a medical kit from one of the shelves. It made Loki wonder how often Stark got injured if his friends were so familiar to find the supplies. 

"Bandages, disinfectant," Baron held up some small packages. "I trust you know how to use them. There are more clean towels in here..."

"I can't use bandages," Loki said in a voice that was more disdainful than intended. "They will freeze to my flesh and cause even more harm when being removed." 

Loki had learned that the hard way. This injury was teaching him more about Frostgiant physiognomy than he ever wanted to know. Again he cursed the damn Svartalfheim blade and its effects on his own foreign flesh. 

"Let me see that."

Before Loki could stop him Barton had pushed away his hand and was looking at the wound. It was on its way to freezing over again. Barton frowned and then he made face of disgust, there were probably shades of colour there he had never seen on any kind of flesh before. It felt good, even though he was exposing himself, to make Barton uncomfortable. 

"Is that real ice?" 

"Yes," Loki grumbled. "And it's freezing wrong. I need a shower to melt it, so I can realign the edges for better healing."

"That is messed up," Barton stretched and met his eyes, not in sympathy but perhaps in understanding. 

"Tell me about it," Loki handed him the used up bloodied pad and headed for the bathroom.

"Uew! That's disgusting!"

Loki smirked. 

"Do..." Barton swallowed and looked even more uncomfortable. "Do you need help undressing?"

"No," Loki closed the door but not before hearing a murmured 'thank goodness'.

It was difficult, and a bit painful, to undress by himself, but Barton would be the last person, if any, that he would let help him. He shivered at the thought. 

The warm water felt good against his skin. Midgard's water system was superior to any realm, Loki could testify to that. In Muspelheim one would be extremely lucky to find a heated volcanic lake that didn't contain liquid sulphur. 

He could hear Barton moving about in the other room. He was talking to JARVIS a few times, but there was also a second, female, voice. Then it was quiet, they seemed to have left. 

Loki looked at himself in the mirror as he let the ice reform correctly over the wound. If he only could keep it safe from bursting for about a week, then he would be in good chance of it healing well. But since he hadn't been able to do that since he was inflicted by it, how was he expected to do it now? And with Barton's troubles adding on, it was not going to be easier. 

He wrapped a towel around his waist and stepped out into the bedroom again. Barton was gone but Jane was there. She was sitting by the desk and looking over a blueprint of what looked like one of Stark's body-armours on Stark's handheld computer. She smiled at Loki. 

She, like Darcy, had become a tentative friend, but because of her closeness to Thor Loki was more weary about her. Not that he didn't trust his sometimes brother, but he didn't trust him. The argument last night had only showed the thin line they were threading with each other.

He momentarily hesitated by the doorframe, not because he was embarrassed in her seeing his state of undress, but more the unease of showing her his injuries. But then again, he thought as he moved again, she was not the kind of person that would use someone else's weakness against them. She was not him. 

Also, she had been there when he revived them. 

"This is quite cool," she said, indicating the blueprint. "It's like a spacesuit and rocket in one."

"Does Stark know you are going through his things?"

"Probably," she shrugged and put the computer away. "He has cameras everywhere, you know."

"I'm aware."

Loki contained his instinct to look around himself in a challenging manner and headed for the bed where Barton had laid out a towel, the medical kit, and a change of clothing similar to what Loki had been wearing before. This time the shirt said 'slayer' and had an even more gruesome scull depicted, Loki wondered if Barton was trying to indicate something with the printed word, or if Stark's leisurewear was implicating some kind of inner turmoil in the man. Probably both. 

"How many Moments of Clarity have you done now?" Jane asked slowly.

"Seven," Loki blinked at the question. "Why?"

"Just curious," she moved her fingers in a way that seemed to be counting.

"What are you thinking?"

She shook her head and smiled sadly. 

"That doesn't seem to get any better," She rose from the desk and walked over to Loki. "Do you mind me helping you?"

At first Loki wanted to refuse her, but relented with a single shake of his head. Jane was a good ally, and a good mediate to Thor. She would also not touch him in a way he that he would feel too uncomfortable with. 

She looked over the discolouration of his skin and frowned. Since he was so much shorter than him (she only reached his collarbone), she didn't need to bend down so far to look.

"Are you okay?" 

"It will be fine," Loki sat down on the bed so she could help him on with the shirt. "How are you? You fainted last night, and you have slept longer than usual today."

"I'm just tired from the travel," Jane smirked at the text on the shirt. "A bit overworked as well... You know us astrophysicists, up all night watching stars and then up all day reading data..."

Loki placed a hand on her abdomen. He knew it was forward and he didn't like doing it one bit, but it was the only way to stop her from continuous rambling. 

Their eyes met. She bit her lower lip. Without saying anything she took his hand and brought it under her blue knitted sweater to her skin. Loki could feel the strong energy emerging from her womb, it was fresh and ancient at the same time. He moved his hand to feel it more closely. About two weeks, Loki guessed. 

"Don't tell Thor," Jane whispered. 

"I won't..." Loki frowned and placed his other hand on her skin as well. "There's two of them."

"Christ," Jane backed away and smoothed down her sweater. "Isn't that just what I need?" 

Loki folded his hands on his lap. 

"This is an unforeseen development. There have't been children like these for over a millennia, so the odds of me being able to foresee it are pretty low."

"Why so long ago?" Jane was holding her hands protectively over her stomach. "The frequent use Bifrost lasted up to the late twelve-hundreds. Were there any complications with the children?"

"Opposite, in fact," Loki smirked. "Some of them became great warriors, some even better than their non-human parent. I was no more than child myself at the time, even by your standards, but I remember Odin being very upset about that, so he forbade more to be made."

Loki pulled his fingers back through his hair. Any child of Thor's would definitely precede Loki in the court of Asgard. For the moment Loki didn't care, he even thought it petty to do so. For the moment. But what if the future? He watched Jane folding and unfolding a towel. She must have a lot to think of as well. 

He thought of Stark's words of him being an alien. He didn't know much of Midgardian culture, but he guessed that being pregnant with two alien babies would be seen as quite strange. Also, Jane was a small woman and Thor a large man, she would at least be needing to spend the two last months of the gestation in bed. 

Loki predicted that he soon was to get his second assignment as a midwife. 

"Doctor Foster," announced JARVIS. "Mr. Stark is requesting your assistance in his laboratory. He has managed to detach the arm of the Winter Soldier and thought you might be interested."

"Absolutely," Jane grinned in excitement. "Tell him I'll be right there." She turned back to Loki. "Please, let's keep this between us for now?"

"As you will, my lady," Loki bowed his head. 

"See you at the party," she smiled and hurried out of the room. 

Loki lay back on the bed. There were a few new things to consider. He didn't have time for considering any of them, as soon as the back of his head touched the mattress he was asleep. 

_found you_  
no  
you can't fight me  
you are dead  
you still can't hide from me  
leave me be

He awoke with a curious feeling of not having slept at all, even though there was a distant memory of a dream haunting him. The daylight outside the windows were also dimmer than before. His muscles felt sore as if he had constantly clenched them. His mind was surprisingly well rested and clear, almost like after a deep meditation. His headache was but an echo of something worse. It left him with an uneasy mood. 

"Hi there, Sleepyhead," Stark exited from the bathroom while drying his hands on a towel. "I was just about to wake you. Party's on in five minutes and I'm sad to say pants are required. Not that I mind, but some of the others might object."

Loki looked down on himself. He had the 'slayer'-shirt on but was still only wearing the towel around his waist. It had loosened a bit and was showing off his entire left thigh. 

"I swear I didn't sneak a peak," Stark smirked and held out the trousers that Loki had arrived in yesterday morning, they were washed clean from blood. "I should be getting a medal for withstanding such temptation."

"You want to be rewarded for being decent?" Loki got up and pulled some underwear on under the towel before taking the trousers. "That sounds more like a blackmail for not being ravished."

Stark blinked, then he laughed. 

"I'm being lectured in decency by the supervillain God of Mischief," he shook his head. "By the way, your little gift to Bucky was indeed intellectual. That's the good news, the bad news is that it took away all the brainwashing he has received in the last seventy years. They guy remembers everything."

"Can't be good," Loki remembered the long stare of the man in the cage, that wasn't a soul at ease. 

"It's not," Stark put on a grey jacket over his blue shirt with the word 'Ramones' written across the chest. "Bruce and I had to put him on ice. We hope if we can fix his arm, the lack of pain could make him feel better. We were hoping you could help with healing some of the scars, Thor said you were good at that."

"He did, did he?"

Thor had seen how Loki had healed Coulson. About three quarters of severe scar tissue could be restored from damaged skin if one had the skill. For trained healers it was quite basic, for Loki who had only marginally studied healing magic it was more difficult. He had exhausted his experience and knowledge while working on Romanoff. Thor knew this, and still he chose to brag about Loki.

"The arm is interesting though," Stark continued as he tied his shoes, Loki had socks. "Hydra technology of course, which means that it was stolen from all over the place. There are even some of my father's handiwork in there. Just like in the icebox, I'll show it to you tomorrow. I love your hair by the way, very crazy genius."

Loki hurried over to the wardrobe mirror. His hair was a wavy mess standing about everywhere. He had fallen a sleep with wet hair from the shower, brushing it now would only be worsening it. Loki sighed at his reflection. The hair, the clothes, and the human betrothed. How the mighty had fallen. 

"Don't worry, babe," Stark stood behind him, just barely managing to look over his shoulder and meeting his eyes in the mirror. "You look very sexy."

"I'm not worried," Loki tried to push his hair back with some magic but it was not willing to be tamed. "I'm not the one throwing a party for a group of people who most likely aren't in a party mood."

"Never stopped me before," Stark led the way out of the room and to the elevator. "I am the party master and people are going to have fun if they like to or not."

"I admire your high confidence," Loki watched him press the button of the floor beneath the common room floor. "I just hope that you don't fall from that hight."

"I have invented a very cool suit that catches me when I fall," Stark smirked confidently as the door opened. "Once, I was thrown out of a window by a madman and it worked perfectly. Remember me to tell you about it some time."

Loki gave him a perfected glare that had put mightier men to their knees. It didn't work on Stark. 

 

.....


	9. Party time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony gets to know some hard truths, maybe it's just what he needs.

Tony was seriously bummed out when he stepped into the room. Darcy had done a great job with the self serving bar, walking snack table, and subtle the ambiance, including decorations, lights, and music, but the guests were seriously not making an effort. He was most disappointed at Bruce who he almost walked into as the man tried to sneak out. 

"Where you going?" Tony threw his arm over his friend's shoulders to turn him around. "The party is just getting started!"

"I'm not really..." Bruce sighed as he let himself be pushed towards the bar. "You know I'm not allowed alcohol."

"Only by your own rules, party pooper."

Clint was already there, he was alternatively switching between drinking a drink of his own and mixing another. He smiled at Tony and Bruce as they arrived. He raised an eyebrow at the sight of Loki. 

"Hey, what's up with the hair?"

Loki glared murderously at him and walked away. 

"He's just trying on a new style," Tony hurried to say and looked over the table. "What are you up to?"

"I'm trying to find out a good non-alcoholic mix for Nat," he said. "She is sulking because she can't have any vodka."

Tony looked over to one of the sofas where Natasha was talking to Sam Wilson. She seemed amicable enough, but who knew what was brewing beneath the trained surface. Steve was standing next to them, typically moping. Nor far away Loki was examining the snack table, it was understandable if he was hungry. Tony smiled. 

"Make that two," he told Clint. "Bruce needs a pick-me-up."

"Coming up," Clint smelled a bottle with something very blue in it, poured it into a glass with something yellow, and made a small excited woop when it turned green. 

Bruce managed a genuine smile, though be it a bit sad. 

Tony poured himself a scotch, pleased to see that Darcy hadn't skimmed on quality. There were plenty of beverages to go around. There were even a pair of wooden barrels of mead standing next to the bar. 

Darcy was currently talking to Pepper. Both were holding organge-red drinks. Tony wanted nothing more than to go join them, but he wasn't drunk enough not to notice the air of serious privacy with the two women were talking. Actually, he wasn't drunk at all, he took a large gulp of his glass to remedy that. 

He had watched the security feed of Pepper getting her Clarity from Loki. She had looked a bit shocked at first but then gracefully calm. She had left right away, Thor and Darcy had tried to talk to her, but she had assured them that she was perfectly fine. Loki had stood back with a neutral face. In the elevator down she had several tears streaming down her face but still smiled bravely up into the camera. 'Don't worry', she had said while drying her eyes. 

It had seemed like an invasion of her privacy to follow her on the traffic cameras outside the Tower. Tony had just watched her car leave the garage. 

The elevator doors opened and Thor and Jane entered. Thor made a happy roar that made everyone look his way. Jane mostly looked embarrassed. Loki rolled his eyes and returned to placing small pieces of food on a plate. Thor was heading for Clint who closely resembled a small deer caught in the headlights of a sixteen wheeler truck. 

"We shall bathe in mead to celebrate your child, my friend," Thor bellowed far to loud for a room only containing eleven people. "We shall serenade your bride in the fashion that deserves a warrior mother-to-be!"

Tony heard Nat swear in Russian. Clint just grinned. Tony now knew what the barrels were for. So did Thor because he wasn't late in opening up the tap on the closest one, pouring himself a large jug of golden liquid, and then dispensing it over Clint's head. 

"Son of a..." splurted Clint as he began to laugh. "And to think I changed my shirt for this."

"To the health of your child!" Thor boomed with laughter and poured the jug anew. This time he just gave it to Clint. 

Tony took the opportunity to refill his glass to a double. Bruce scattered off to the sofa with one green drink in each hand, and give one to Natasha. She looked somewhere between annoyed and amused as Thor made Clint chug the whole jug. 

It was strangely reminiscent of a bachelor party Tony accidentally attended once a few years back when he still invited himself to other people's parties. He had somehow ended up paying for the entire wedding and honeymoon, how that had happened was still a mystery to his accountants. 

He glanced over to Loki who was intently staring at Jane across the room. How was one supposed to move forward in a relationship without touching? Loki was obviously attracted to Tony, because why wouldn't he be? But was the alien only filling up his part of a bargain that was the lie of Tony's gift? If Tony hadn't lied about the Clarity and just tried seducing Loki, would it had worked?

These were not so much conversation topics that belonged to a party, but they warranted further investigation. Exactly why he needed to get closer to Loki and win his trust. 

Tony decided go talk to him. He refilled his own drink and poured another one for Loki. Thor was forcing a second jug of mead on Clint who was beginning to look a bit unsteady, but he was still laughing so it seemed all right for now. Tony had programmed JARVIS with an algorithm that he had aptly named 'tell me before anyone hurls on the carpet', it had saved many a get-together. 

"I don't think I can do this," said Steve coming up to him. 

"Do what?" Tony could have rolled his eyes over the dramatic tone but refrained from doing so. 

"This party," Steve sighed. "Bucky's downstairs, alone, frozen, without an arm!"

"Tell me," Tony made another mental eye-roll. "What can you do about it? We can't unfreeze him, he's confused and in pain, he's better off sleeping. The best you can do is sit on a chair in the lab next to the machine and look sad."

"I know but..."

"Here," Tony gave him the extra glass of scotch. "Drink this."

"You know I can't."

"Yes you can, you're neither pregnant nor Bruce. Drink it like you can get drunk. Go learn some serenades from Thor, teach Darcy to do the Lindy Hop or what ever, when Rhodey gets here tell him about growing up in the thirties, try to convince Sam to let me look at his wings, eat some tiny finger food. Relax and have some fun, Cap. If not now, you are going to regret it later."

Steve just looked at him for a moment. Tony grinned up at the taller man. Then Steve gave a nod, swallowed down the drink in one go, and turned to join Thor and Clint who welcomed him with a cheer. Tony felt very pleased with himself. 

Next in line to occupy Tony's short walk towards Loki, who was doing a very good job pretending not to eavesdrop on Nat's, Sam's, and Bruce's conversation, was Jane. 

"I know you are lying to him," she said in a low accusatory voice. "And don't lie to me, I find out patterns for a living."

"What do you mean?" Tony felt his throat restrict somewhat, he took a swig at his glass.

"The Moments of Clarity," Jane moved so conspiratorially close that Tony had to bend down a little. "They are every other. Me, intellectual. Darcy, emotional. Then you. Bruce got emotional and Steve got intellectual. Pepper, emotional and now Barnes, intellectual."

"Pepper got emotional?" Tony hissed, feeling even more worried than before. 

"Don't change the subject, Stark," Jane pointed at his chest, tapping the reactor. "I saw your blueprints of the spacesuit. You are lying to Loki and thereby putting us all in danger. He is an mentally unbalanced time-bomb. Trust me, I lived with him for a month." 

"I need to get close to him, don't you see? We need to know what his hiding from us."

"How did you plan to accomplish that? He doesn't like being touched, and very suspicious to kindness." 

"Well, I didn't know all that then, did I?" 

She sighed and rubbed her forehead. 

"You want to know his secret? You want to know my guess? He got seriously fucking hurt. Excuse my language, but there it is. He got hurt by those he cared for and those who used him. Mentality, physically, and spiritually. He has a plan, ten plans even, but I don't think anyone of them is going to hurt us. Not in a catastrophic sense anyway. But if he finds out that you lied to him about something like this..."

"He won't," Tony emptied the rest of the glass. "He won't."

"He better not." 

Jane gave him a stern look before walking over Darcy and Pepper who seemed to have finished their serious talk. Tony exchanged a look with Pepper and decided that their conversation could hold out for a few minutes more. He opted to refill his glass. 

Rhodey and Hill arrived, both dressed in casual civilian clothing. Hill glanced at Bruce, she must still be nervous about putting a tranquilliser in his shoulder. Bruce didn't look too friendly either when he saw her. Luckily, both Hill and Rhodey were caught by Thor insisting that they too should toast the expectant father.

Tony finally managed to make his way to Loki and give him a vodka and tonic. 

"How you doin'?" he said as he offered the glass to him. 

"The small spicy sausages wrapped in bacon are quite tasty," Loki carefully tasted the drink and licked his upper lip. "You talked to Jane, she seemed adamant."

"She basically gave me the shovel talk," Tony smirked at Loki's blank look. "She metaphorically threatened to dig me a shallow grave should I hurt you."

"Oh," Loki seemed strangely touched at this. "How nice of her."

"Yeah," Tony felt a bit uncomfortable and cured it with emptying his glass. "Do you want to dance? It's not a party if no one dances."

Loki hesitated. Tony smiled. 

"We don't need to hold each other. There are plenty of dances were we just hold hands. Or not at all if you want, but that is mostly jumping around and not do dignified."

"I'm not that sensitive of a flower that I can not hold your hand for the duration of a dance," Loki sighed with a reluctant smile. 

"Never thought you were," Tony held out both of his hands. "How about both?"

"Pushing it," Loki looked mischievous but still put his hands in Tony's. 

They spun around a few times before finding a steady beat to follow. The music was an eclectic mix, sounding like a automatic playlist based on a broad-tasted collection of music. The current song was a shake from the sixties. Loki seemed to enjoy it and did a good job in keeping up with Tony's haphazard lead. He even laughed out loud when Tony tried an underarm routine and failed because Loki hadn't ducked in time. 

Tony thought about what Jane had said about Loki, how she believed he had been hurt. It made him feel uneasy. Was his pretending doing more harm than good? He wished he had gone into this thing with a little more information. 

He was pulled away from his thoughts when he caught of Steve dancing with Hill. Tony wasn't sure if it was the Lindy Hop, but what did he know? Anyway it had some very fancy footwork. Hill was surprisingly the more talented one but Steve did good work keeping up. It almost looked like he had been taking lessons. 

As the music changed to something more jazz sounding, they were joined on the floor by Sam and Nat, and Rhodey and Pepper. Darcy was trying to convince Bruce to dance with her, he was shyly shaking his head, but the girl was nothing but persistent and managed to get him where she wanted. 

Tony felt Loki relax as the two of them no longer were the only dancers in the room. Tony glanced over at Pepper, he really needed to talk to her and find out if she was okay. 

"It's all right," nodded Loki who of course noticed. "I don't mind."

Bruce excused himself from Darcy, blaming that his heart rate was going up. A cheap cope-out in Tony's book, since Bruce could have managed two more dances in this pace before being in danger of hulking out. Darcy seemed a bit disappointed but started looking around for another dance partner. Tony guided Loki to her. She was surprised but took it in a good stride when Loki offered her his hand. 

Tony walked over and tapped Rhodey's shoulder, his friend obliged to hand Pepper over without hesitation before heading towards the bar. 

"Hello," Tony placed his hand on the side of Pepper's waist, not the hip, nor the back, he was going to be a gentleman. 

"Hi," she smiled. 

"I know that smile," Tony sighed. "You are going away, aren't you?"

"Only for a short while," she nodded. "To think."

"About me?"

"Anything but you actually."

"What do you mean?" He frowned, in a silly way, like the concept of not thinking about him was absurd, which it was. 

"You know," she looked over his shoulder out of the window behind him. "The entire time I've worked for you I haven't had a single vacation that haven't been interrupted by something you have done."

"That can't be true," Tony tried to think. "What about that time in Antibes?" 

"I got three days because I dropped my phone in the pool, then I saw you on the front page of the newspaper getting caught with some woman's leg around your head."

"I don't remember that."

"What a surprise," she rolled her eyes and met his again. "Anyway, I'm going on a vacation. I'm not telling you were I'm going, and I'm not bringing my phone." 

"Did Loki make you want a vacation?" Tony frowned again but this time with more genuine confusion.

"No," she shook her head. "He made me realise that I have to stop revolving my life around you." She smiled sadly. "I love you, Tony, I really do. But frankly, you are a pain in the ass, you are bad for me, and I need to get away from you."

Tony gaped. It stung in his heart that he knew it was true. He looked around, amazed that the party was still going on around him. Clint was swinging Natasha in a way that would seem dangerous for anyone but them. Steve and Hill were teaching Thor how to dance. Sam was dancing with Jane. Rhodey and Bruce were stocking up by the snack table. Loki and Darcy were standing by the bar mixing something toxic-looking with the help of the very blue blue bottle. 

He tried to feel resentment against Loki for what Pepper just told him, but he knew far too well that this was his own fault. It had started long before Iron Man was a glimmer in his eye. What Loki had done was to bring it out in the open. Pepper kept on talking as they moved across the floor to the music he no longer listened to.

"When I come back, after my full vacation, I'm going to do my job as CEO of Stark Industries. I've talked to Darcy Lewis, she will be taking over as your personal assistant. She is inexperienced but she is smart, willing to learn, and she already has inside knowledge of the Avengers." She gave him a threatening look. "Be nice to her."

"I..." Tony felt a loss for words, when was the last time that happened? "But you cried, in the elevator."

"Yeah," Pepper took a deep breath. "I can't believe I'm saying this. But now I understand why Loki believes you when you say the Clarity made you realise that you like him. I felt the truth behind it. And I know this is useless to say to you, but, please be careful."

She pecked his cheek before letting go of him. 

"Thank you for a lovely party. I'm leaving now. Happy is waiting downstairs with the car to take me to the airport."

Without further ado she left. 

Tony had a panicked thought of letting JARVIS trap her inside the elevator so that she would miss her flight, but let it go. He was a forty-five year old man, not a toddler, and he needed another drink. 

As he poured his double scotch he looked around the room. His eyes were drawn to Bruce. The man was sitting alone on a leather sofa staring down at his phone with a sad smile. Tony thought about Pepper's words, about the truth of the Clarity. Bruce was lonely, no party could fix that. 

He took his drink and walked over to his friend, the first warmth of alcohol was tickling his cheeks. Bruce gave a weak smile as Tony sat down next to him. He was surprised to see that the picture on the phone wasn't Betty Ross, now Mrs Psychiatrist, the long lost girlfriend, but a black and grey dog of the distinguished breed of mutt. 

"Cute," Tony took a sip of his drink. 

"His name is Morreu," Bruce smiled fondly. "He was my dog in Brazil when I hid there."

"That was a long time ago," Tony frowned. "How did you find him?"

"Your money can work wonders," he put away the phone. "By they way, you are the proud sponsor of the largest animal shelter in São Paulo."

"Is it tax-deductible?" Tony joked. 

"Probably," Bruce smiled. "Pepper left?"

"She had somewhere to be," Tony sipped his glass again. "Look, I'm not going to force you to stay here. If you want to go..."

"And do what?" Bruce gave a small laugh. "Sit and mope in my room? Monitor Barnes in the freezer? The surgeon you called for won't arrive to New York until tomorrow noon at the earliest. Anyway it's nice here. There's good food and I can watch people I care about enjoy themselves."

"It doesn't go just one way, you know. We care about you as well."

"I know," said Bruce taking Tony's glass from him and pouring the contains of it over into his own boring juice. "That's what's makes this so hard. How can I feel so lonely when I'm surrounded by all of you? What is wrong with me?"

He took a large gulp of his newly mixed beverage and cringed. Tony wasn't expecting some Mr Hyde appearance just over a drink, but felt a bit nervous none the less. He had never seen a Bruce like this. 

"Give me that," Tony took Bruce's glass. "Leave the heavy drinking to the experts."

"I want to ask Loki to try me again," Bruce looked over at Loki who was glaring at Thor who was teasing him over his hair. "Do you think he has a guarantee policy? If I got an idea, like you or Jane, maybe I could keep myself distracted from my feelings." 

"Maybe," Tony emptied the glass, it wasn't half-bad. "But you have to wait one more turn." He sighed. "Jane figured out that the Clarity is every other, emotional and intellectual. Bucky got the intellectual one, if she is right then next will be emotional."

Bruce blinked. He counted on his fingers. 

"She might be right, too small a sample to be sure though. Is Loki aware of the sequence?"

"No," Tony shook his head. "But the more times he does it, he will figure it out."

"And then he know you lied."

"I got an idea to fix that," Tony leaned back as he watched Steve and Hill take to the dance floor again but now with respectively Darcy and Rhodey as partners. "I'm going to ask for a do over as well. I'll get the emotional one, then say it was intellectual, and pull out some old idea and say it's new. Win-win."

"You can't do that!" Bruce protested. "You can't even be sure what you are going to get. You can become like me, or realise that you are an grown child with father-issues that replaces real feelings with with expensive toys and physical pleasures."

"Wow, you don't know me at all, do you?" Tony gave him a hurt look. 

Bruce shrugged. 

"Excuse me, sir," JARVIS interrupted. "But I believe it's time for Mr. Barton to seek up the bathroom."

"No way!" screamed Clint from where he was sitting on the floor building strange small constructs from toothpicks and popcorn. "I don' nee to."

Tony rolled his eyes at Bruce. 

"Come on, big boy. I wouldn't want to send you a bill for deep-cleaning my carpet."

Clint's eyes widened. Natasha was already walking towards him with an amused smile on her lips. 

"Stupi' carpet," Clint got to his feet. "I know wha' to do." He avoided being caught by Nat who wasn't really trying to catch him. "Hey! Loki!"

"What?" Loki snapped and turned to look at him. 

The next moment Loki wobbled and started to dry-heave. 

"Sir," said JARVIS. "It is time for Loki to visit the bathroom."  
Hill was the only one with presence of mind to actually grab Loki and rush him towards the toilets. He made no protest and almost leaned on her for support. Darcy followed them closely.

"Huh," Clint stretched, he seemed completely sober. "It worked."

"What was that?" Tony rushed forward. "What just happened?"

"I too would like to know," said Thor. 

"I suspected something was up," Clint looked at his hands as checking his control over them. "But I wasn't sure... It's like every time I feel bad, hurt, or something, I look at him and he takes it on."

"He takes it on?" Natasha breathed. "I thought he just took them away."

"I thought so too," Clint frowned. "This is just freaky."

Hill came out of the toilet looking a bit queasy. 

"How is he?" asked Tony. 

"Drunk," said Hill walking towards the bar. "As I need to be to forget that I ever held his hair back."

Tony could only imagine, he was also a bit irritated that he hadn't been the one doing it. Jane sighed. 

"He's already severely injured," she said. "This can't be good for him. Thor, you need to get him to bed."

"Of course," Thor nodded. 

"I can do it," Tony held up his hand to stop him and started moving towards the toilets. "I believe it's my duty as holder of the boyfriend-status. Carry on with the party, I will return to check your progress and grade you according to best party mood. No cheating."

Tony just had a brilliant idea. 

.....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to see how I imagine the spiral staircase between Tony's floor and the common room you can look here: 
> 
> http://naturegirlrocks.tumblr.com/post/117240388810/multiplefangasms-how-i-imagine-part-of-the


	10. Interlude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki is drunk and Tony takes advantage of it. Though you should never count on the god of mischiefs to behave.

It had been centuries since Loki had been this intoxicated. He felt the room spinning as he followed Stark into the elevator.

"I'm going to ask for your forgiveness in the morning, babe," said the mortal. "But this opportunity is too good to pass."

"I'm no-," Loki hiccuped. "I'm not going to let you take advantage of me."

"What kind of man do you take me for?" Stark shook his head in a way that made Loki more dizzy. "I'm one of the good guys, remember? I just want to take some scans, and maybe a blood sample or two." 

The elevator doors opened, but they were not on the common room floor. Instead they were walking out into what looked like a large mechanical workshop. Loki was impressed, until he smacked his head onto a wall of glass. 

"Careful," Stark laughed. "You'll break your head before you break this."

Loki doubted it, but still backed away, rubbing his nose. He watched trough the glass as a robot started to move. It resembled a large metal arm with three opposing claws for a head. It was hard to focus on it. He looked at Stark who was typing a code into a blue light-grid on the glass. 

It flashed red. 

"Come on!" Stark hit the glass. "JARVIS!"

"Sir, your hand-eye coordination is off by twelve percent."

"JARVIS! I'm not drunk! I only had like two glasses."

"Please blow in the bag, Sir."

Loki frowned as Stark swore in his insufficient human way and walked over to the outer wall. There was a kind of a muzzle perturbing there. The robot on the other side seemed very interested in what was going on, almost like it was sentient. It would have been more fascinating if Liki had more control over himself and his senses, especially his balance. 

Stark took a deep breath and blowed into the muzzle, it looked quite amusing. Loki wanted to do it too. 

"Oh point forty-six permille," said the mechanical servant as part of the glass wall opened. "By a hair, Sir. You may enter."

"Ha!" Stark laughed. "Told you!" He patted the robot lovingly. "Hi, Dummy, have you been a good boy?"

"Only because you raised the level to point five behind Miss Potts back, Sir."

"We both now I can work through one point two."

Loki had no idea what they were talking about. He staggered as royally as he could over to the muzzle and put his mouth against it. Blowing was harder than he remembered, it made a strange farting noise that sounded very funny. 

"Nine point seventy-four permille," said the mechanical servant. "Malfunction."

"What's that mean?" Loki tried to narrow his eyes, he managed to close them. 

"That you'd be dead several times over if you were human," Stark gently took his hand and lead him into the workshop. "Clint couldn't have given you more than one point five at the most. Do you have anti-freeze instead of blood or something? Dummy, stand down. He's a friend."

The robot made some beeping sounds as it closed in on Loki with a lens mounted on the claw-head. Loki found it endearing and smiled back at it. There were more strange sounds, excited ones. 

"He likes you," said Stark. 

He was standing over a workbench looking over holograms of green and blue numbers scrolling passed him. On the workbench lay the metal arm that once had been attached to the soldier in the cage. It was wrapped in a spider-net of wires, cords, and transmitters. It was shiny. 

"Sit down over there," Stark motioned towards a very worn down brown sofa. "I'm going to get some equipment."

Loki didn't care to be ordered around, but since he wanted to sit down anyway be moved towards the sofa. The robot was following him like a devoted puppy, if it had a tail to wag it would have wagged it. Loki patted the claw-head. 

It was a beautiful construction. 

Stark returned with a small tray, there were several things on it that Loki thought ominous, mostly the syringe. 

"I told you not to worry," Stark smiled at him. "Look into my eyes."

Loki tried to focus through the dizziness and the distraction of shiny things. It was going pretty good if he had to say so himself. Stark had a few freckles on his nose. 

"I'm only doing this because you are in an altered physical state," Stark continued. "If we can learn more about how your body works, maybe we can help you heal faster. Wouldn't you like that? If you don't want it when you sober up I'll destroy the samples. I promise."

"You know," Loki leaned forward to reveal a secret to Stark. "It was fun."

"What?" 

"The party, it was fun."

"Glad you thought so," Stark pressed something to Loki's right temple that got stuck there. "Relax, this will measure your brain waives, it just going to take a moment."

"Do you want to know a secret?" Loki asked the robot. 

"Dummy loves secrets," said Stark. 

The robot said nothing, but Loki felt he had a confidant in it. 

"I miss having fun. I always have to be nice now, and it's boring."

"We can have fun," Stark took the thing away from Loki's temple. "I'll take you to the zoo or Rockefeller Plaza, or something. Any more secrets you would like to tell Dummy?"

"A dead monster talks to me in my dreams."

"Okay, creepy. Is he giving you orders or...?"

"Not any more," Loki sighed and then looked at Stark more closely again. "I like you, human. Even if you are human and will die very soon."

"Right..." Stark cleared his throat. "And how very soon is that?"

"About half a century," Loki sighed. "But I will stay with you until then, because I like you."

"Right," Stark breathed. "I need a drink."

"Sir," said the mechanical servant, scaring Loki only a little because he wasn't prepared for it to talk. "I will have to inform you that if you supersede the oh point five permille limit, the lab will go into lockdown."

"I don't care," Stark walked over to a cupboard and took out a bottle. "A super-hot alien male who doesn't like to be touched just told me he wants to spend the rest of my life with me. I really need a godamn drink right about now."

Loki watched Stark drink directly from the bottle. He wondered if it was because anything he had said. The robot beeped. It was holding a paper cup of water out to him.

"Thank you, Dummy," Loki took the water and drank it as he contemplated the robot. 

A feeling of mischief suddenly bubbled up inside him. Why couldn't he have a little fun? He had deserved it, being this nice for so long. Also, the robot deserved something too. Loki was convinced that it too had suffered in some way under his forced attack of the city. Poor innocent shiny creature. So shiny. 

"Come here," he held out his hand towards the robot, it beeped and came closer. 

Loki placed his hand on the claw and spoke the Moment of Clarity. The last thing he remembered before loosing consciousness was a loud bang, Stark swearing, and something smelling like it was burning.

 _he is lying to you  
no  
you are weak to think anyone cares  
you are dead  
i can still still find you  
leave me be_

The pain of waking up almost made it worth trying to pass out again. Unfortunately Loki didn't have that luxury because of the woman sitting by his feet. 

He was on a beaten down sofa in a strange laboratory, and Natasha Romanoff was staring at him in a unsettling way. 

"What?" 

"I don't like you," Romanoff got to her feet. 

"I will bare it through."

"He's awake," Romanoff called across the room. 

Loki had little recollection of what had happened before passing out. He did remember something burning though. Had he put something on fire? That sounded more like something Thor would do. He sat up on the sofa, there was a sudden pain in his gut as he moved, his head hurt, and a recollection of a unpleasant dream tugged at his mind. 

He was still wearing the same clothes, and he didn't even want to know the state of his hair. 

"How long have I been asleep?"

"About ten hours," Romanoff shrugged. "More than most of us got. I don't think Tony slept at all."

"Loki?" 

Stark was coming towards him. The man was wearing a oil-stained sleeveless shirt showing off equally stained arms. A pair of strange thick dark glasses were pushed up to his forehead. His eyes were indeed the ones of someone staying awake all night. 

Loki smiled but the man didn't respond. Something was definitely wrong. 

"You blew out every single circuitry in Dummy! Every single one!"

"I did?" 

"Yeah! What the hell did you do to him?"

"I..."

Loki looked around the room. Both Romanoff and Jane was standing a few steps behind Stark. He could see no one else, which was good. If Thor, or Rogers, or even Banner, had been there it had been a sign that they saw him as a threat. As for now they were just angry with him. What had he done? 

"I had to break apart two of my suits to get all the spare parts," Stark gestured to two broken down armours on a large table further off. "You have been asleep for almost ten hours and he's still rebooting!"

"I apologise," Loki got to his feet, though his abdomen revolted and made him sit down again. "I was not myself."

"Or maybe you were exactly yourself," said Romanoff with narrowed eyes, but then she relaxed and sighed. "You need to take what ever connection you have with Clint away."

"But it was his gift..."

"Take it away," she growled. "You are literally making it worse for yourself."

"Very well," Loki sighed. "Where is he?"

"Hungover," Stark laughed. "After we left last night he started over on the drinking. You are not allowed to meet and restore him until he's better, nor before you have done your little healing trick with Bucky."

"It's not really a 'little trick'."

"Exactly," Stark pulled down his glasses over his eyes. "And that is why you are resting. Jane and I will be working in the other end, the arm."

He turned and walked determinably away from Loki back to the work table he supposedly had arrived from earlier. Loki noticed gloomily that he actually cared that Stark hadn't called him 'babe' even once. 

"Thor is hungover too," Jane tried to lighten the mood. "He made a bet that he couldn't get drunk on Earth alcohol. So Clint, Sam, Rhodey, and Darcy joined up and drank against him. It took the four of them, but he lost."

"At least I'm not the only one underestimating you," Loki shifted his seat.

Jane gave him a sad smile and for a moment it seemed like she was going to leave too, but then she wobbled a bit and quickly sat down beside him. 

"Jane?" Romanoff asked. 

"Just a little dizzy," Jane took a breath. "It was a late night, not much sleep."

"Don't believe you," Romanoff sat down on Loki's other side. "I've been watching you, and it takes one to know one. You are pregnant too."

"Don't tell anyone," Jane leaned over Loki's lap, how had he gotten in the middle of this? "Not even Thor. I'm not ready yet."

"Isn't this dangerous?" Romanoff turned to Loki who was feeling his suffering increase by the moment. 

"The biggest danger..." sighed Loki as he felt forced to take part in the conversation. "...is most likely their difference of size and durability. That on top of it being twins. It might shock you that this isn't my area of expertise. We might end up needing to cut them out of her."

Jane gasped and hid her mouth behind her hand. Romanoff gave Loki a look as if she contemplated calling Barton into the room. 

"Here on Earth we call that a cesarian, and it's quite common."

"Yes," Jane nodded and then gave a small embarrassed laugh. "My mother had one with me, it just sounded so... blunt."

"It's the truth," Loki was tired of them now and his head still hurt. "Giving it a fancy name doesn't make it less so, believe me, that is my area of expertise."

He didn't miss the eye-rolling look the two women shared. 

"Are you three girls going to gossip all day?" Stark called out. "Or are we getting some work done?"

"I'm quite finished," Loki got to his feet and managed to stay on them even though his guts made heavy protests.

He walked over to Stark and the worktable. The metal arm wasn't as shiny as he remembered it, it definitely had a lot more wires attached to it. There were also small holographic projections everywhere. Stark was welding something small under an enhancing glass. 

"So..." Stark looked up. "Any dead monsters talking to you in your sleep?"

"What are you talking about?" 

"Nothing." 

Stark turned to Jane who had just walked up and started writing on a keyboard. What she was writing, something resembling mathematical formulas, appeared in blue on a framed plane of see-through glass between them. Loki looked away, the light made him dizzy. 

Stark yawned. Loki remembered Romanoff telling him that Stark hadn't slept. 

"Shouldn't you rest?"

Romanoff gave a huff as if she already suggested this several times without being heard. Stark made a denying grunt and continued welding. 

The forefinger on the metal arm twitched, Loki stared at it as it began tapping out a erratic rhythm on the table. Both Stark and Jane turned from what they were doing to look at another framed piece of glass with a green curve on it. 

"It's a pinched nerve," said Stark excitedly. "This thing is actually cooler than I thought..."

They were interrupted by the glass door at the entrance of the laboratory opening. Rogers was coming through holding on to a paper tray with four large lidded paper cups, and a plastic bag.

"Aren't you a little overqualified for a delivery boy?" asked Romanoff with a smile. 

"Bruce made me," Rogers gave her a sad smile back. "I was getting a bit stir crazy waiting for the surgeon. Why couldn't you have chosen someone closer?"

"Because he's the best there is," said Stark in an all-knowing tone of voice. "Because he had higher security clearance within SHIELD than me without cheating, and he is proven without a doubt not to be comprised by Hydra."

"Fine," Rogers gave him a irritated glare. "I was just asking."

Stark took one of the paper cups, sipped it, grimaced, and gave it to Jane who smelled it and then gave it to Loki. It felt warm in his hand and smelled strongly of spices. It tasted quite good, also it cleared his head a bit. 

Rogers distributed the food. Loki got a strange plastic box with chicken salad. Stark had to help him open the box because it followed no logic that Loki could master up, because obviously he was in a weakened state. It was a bit embarrassing, but at least it seemed to warm Stark up to him again. 

He just wished he could remember more from the night before. 

Jane and Stark continued working while eating. Rogers sat down with Romanoff on the sofa, under strict orders not to touch anything, while Loki, under even more stricter orders, leaned against another workbench. As he ate he was thinking about why Stark was asking him about dead monsters, it seemed such a specific question. 

"Sir," said JARVIS with a strange tone of worry in his calm voice. "The NYPD is on the phone. They are saying there is a robot disturbing the traffic on Park Avenue. Apparently it has your name on it."

Stark turned away from the metal arm and looked around the room. 

"Where is Dummy?"

.....


	11. Walking on sunshine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dummy goes for a walk and Tony gets in more trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A day late but here it is! Enjoy!
> 
> I'm Swedish. I've never been to New York, corrections of time, distances and traffic are lost on me.
> 
> Also, "Language, Cap."

"I'll drive," insisted Steve to Tony's great irritation. "You haven't slept in who knows how long, and you smell like alcohol."

The Audi R8 was currently the only one of Tony's New York cars that was set up with a trailer that could pull Dummy back to the tower. He had driven it himself all the way from Malibu in a fit of madness that he never would do, or talk about, again. The car was boring to him now. Even so, Tony wasn't too happy with letting Steve drive it. It was still an luxury sports car, not a banged up army jeep. 

"Fine," Tony huffed and handed Steve the electronic key. "But only because I don't have time to argue." 

"Okay," Steve frowned at the key. "How do you use this?"

"This really fills me with confidence," Tony sighed and got into the passenger side.

They had left the others up in the lab. Jane would continue working with the arm with Nat's assistance. Loki had been grounded until further notice. The alien had smirked at this, but dutifully obliged. 

The thing that worried Tony the most was how easy Loki had taken it. The old Loki would have had a proper temper tantrum by now over how Tony treated him. This calm reaction was almost worrying, and it couldn't all be blamed on a hangover. It was like Loki actually felt ashamed for what he had done. 

After ten-second lesson in how the car worked they were off. Luckily the morning rush hour was just ebbing out so the streets were fairly easy to get through. Tony was watching the news footage of Dummy on his phone. So far the media was calling the event 'Stark's runaway technology', he hoped that they would stay that friendly. The words 'out of control' were to be avoided at all costs. 

"Why didn't JARVIS notice it leaving?" asked Steve. 

"Loki fried all his circuits," Tony said bitterly. "Dummy's still rebooting, that is 'starting over' in old time-y talk. With his modems and boundary sensors off he is basically invisible to JARVIS except for the motion detectors."

"Why didn't JARVIS tell us he moved then?" Steve made a turn down Park Avenue where the traffic was a bit denser. 

"Yeah," Tony frowned at the dashboard where JARVIS was installed. "Why didn't you?"

"Because he asked me not to tell, sir," said JARVIS. "He just wanted to go for a walk in the sunshine."

That stumped Tony somewhat. In the twenty-eight years that Dummy had been operational the robot had never done something like this. Sure, a personality had formed during those years through the learning algorithm, but that could be said about JARVIS, Butterfingers, and You as well. None of them had ever indicated anything about walking in the sunshine.

"There he is," Steve pointed through the windshield. 

They were in the middle of Park Avenue. Dummy seemed to be leaning over a public flower arrangement. There were three police cars, five news crews, and a small crowd of people surrounding him. Police were directing slow moving traffic past the scene, narrowly avoiding gridlock. 

Tony looked down at his clothes. He had been smart enough to bring a jacket, but underneath he was still wearing his dirty tank top. So much for being in a hurry. 

"Give me your shirt."

"What?" Steve pulled up to the side of the street halfway up the sidewalk.

"There are cameras over there," Tony looked at his reflection on the phone, his bread looked acceptable even though the rest of his chin had a clear shadow. "Where are my sunglasses? Shirt, now!"

"Isn't this too narcissistic?" Steve began unbuttoning his blue shirt, he had a plain white t-shirt underneath. "Even for you?"

"Distractions, Cap," Tony glanced at the reporters who amazingly enough still hadn't noticed him or the car. "If we can give this a humorous spin it won't look like I don't have control over my tech. I can't just look like I ran out of the lab to handle a crisis. Last time I showed myself in public without a proper shirt half of Flushing was on fire."

"Fine," Steve handed him the shirt, it was two sizes to big but it was clean and looked more decent than what he was already wearing. 

"You go first," Tony hurried to redress in the cramped space of the passenger seat. "Distract them."

"How?" 

"Flex your muscles or something. Hurry up, they have noticed us."

Steve gave him a judging look but got out of the car. The reporters were falling over themselves to get to him. The gathered crowd on the sidewalk cheered when Steve waived at them. Tony could hear them through the news broadcast. He wondered if Loki was watching. 

"Has any other tech escaped? Is it dangerous? Is Stark loosing control? Why are you here, can't Stark be trusted by himself? Do you have any comments on what happened in Washington? Is this a publicity stunt?"

"Please," Steve smiled at the cameras like a pro. "The guy is just out for a walk. It's a nice sunny day in New York City, man or robot, who wouldn't take advantage of this lovely weather?"

The reporters looked dumbfounded. Tony laughed, put on his sunglasses, and stepped out of the car. 

"Good morning, good morning, good morning," he said rapidly as he walked confidentiality towards the reporters. "Susan, Trey, Lauren, looking good. Hugh, how's the leg? I'll take it from here, Cap," he patted Steve on the back. 

"Mr Stark," someone shouted as they held a microphone under Tony's nose. "Is this a threat? Is it dangerous?"

At that moment Dummy decided to dig his claw into the ground and pull up a bunch of flowers, roots and all. A policeman looked like he was writing a fine, and it was not the first one judging by the other paper slips in his hand. Tony tried not to sigh. 

"I'll take care of it," said Steve and hurried over to Dummy. 

The reporters seemed divided between following him and staying with Tony. He made it easy for them and followed Steve himself, though at a slower pace. 

"There is no danger at all," he said as he walked. "As my distinguished colleague said, it's a nice day for a walk. The little guy was just a bit stir crazy."

"Is this a publicity stunt to show off your new tech?" 

"New?" Tony laughed as he reached Dummy and patted the robot who was more interested in Steve replanting the flower than his inventor. "If you had done your research you would have known that..."

"...that Mr. Stark built that robot when he was seventeen." 

"Very good," Tony pointed at the young photographer that had finished his sentence for him. 

"But," the young man continued holding up an outdated iPhone as a recording device. "You said that the robot wanted to take a walk, does that mean that it is sentient?"

Tony blinked as the thought suddenly accrued to him, but then quickly laughed it off. 

"Kid, I've been around these things all my life, if any of them got sentient I would know. They are just a heap of programs, learning by imitation. I'm very flattered that you find it life-like, but that all that it is. Life- _like_. Now if you excuse me, I think the city would very much like its street back. Officers?"

The police, who had clearly been growing impatient of waiting, were very happy to take his direction and move the reporters out of the way. 

Tony's mind was still reeling. He had suspected JARVIS of achieving sentience several times, but he had always been able to find a logical answer in the learning algorithm. The thought that Dummy could have beat JARVIS to the punch was just ridiculous. But them again, who knew what Loki had put into the poor defenceless thing?

Tony turned to Steve who had been looking at him and sighed. 

"I'll jack him up to JARVIS with my phone," he opened a docking station in Dummy's haul. "Get the trailer over here and we'll be on our way."

Steve dusted some flower dirt of his hands and jogged over to the Audi, to the delight of some teenage girls on the sidewalk screaming at him. 

"You getting sentient, buddy?" Tony murmured as he connected Dummy to the Stark Network through the phone. "Now there's a thought. What could Loki had done to you to make..."

Tony knew it exactly what it was. But how could it work on technology? Dummy stretched and beeped happily as he was up on the grid again, saying his hello to JARVIS. Tony started an immediate diagnostic. 

Steve did a surprisingly good job lining up the trailer, but then again he had the assistance of three cops guiding him right. Steve got out of the car, he was talking on his phone. 

"...our way. Tell them not to wait for me. We'll be there soon. I'll do that. Okay, bye," Steve gave the phone to Tony. "Bruce called to say that the surgeon has arrived. He has handed his phone to Darcy, she wants to talk to you."

"Does she now?" Tony took the phone, it was a good excuse as any not to help lower the ramp on the trailer so that Dummy could roll up it. "Good morning, sunshine."

"Ugh," moaned Darcy from the speaker. "Don't talk to me about the sun, it hurts my eyes. I'm watching you on TV, are you wearing Steve's clothes?"

"Just the shirt, why?"

"Because the media is going apeshit about it. They think you are having an affair with Captain America. E-news have been streaming with photos of you two touching and standing close. They are saying you are corrupting him."

"When have I been touching him?" Tony frowned and turned to look at Steve who was bending down to secure the trailer from wobbling.

"You are looking at his ass!" screamed Darcy in his ear. "Look away! Look away!"

Tony could distinctly hear several people loudly laughing their own asses off in the background. Glad that someone was enjoying theirselves. 

"Ask Loki if he gave Dummy a Moment of Clarity," Tony sighed. "And have a large pot of coffee waiting for me when I get back, I'm going to need it." 

He hung up. 

"We're ready to go," Steve was holding a wad of fines in his hand, they looked expensive. "Locked and loaded."

"Yeah, one moment." Tony looked around at the reporters, he caught sight of the young photographer right away, and pointed to him. "You! Come here!"

The kid looked confused and pointed to himself. Tony nodded and beckoned him. For a moment it seemed like the kid was going to run away, but then he hurried over. 

"Mr. Stark?"

"I'm going to give you an exclusive, come by the tower in two hours."

"Th-thank you."

"And don't go spreading any silly rumours in the meantime. You can tell your fellow vultures over there that Cap and I are just good friends."

Tony turned without waiting for confirmation and walked to the car, Steve was holding the door open for him.

"Really?" Tony sighed yet again before getting in. 

They could hear Dummy making a very R2-D2-like sound as they started rolling. Tony wondered if Steve would get that reference since he only so far had seen the first Star Wars movie. He leaned back in his seat. 

"Tired?" asked Steve after a few moments.

"I'll manage."

"Are you worried about Loki?"

"Sometimes. He is a walking timebomb, you know that and this just shows it, but I have a sneaking suspicion that he's actually being honest with us."

"Even after this?" 

"He was drunk," Tony knew he was right. "Blowing out all fuses in Dummy would be an evil thing to do, but if he did it as he gave the Clarity... He was just not thinking straight. I've done things when drunk I'm now so proud of. He is the God of Mischief after all, we can't count on him being well behaved all of the time."

They stopped at a red light, pedestrians on the crossing paused and took pictures with their phones as they passed them. 

"What more do you have?" Steve asked as the light turned green. "That we can trust him? If he's going to help heal Bucky, I wouldn't say no to a bit more confidence in him. I mean I know what I got from him was pretty good, but I like to have more on the guy."

"He said..." Tony braced himself. "He said he was going to spend the rest of my life with me."

"The rest of _your_ life?"

"Yeah, I'm going to live like fifty more years, he's going to live like three thousand more. Fuck," se sighed. "I just realised that's the exact proportion between a minute an and hour. Isn't that just dandy?"

They were arriving in front of Stark Tower. Waiting for the garage to open, Steve tapped the steering wheel with his thumbs. 

"You know," he said, driving inside and putting the car in its parking space. "If I only had one minute to live and my partner had an hour, I would feel happy that they'd spend that minute with me."

"Yeah," Tony sighed again, rubbing his face with his hands. "Problem is... he's not my partner for real."

"What?"

"He's a brainwashed mad alien that I've known for like two days who once tried to conquer Earth and killed hundreds of people!" 

He took a breath. Steve waited. 

"I lied to him! I lied to him and told him I liked him to find out what he was up to. And what he is up to is exactly what he says he's up to! He wants forgiveness and protection! And now I'm in a relationship with a injured, in every sense of the word, male who hates being touched and wants to spend the rest of my life with me! I'm never going to have sex again!"

Steve blinked. Tony slapped a hand over his mouth, where had that last part come from?

"I can't believe you!" Steve glared at him. "You are putting us all in danger! What if he finds out?"

"Bruce said..."

"Bruce?" Steve breathed hard. "Bruce knows? Who else?"

"Eh," Tony was beginning to feel claustrophobic in the small confines inside the car. "Clint, Nat, Pepper, Rhodey, and Happy."

"I can't fu- frigging believe this!" Steve hit the steering wheel so hard it broke, exposing wires and circuit boards.

"Please stop," Tony could feel his heart speeding up.

"What did you think I was going to do, Tony? Run and tell? Disapprove? Well, big surprise! I fucking disapprove!"

It had been several weeks since Tony last had a panic attack, that didn't make it better. The last coherent thought he had before his sight narrowed and windpipe constricted was 'yeah, I deserve this'.


	12. Resolution and sacrifice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Decisions are being made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I found the character of Dr. Kingsley (the Surgeon) while browsing on the Marvel Wiki. As I never heard of him before he will most likely be OOC. Sorry to any of his fans out there.

When Stark left the workshop they all had to leave the workshop. Apparently no one was allowed in there without him. Romanoff and Jane carried the soldier's metal arm between them in the elevator, Loki didn't offer to help because he knew they wouldn't have accepted it. 

Still, he got a glare from Banner when the elevator doors opened on the so called 'sick-bay'-floor where the women got out and Banner got in. Loki ignored it and leaned back against the far wall as the doors closed again. 

Loki's headache had succumbed somewhat and he was beginning to feel a craving for salty foods. His wound was still feeling sore though, and his abdomen felt hard. He shifted to a better stance. Banner was still looking at him. 

"I'm aware that I'm handsome, Dr. Banner, but I don't think I'm your type." 

"What is my type?" Banner smirked. 

"Female."

"That does narrows it down," he shrugged and stepped out of the opening doors. 

They were in the common room. Wilson and Darcy were sitting on one of the sofas starring at animations on the TV. Bowls and plates with leftovers from the party were haphazardly placed on the low table before them. Both looked half asleep, but Darcy managed to raise her hand when she caught sight of Loki. 

Banner took a couple of small pasties from one of the plates on the table and sat down next to her. 

"I got a call from the Surgeon," he said. "He'll be here within the hour."

"Where's Steve?" asked Wilson. "Don't tell me he's out running."

Loki looked at Darcy and concluded that she was not going to put the tea kettle on for him.

"He and Stark had to go out in an errand," he took one of the bowls of slaty fried potato slices and placed himself in an armchair, wincing at the pain in his gut as he did. 

"This early?" asked Banner. 

"Why do I sixty-nine messages on here?" asked Darcy frowning at her phone. 

"That's a lot," nodded Wilson. 

"Ms. Lewis, if I may?" JARVIS said from the ceiling. "As Mr Stark's personal assistant you are now in charge of his public relations. It would be a good thing to turn on the sound from now on."

"Oh shit," Darcy sprang up from her seat and started pacing the room as she frantically looked over the phone. "Turn the channel!" 

The TV-screen turned itself from the image of a disproportionate animated dog into a scene of a large road divided in the middle by trees and surrounded by tall buildings. The robot Dummy was casually rolling along it with s small group of humans following. Loki shifted and continued to look casual as he continued to eat. This wasn't his fault, it was the Captain that had left the door open. 

"Okay, take off your shirt."

Loki looked up at Banner standing over him with a stern face. 

"I beg your pardon?"

"Take off your shirt," Banner repeated. "I can see you are in pain. Both Clint and Tony have told me about your wound, now show me."

Loki looked to Darcy who was dividing her attention between her phone and the TV showing off a closeup of Stark's name printed on Dummy in big letters. Then he looked to Wilson who seemed like he had sobered up some and was looking very amused when their eyes met. 

"Please, don't feel embarrassed on my account," he said. "I have some medic training."

"I am never embarrassed," Loki spat back. "I just not comfortable disrobing at command."

"There goes your sexlife," smirked Wilson. 

"That says more about you than it does about me, Sergeant," Loki felt sick at the implicated thought. 

"Tech Sergeant," Wilson corrected with a smirk. "I was in the airforce, not the army."

Loki didn't dignify him with a response. He turned to the TV and watched Stark getting out of a car. He was wearing Rogers' shirt under his jacket. Loki wondered why he felt a sting of jealousy. 

"Come on," Banner hunched down beside him. "From a scale one to ten, how much does it hurt?"

"Why do you care? You don't like me."

"No, I don't like you. But people I do like care about you, so this is for them." Banner sighed and smiled in a way Loki once could have smiled himself when faced with mischief. "And I'm interested in your physiognomy. What can I say? I'm a scientist."

Again Loki was reminded of Stark, he had said the same thing.

"Also, you need to help us with Barnes," Banner continued. "You can't heal him if you are going to hurt yourself doing it."

Loki didn't have time to say anything in response because at that moment Barton stepped out of the elevator. Even though his glasses were dark their eyes met and Loki collapsed, the bowl of potato slices falling to the floor. 

\--- 

"Don't look at his ass! Look away! Look away!" Darcy was yelling at the television.

Loki awoke to the sound of laughter. Again, his head felt like it was going to explode. 

He was on his back on the floor, a cushion was placed under his head. He wondered who had placed him there, who of them that had touched him. At least his shirt was still on, though he noticed that it was pulled up to reveal his stomach. 

"Oh," said Banner. "You are awake. Sorry, I looked."

"At least you are more honest than Stark."

"What do you mean?" Banner suddenly seemed nervous. 

"About sneaking peaks of me while I'm unconscious," Loki glanced down. 

His skin was dark blue and purple. The edges of the wound were frozen together but the ice had a red tint to it. 

"It's hard," Banner placed a hand on the skin, it was warmer than any other hand Loki had felt before, it almost burned. "And cold, like ice."

"Don't touch me," Loki tried not to sound too harsh, he wasn't sure he succeeded. 

"Sorry, I know you don't like that," Banner took his warm hand away and frowned. "I don't know about Frostgiants, but it I would venture a guess I'd say it's infected. Maybe we should have Dr. Kingsley have a look at you as well. Can you make it to the sickbay?"

Loki had a hard time believing that he could, but he was not going to tell Banner that. If he confessed his doubts, they were going to call on Thor to carry him, and Loki didn't feel like suffering the humiliation. 

"Before you do that," Barton came into Loki's view. "Take what ever you did off me. I appreciate it, and it's a pretty cool way to take it out on you, but I need to live with my own mistakes. And you have to live with yours, and yours are quite big on their own."

"I will give you a Moment of Clarity instead," Loki placed his fingers on Barton's temple. 

"No," Barton shook his head. "Don't give me anything, just take away."

Loki nodded and took away the spell he had placed on Barton. Unfortunately it did not give back what was already taken, the hangover and pain were still as clear and present as before. Loki felt sick to his stomach, more than he already was. 

"They are on their way back," said Darcy. "God, is this how it's going to be? Every time he's in the vicinity of someone there's going to be rumours? He pats Steve's shoulder an the press starts planning their wedding."

"There was the shirt as well," said Wilson with a grin. "And how they planted a flower together."

"Not helping," Darcy rubbed her forehead. "Loki? Did you give a Moment of Clarity to the robot?"

"I..." Loki tried to think back on the night before. "Maybe? Did it work?"

"It did, sir," said JARVIS. "The readings from Dummy are quite interesting."

"I would love to see them," said Banner and adjusted his glasses. "But we need to get to the sickbay. Dr Kingsley is probably eager to get to work. Do you want me to call Thor to carry you?"

"No," Loki hissed as he sat up. "I can manage this perfectly fine by my own."

Barton was humming in the kitchen, the sound was almost unbearable. Loki gritted his teeth to get to his feet. There was some white frost sticking to the shirt as he finally stood up. 

"That can't be good," Banner shook his head. 

Darcy was busy with the coffeemaker and Wilson had turned the TV back to animations when Loki and Banner stepped into the elevator. Loki would have liked a cup of tea, but he was too exhausted to ask. 

Arriving to the sickbay they walked straight to the room the wintersoldier was contained. Loki hadn't seen the machine that kept the man frozen before and he wasn't impressed. It looked antiquated, even by Midgard standards. The most impressive thing with it was that it still worked. 

Jane and Romanoff were talking to a tall man. He was wearing normal clothes for human male of of middle age, not unlike Stark's suits, but he was also wearing a white bandage mask around his head and white gloves over his hands. Loki knew there were other so called 'heroes' around besides the Avengers. It would be logical to reach out to them for assistance. 

"Dr. Kingsley?" asked Bruce as the man turned to look their way. "I'm Bruce Banner, this is Loki. We're the ones going to assist you."

"Yes," Kingsley shook Bruce's hand. "Stark told me. Pleased to meet you." He turned to Loki who reluctantly took his hand as well. "And you," he gave a short laugh "I'm a bit of a Mythology-nerd, the Norse Sagas are a favourite of mine."

"Most of them are just that," Loki crossed his arms, placing his fingers in n his armpits. "Sagas."

He perceived the human to be a victim of several burns under the bandages, maybe even the whole body. The visible skin around the brown eyes were mostly scar tissue. 

"Yeah," the doctor turned to look at the machine and the face of Barnes through the frosted glass. "Most of them paint you up to be equal to the devil, I always had a hard time seeing that. So, what do we got here?"

As Bruce explained the situation, and Jane showed the metal arm, Romanoff stepped aside with Loki. 

"Clint messaged me," she said. "About what happened upstairs. He really didn't know you were there." 

"I know, but I still have a headache to prove I was."

"Good," Romanoff sighed. "Ugh! I'm so bored. It's only been a few days, this how it's going to be for nine months? Hill said I could help her with Stark's security, but it sounds so boring. I'm going to go soft if this goes on. What am I going to do? Go to maternity workouts?"

Loki glanced at her, was she... sharing? With him? 

"It's not that I'm not happy," she sighed again. "It's just so much to adjust to..." She shifted and looked up at him. "Don't you dare tell anyone."

"That the great Black Widow is scared?" Loki smirked. "Wouldn't think of it."

"I'm not scared," she hissed. 

Loki knew a lie when he heard it. 

"Loki?" Banner called. "Would you like to show Dr Kingsley your injury?"

No, he wouldn't like that, not at all. But then again, to gain trust you had to show trust. He looked at the human's gloved hands. Somehow they made it worse. 

"Dr Banner told me that you are a magical healer," said Kingsley. 

"To a moderate degree," Loki breathed to calm himself. "It's not my area."

"Still," Kingsley's eyes were keen. "I know someone who benefited from your moderate skills."

Loki met his gaze. It was obvious that the doctor was talking about Coulson. Even more obvious was that he was seeking some of the same treatment for himself. Both Banner and Romanoff looked curious. Jane didn't, she looked guilty, which meant that Thor had told her about Coulson and made her promise not to speak of it. 

"I'm not a trained healer. To compare to Midgardian terms, I would say I'm a field medic."

Romanoff subconsciously put a hand on her stomach. 

"Though a very competent one," Loki added for her reassurance. 

"Dr. Banner," interrupted JARVIS. "Mr Stark was having a panic attack in the garage. Captain Rogers doesn't know what to do. They are on their way up."

"Christ," Banner ran towards the elevator.

"What?" Loki followed. "What's going on with Stark?"

"Post-traumatic stress disorder," Banner rubbed his forehead. "Something must have happen to upset him."

Loki had no idea what that it meant, but the combination of words clued him in. It didn't sound good. It sounded like Stark needed him. 

The elevator door opened. Stark was sitting on the floor with his he'd between his knees, breathing hard. Rogers stood beside him, looking worried. As he caught sight of Loki he tensed up. Banner hurried forward and hunkered down. 

"Tony?" he asked. "Can you hear me? Do you remember the breathing exercise I taught you?"

Stark took a quick deep breath and let it out. 

"Close enough," Banner smiled encouragingly. "Again, slower."

Loki sat down on his knees next to Stark, the human looked at him and seemed to breathe even faster. This 'attack' had something to do with him. Loki wondered if he should fight his repulsion and hug Stark. 

Steve," sighed Banner. "Take him to one of the recovery rooms."

"What happened?" Romanoff asked as Rogers lifted Stark up into his arms. 

"We had an argument," Rogers stepped out of the elevator. "I..." He looked at Loki. "I overreacted."

Jane hurried ahead and held a door open to a smaller room. It contained only a comfortable looking bed and a heavily curtained window. Rogers put Stark down on the sheets. Stark curled in on himself. 

"You argued about me," Loki took a breath hand placed his hand gently on top of Stark's, it didn't feel that bad. 

"Do you want me to give him a shot?" asked Kingsley from behind them. "I have a range of sedatives, some of my own concoction."

"I'm... fine..." breathed Stark, still looking at Loki. "Don't worry... babe. It's... getting better."

Loki forced himself to slide his fingers into Stark's grip. He was acutely aware of the touch, but so far it wasn't overwhelming. 

"He hasn't slept in over twenty-eight hours," said Romanoff. 

"You didn't go to bed after the party?" asked Banner, his voice suddenly slightly rougher but he cleared his throat. "Even after all that you drank?"

"Someone..." Stark sounded irritated and Loki shifted. "Someone was... throwing magic around without... any thought of consequences."

"Give him the shot," Banner shook his head. 

Kingsley took out a syringe, Loki noted that he carried a belt of them under his suit jacket. 

"No, I need to..." 

Stark tried to get up but Loki pushed him down, for the first time touching the circular shape in the middle of Stark's chest. It exuded power, raw, undiluted. He quickly took his hand away, the feeling was too much and wrecked havoc with his headache. 

"You need to sleep," he said. "I will be here when you wake up."

"Oh, great," Stark rolled his eyes. 

They all moved aside while Kingsley injected the sedative in Stark's arm. Loki looked at Rogers who refused to look back, though his expression was more of shame than blame. Something that made Loki wonder even more about the argument that had caused the attack. 

"Bruce?" Stark voice sounded delirious, what ever he had been given was working fast. "When is the puppy coming?"

"It's not a puppy," Banner smiled and patted Stark's shoulder. "He's at least over five years old, and he'll be here in two days."

"We should get a puppy..." Stark snored. 

Romanoff spread a blanket over him. 

"He'll be out for about six hours," said Kingsley. "Now, shall we look at the real reason I am here?"

"Yes," Banner lead the way out of the recovery room. "I've got the operating room all prepared. We just need to unfreeze him from the suspended animation."

Romanoff and Jane followed, Loki held back the Captain. 

"You and Stark were arguing about me. What was it about?"

"Nothing," Rogers tried to leave but Loki still had some strength left in him. 

"Am aware that I'm not the best partner for Stark, but he chose me, and I'm honouring that by receipting that choice. I do care for him, not only because of the spell, if that is what you are worried about." 

"It's not that," Rogers sighed. "I know you do. And I've trusted you ever since I found Bucky on what you gave me."

"Then tell me," Loki swallowed. "And don't lie to me, I know what lies sounds like."

"He- he was worried that he was never going to have..." He closed his eyes and took a breath. "I mean... He was worried about the difference in your lifespans. Something about his minute to your hour, or something."

Loki nodded, Rogers glanced between him and Stark, and then hurried away to overlook the surgery of his friend. Loki turned back to Stark and sat down on the foot of the bed. 

Rogers had spoken the truth. The human's short lifespan was indeed worrying. But the thing that Rogers had stopped himself from saying was also true. Stark was worried that he was never having sex again. From Loki's perspective that wasn't hard, but Stark was a sexual creature. 

He looked at the sleeping man. It had always been the natural course for his potential partners to seek sexual gratification elsewhere. Especially when they found out that he was too powerful, both in his magic and in his kinship to Thor, to even force themselves upon. And then they had left him. He hadn't missed any of them. 

But now there was someone that really cared for him, someone he cared for, and it was proven by magic. He thought of what Rogers had said. A minute to an hour. It wasn't that much of a sacrifice on Loki's part if it would please Stark. Loki could stand it. Had he not endured more pain and suffering than he ever thought possible in the mercy of monsters and intergalactic warlords? Why should a lover's touch unsettle him more?

He carefully laid himself down next to Stark. Above the blanket, there was no need to be precocious. If he was he going to force, no, 'make' him himself do this there would need to be a long gracing period.


	13. Stretching the truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony comes up with a plan but is surprised by a change in Loki's behaviour.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Currently spending the weekend at London Comic Con, but I still manage to give you this :)

When Tony awoke he was starving. He was not tired nor was he hungover, just starving. He was in one of the recovery rooms on the medical floor. He was alone but there was a slight indentation on the bed next to him. Judging from the light through the curtains it was sunset. His belly growled. 

"JARVIS?" 

"Sir?"

"Order the teriyaki-menu from Mrs Heong, tell the to express it."

"Wouldn't you rather join Thor and Agent Barton in the kitchen, sir?"

"Thor and Clint? They're cooking?"

"Yes, sir."

"This I gotta see."

Tony got out of the bed and stretched. He felt surprisingly fit and rested, ready for another thirty hours on his feet. 

The only person there when he stepped out of the recovery room was the doctor in the bandage-mask, Kingsley. He was looking at three different holographic screens depicting security recordings of Barnes' surgery. 

Tony walked up to him. He paused for a moment when he saw the doctor's bare hands. They were badly burned, like the skin had boiled. Tony wondered how the man could still use them, let alone preform surgery. He noticed Kingsley looking back at him, Tony cleared his throat. 

"Admiring your work?" 

"Reviewing it," Kingsley was sorting out surgery tools on the table before him. "According to Dr. Foster we can begin attaching the prosthetic limb tomorrow, baring we got your approval of the design of course."

"I will look it over, of course, but I trust Dr Foster to have followed out my instructions."

"It was a most special session," said Kingsley enlarging one :of the images. "Loki's powers are quite remarkable."

Tony watched the feed as Loki healed an infected area in Barnes' shoulder to prepare for the doctor's scalpel. Loki pressed his hand to his side as he moved aside. Tony could see Jane reach out for him but stopped her movement when Loki shook his head. He turned back to Kingsley. 

"When we spoke on the phone I asked you to look at Loki's injury. Did he show it to you?"

"At the advice of Dr Banner, yes."

"And?"

"It's a severe infection, his body's fighting it by freezing it. I don't know anything about his... his kind, but I don't think it will help in the long run. He's body is like that machine over there, a preserver."

"I'm running several blood analysis on him," Tony pushed his fingers through his hair. "I'm hoping they will show us something."

"Do you want me to take look at them?"

"So you can run to SHEILD with the results?" Tony patted the doctor's back. "You are a medical doctor and surgeon, not a bio-engineer, or even a biologist. I've done my research. Do what I pay you to do and leave the spying to the experts."

"Worth a try," Kingsley shrugged and returned to sorting his instruments. 

Defying his hunger a little while longer Tony looked around the room. The freeze-machine was turned on, Barnes' sleeping face visible in the small window. 

The Winter Soldier's metal arm was on a table hooked up to several machines and screens. The wiring was a bit old-school, but then again, what could you expect from a astrophysicist and a particle physicist, neither of which had more than one doctorate each in mechanics?

It was cute, concluded Tony as he set course for the elevator and stepped inside. 

"JARVIS? Where's Loki?"

"In your shower, sir."

"And how's Dummy's diagnostic going?"

"Dummy is feeling giddy, sir, and I find it very fascinating. I am sharing it with Butterfingers and U at the construction site in Malibu, they are very excited."

"Great," Tony exited the elevator. "Alert me if they get any ideas to take over the world."

"Yes, sir."

"Who's taking over the world?" asked Hill from the sofa, she and Natasha were looking over some of the Tower's security protocols on a laptop. 

"Butterfingers and U," Tony walked passed them. "They will start on the West Coast, leaving a trail of dropped screwdrivers and well organised pencil holders behind them. Is there any food? I'm starving?"

There was a surprisingly delicious smell coming from the kitchen. Clint was overlooking two large pots of spaghetti. Thor was stirring with what looked like a small tub of tomato sauce. He was also wearing an apron, Jane was taking photos of him with her phone. 

"Boss?" Darcy was holding on to three different phones, and had a StarkPad and a folder under her arm, she seemed stressed. "There was a reporter here earlier, he was really cute. He said you promised him an exclusive interview. I rescheduled him for after breakfast ten o'clock tomorrow morning."

"Breakfast gets earlier every day," Tony looked around. "Seriously, there must be some bread or something to tie me over."

Jane pushed a packet of breadsticks over the kitchen island towards Tony, someone must have told her about his aversion to being handed things. Tony smiled gratefully at her and took the package. As he broke into it Steve, Sam, and Bruce entered through the glass door from the roof.

Steve sighed when he caught sight of Tony. Sam gave him a small encouraging push, Bruce nodded. Whatever the three of them had spoken about outside must been about what had happened earlier. Steve stepped forward. 

"Tony, can I talk to you?"

"Are you going to break something else?"

"I'm sorry about the car," Steve sighed again. "I just want to talk to you."

Tony walked over to the bar, he needed a drink. It shouldn't be healthy feeling this rested after sleep, a guy could get addicted to sedatives. Give him alcohol and exhaustion any day. Steve followed him and sat down on a barstool. 

"Look," he said slowly. "I realise why you did what you did, and why you kept it from me. I don't want to fight..."

"Neither do I," Tony stirred his drink with a breadstick. "Least of all without my suit. I admit that I was wrong when I lied to Loki, and I've put us all in danger. But don't worry! I got a brilliant plan that will set everything straight."

"And how are you going to do that?"

Tony glanced over to Thor who was holding out a wooden spoon with sauce for Jane to taste. He leaned closer to Steve. 

"I'm going to fall in love with him."

Steve blinked. 

"Don't you see?" Tony took a bite of his soggy whiskey-flavoured breadstick, it didn't taste half bad. "If I fall in love with him it doesn't matter that I have to spend the rest of my life with him. It doesn't matter if I lied to start with, because we would be in love!"

"I don't think you know how love works," Steve shook his head. "You just can't make yourself fall in love."

"Just watch me," Tony emptied his glass. "I already appreciate his sense of humour, I respect his boundaries, and I think he's really hot. See, so far it's going great."

"But you lied to him. This will only be another lie."

"Didn't you hear the guy?" Tony poured another glass and dipped another breadstick into it. "The Clarity can't make you fall in love, it only brings out attraction. Loki never thought I was in love with him, only that I was willing to give it a try. Me falling in love would be the only natural course after that. I'm just following the rules here."

"Tony..." Steve buried his head in his hands. "Don't you see that you are dragging the rest of us with you. We are all lying too by keeping your lie."

"Life's a dick," Tony shrugged. 

"So's you, apparently," said Darcy's voice from behind him. 

Tony sighed and turned slowly. He hadn't known her long enough to catch any subtle face expressions, but the non-subtle ones spoke volumes. She was not happy with him. He gave her the smile that had stopped working on Pepper quite quickly. Darcy didn't seem to buy it either. 

"Darcy..."

"It this what that exclusive interview is going to be about? Are you coming out publicly? Are you making an official gesture so that Loki would believe you even more?"

"I..."

"You have to tell me these things, boss." She took Tony's glass and emptied it with a wince. "I'm your personal assistant, I'm supposed to help you with these things. Even the things that make you a dick, because you are by the way, a huge one. Do you have breadcrumbs in your drink? Is that something I'm supposed to know?"

"You..."

"Loki is, and I can't believe I'm actually fucking saying this," she too glanced over to Thor who wasn't looking. "He is my friend. I won't tell him about this, because I see your heart is in the right place, and it's your thing to tell, even if you are a dick, because you are, but if you do anything, anything, to hurt him, and if you survive, I'll taser you, and I'll film it, and then sell it to prime time television. Got it?"

Tony nodded. He had no idea how she had managed to put that sentence together, but he nodded. Steve chuckled. 

Bruce was gesturing for Tony to come over. He was glad to take the opportunity to get away, but not before taking a new glass of whiskey with him. 

He knew his plan was good. His heart _was_ in the right place, he had put it there himself. Steve was wrong, Tony knew how love worked. He had seen his father make himself fall in love with his mother for years. Tony was of course much better than his father and would do it in much shorter time. 

Then he noticed something odd about Bruce. The combed hair, the non-stretchy trousers, and freshly shaven face.

"Are you wearing a tie?" 

He also noticed that Jane was narrowing her eyes, not at him, but at Bruce. This was unprecedented. How could Bruce be in trouble? Bruce shifted nervously, patting the tie to his chest. 

"What's going on?" Tony asked. 

"I'm taking Darcy out..." Bruce took a breath "...for a date."

"What?" 

"Loki offered me a new Moment of Clarity. I didn't ask for it, he offered it. I accepted. I... I realised that I really wanted to take Darcy for a... a date." 

Bruce looked a bit green but not in a Hulk way, more of green in an opposite of a Hulk-way. 

"I'm ready," Darcy called over from the bar. "I just need to fit all this crap into my bag."

"I'll wait," Bruce shifted again and pulled Tony close and talked to him in a low voice. "Loki is beginning to suspect," he whispered. "He discovered that the robot got emotional, and then I think saw him counting. I think he offered me a do-over just to test the sequence out. So I lied, I said I got an emotional as well. Then when I was asked to prove it I panicked and asked Darcy out."

"So that's why Jane's mad at you," Tony scratched his head. "It's going to be all right. You are a cute couple. Hulk likes her."

"She's eighteen years younger than me," Bruce hissed. "I had graduated college before she left kindergarten."

"You're talking to me about age differences?"

"Sorry." He took a deep breath. "As we stand now only Thor and Loki are unaware of your lie. Jane, Steve, Sam and you know that I lied to cover you. This is beginning to fall apart."

"Don't worry, I have a plan."

"I hope so, because mine isn't working out that well."

"Hey, Bruce?" Tony leaned in even closer. "What did you really get?"

"Something we two need to talk in private about," Bruce held out his hand to Darcy who came up to meet him.

She smiled. 

"Don't wait up, boss. I'll be back in time to escort you to your interview on time."

"Half past twelve, on the dot." Tony made a salute. 

As they left Tony noticed Loki coming down the stairs. His hair was neatly combed back, and he was wearing Tony's favourite Ramones t-shirt. He was smiling in a non-creepy way, Tony took it as a good sign. 

"Hi, babe," Tony smiled back. 

"Hi, Anthony," Loki kissed him, on the lips.

That voice did things to Tony. 

Something was seriously different. Loki had called him Anthony. Tony wasn't sure if it was good or bad. 

He did notice, though, as he looked into those green eyes, that Loki's mind was traveling a mile a minute. That was never good. Loki's long cons where brilliant, as the time he let himself be captured and taken to the Helicarrier. Loki's improvisations ended in chaos, and Tony getting thrown out of windows. 

But then again, it was a bit exciting to see Loki would do next. Wasn't that a sign of love? Tony was definitely crushing this. 

"I figured out the order of the Clarities," said Loki with a sweet smile. 

"You- you did?" Tony started counting on life my it would take to summon a suit, not long enough. 

"Yes," Loki nodded he counted on his fingers. "It started with Jane, intellectual. Then three emotional. Darcy, you, Banner, then one intellectual for the captain, then Potts emotional. Then it starts over, intellectual for Barnes, and emotional for the robot and Banner. If it's true then next will be emotional and then intellectual."

"So One, three, one, one?" 

"Yes."

Tony felt his throat dry up, he and Bruce had unawares lied in the same place in the sequence. 

The next two would be as Loki predicted, the next five even. It wasn't until the sixth Loki would discover the lie. Was he really give out _six_ more? That seemed a bit far fetched, didn't it? He should tell Loki the truth...

Loki was holding Tony's right hand. Tony hadn't noticed since he was lost in thought. It wasn't really a hold, more a touching of palms. He frowned in confusion. Loki was staring very resolutely back at him. Why was this sweet?

"Loki?" Thor suddenly took hold Loki's arm and pulled him away, forcing the light hold to break. 

"Don't touch me," hissed Loki as he was directed to the other side of the kitchen.

The two of them started whispering in aggravated tones. Tony glanced down at his empty hand. 

"Ready to eat?" asked Clint placing the first pot of spaghetti on the table. "Hurry up and take your share before Steve and Thor gets here."

Tony didn't need to be asked twice, he was still ravenous. He hurried over to the table that was set with several nice white plates. 

"Stay out of my business," Loki raised his voice and pointed at Thor's chest. 

"I'm only looking out for you, Brother."

"Look out for someone who needs looking after, _Brother_. You..." Loki took a deep breath and avoided Thor reaching out for him. "Don't touch me."

"Anything wrong?" Tony asked taking a much longed for first bite of his food, for being something cooked by Clint and Thor it tasted remarkably good, or maybe it was because he was so hungry.

"No, he talks about things of which he has no knowledge," Loki glared at Thor. "I'm going to bed. Anthony, do you want to join me?"

Tony blinked. That sounded almost like an invitation. He looked Loki over, the tired face, the awkward stance, the hand over his side. He remembered what Kingsley had said about the frozen infection. 

He felt bit irritated that biology never been his strongest suit, that was more Bruce's area, the best Tony could do was to build a machine that could look it for him online. The first blood analysisis, a sample that Tony had taken from Loki's shirt the first night the alien arrived, and from the pad Clint had given Loki after the Clarity with Barnes, would be done soon. So would the scans he had taken while Loki was out cold. 

"Im done sleeping," Tony swallowed down what he had in his mouth. "Sorry, babe. I got to look over the arm, and then Dummy needs an update. I'm probably going to be in the workshop for a while. Sam totally said I could rebuild his wings."

"Did not," huffed Sam but Tony ignored him. 

"You go rest, babe. I'll come by later, okay?"

Clint made a snort-laughing sound. Loki gave the archer a glare. 

"I'll wait for you to finish eating and then go with you to keep you company," he gave Tony's cheek a light kiss, without touching any other part of him. "Excuse me for a moment."

Tony watched him walk over to the other side of the room towards the toilet there. He seemed to be in a hurry to get away in spite of the graceful way he moved. Tony assumed that even gods sometimes needed to go badly. He continued eating.

"Shut down," Clint gleefully shook his head as soon as Loki had closed the door. "I didn't know you had it in you, Stark."

"What?" 

Steve sat down next to him, placing a small mountain of pasta and sauce. 

"Come on, even I could see he was flirting with you."

"You did the right thing turning him down, my friend," said Thor. "I don't believe my brother to be of right mind." 

"When is he ever?" asked Nat sitting down across the table. 

In what way had he turned Loki down? Had he missed something? It was strange that Loki all of a sudden had kissed him after they already established that touching was to be at a minimum. Tony was about to ask what the hell was going on when JARVIS interrupted. 

"Sir, the second perimeter on your New Jersey warehouse has been breached."

"Come on," Tony sighed. "I'm eating here. Don't I have security guards to take care of these things?"

"A team of guards were dispatched, sir. None of them have called in."

"I'll take it," Hill got to her feet. 

A grid of nine security images from the warehouse in question came up on the TV-screen. There seemed to be nothing out of the ordinary. Just rows and rows of shipping containers and wooden boxes. Tony had never been there personally, but you seen one warehouse you seen them all. 

"What do you have stored there?" asked Steve. "Is there anything there worth stealing?"

"It's possible that some of the equipment that me and Bruce 'rescued' from Hydra and/or SHEILD is there."

"Then I'll go with you," said Steve to Hill. 

"Me too," Sam stood up. 

"Call us if you need backup," said Tony stuffing his face with more food. "We'll monitor the security feed."

The three of them nodded and hurried towards the elevator that immediately opened as they approached, JARVIS must have been ready for them. They were gone within moments.

Thor eyed the half-eaten food they had left behind on their plates. Clint grinned and pushed them towards him. Thor grinned back and scooped the food over to his own plate. Jane just rolled her eyes and continued eating.

"I'll just stay here then," said Natasha in a grumpy tone, poking at the very expensive handcrafted wooden table with a fork. 

Tony felt bad for her. It couldn't be easy being left behind when you been creeping behind the front lines for you entire life. 

"You can make yourself useful by checking over the inventory Bruce made," he said. 

She gave him a irritated look but brought the laptop over to the table nonetheless.

"I still can't believe you kept that secret from us," Clint sat down next to Tony with a large plate of food of his own. "We could have helped."

Loki came out of the toilet. His face was wet and his hair was even more slicked back as if he had been dunking his head in the sink. It was a bit worrying. If the guy was falling apart they would all be in trouble.

"You were busy," Tony watched Loki as moved over to the windows, he seemed to be looking at the last rays of the sunset, but who knew what he was thinking. 

"Yeah," Clint shook his head. "It was a fucked up couple of days."

Tony knew that Clint had been recuperating from the events of New York at a secret SHEILD boot camp at the time of the Hydra-attack in Washington. More than half the agents there had been compromised and Clint had had to lead the still loyal ones in a messy fight for survival. Tony hadn't asked for details, but he had seen some footage. 

Jane wobbled on her feet as she rose and caught herself on the side of the table. Tony noticed Loki turn to look her way with genuine concern on his face. 

"Jane?" Thor reached out for her. "Are you feeling unwell?"

"Just a bit tired," she smiled, glancing quickly at Loki and then away. "It's been a long day."

Well, that was a lie, thought Tony. He knew for a fact that she too could stay up for days if there was science to be done. He wasn't sure if he liked the way Jane had looked at Loki, like they were sharing something. There were definitely more secrets going around than his. 

There was a movement on the warehouse security feed still playing on the TV. It was too soon to be Hill, Steve, or Sam to be arriving. 

"Rewind," Tony quickly swallowed what he had in his mouth and pointed at the screen. "Stop and enlarge. What was that?"

The screen became burry for a second but was then filled up by the bird's eye view of the face of a man looking right back at them. There was a resigned smile on his lips, like he was both amused and disappointed that he had let himself be caught on camera. It was the face of a dead man. Phil Coulson. 

\---


	14. Old friends, new solutions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil Coulson has returned. Loki feels closer to Tony.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the comments. I appreciate them. 
> 
> I love slash and I'm not averted to reading smut, but I am asexual and dislike being touched, and I wanted to see what Loki would do with my feelings. I'm a bit more tolerant than him though, but only because he's thougher than me.

"Holy shit!" 

Loki wasn't sure if Stark, Romanoff, or Barton had shouted first but it was definitely the right sentiment for all three of them. He smirked. Jane said nothing, which only proved that Thor had already told her. 

Identity markers were already mapping out the face on the screen, measuring distances between ear and eye, nose and lip, jaw to brow. It was a fascinating dance. Loki thought it unnecessary, all of them knew who it was. 

"Ninety-seven percent accuracy to last known record of Agent Phillip Caulson," said JARVIS. "Amending for slight hair-loss, marginal weight-loss, and change of posture."

"Yeah, and being alive," Barton breathed. 

"That too, Mr Barton," agreed JARVIS. 

"You..." Romanoff turned to Loki, her eyes flashing with anger. "You didn't kill him?"

"Apparently not. I'm glad he's felling better though."

"You knew he was alive?" She raised her voice in a very uncharacteristic way. "You bastard! You knew!"

"Don't blame him," Thor stepped forward to stop her from jumping Loki, not that he couldn't defend himself. "Son of Coul asked us not to tell."

Thor looked both irritated, apologetic, and indigenous. It was a impressive set of contradictory emotions for such a bulk figure. He had obviously been fighting some inner moral of honour against his loyalty to his friends. 

"Should we, like, call somebody?" asked Stark as he rose to his feet. 

"Sir, I have sent the security image to Ms Hill," JARVIS announced. "May I make the suggestion that you might be better off to lie down on the sofa, sir?"

"Stark- Anthony?" 

Loki hurried over but Thor, who was still protecting him from Romanoff, was in the way. Not that she would pose a real threat to either of them. She would probably get a few good hits in though, since neither of them could use their regular force against her, thought Loki. That would most likely upset her more, and she was already pretty upset. 

Barton shook off his shock long enough to take Stark by the arm and lead him towards the sofa.

"I'm fine," Stark sat down. "Stop fussing. I'm all right."

It hadn't been a new panic attack, Loki could see that, more like a passing feeling, or a small aftershock. Loki finally managed to get passed the threatening redhead, she was more focused on Thor now anyway, and came to sit down beside him. He only hesitated slightly before taking his hand and squeezed it. 

"Why are you doing this?" Stark looked from the hand to Loki's face. 

"Because I want to," whispered Loki back. 

For a god of lies Loki could have done better, and he knew it himself. He was unpracticed and Stark could surly feel how strangely Loki held on to his hand, how uncertain he was about how hard or light the pressure should be. 

"I'm fine," Tony squeezed Loki's fingers back and then, surprisingly, let go. "You don't need to worry. I won't have another attack."

Was Stark actually respecting him? 

Barton's phone interrupted by ringing, he answered it almost immediately. 

"Yeah, Cap," he said. "It seems to be true."

"Talk," said Romanoff to Thor. 

Barton held out his phone, letting Rogers, Hill, and Wilson listen in. 

Thor sighed. He looked at Loki who decided to ignore him and watch Stark instead. Stark was looking at Romanoff. 

"He asked us not to tell," Thor crossed his arms defensively. "It was a matter of 'international security', he said."

"The cat's out of the bag now," said Loki imitating a Midgardian expression. 

"Loki..." Thor sighed. 

"Don't look at me," Loki shrugged. "I was against keeping it as a secret to begin with, I only kept quiet because he asked me and I still felt I owed him after healing him.

"You healed him?" Romanoff turned. "You brought him back to life?"

"That would totally break the Aladdin-rules," Stark joked. "But he has been quite lenient on the wishing for more wishes-part..."

"Tony! Shut up!" both Barton and Romanoff screamed at the same time. 

"Just tell us," said Rogers' voice from Barton's phone. 

"Actually," said another voice, this one from the television. "It might be better if I told you myself."

\------ 

They had left Banner and Darcy to their date, Stark had said that it would be a shame to disturb them. Also, if there was anything too upsetting in their meeting with Coulson they would be prepared to cushion the blow for Banner. 

Loki had agreed. He wanted Banner to be pleased with his gift, that's why he had offered him a new one. He had seen the suffering and he felt a need to help, a rare and strange reaction on his part, but still. If Banner got together with Darcy it might even heal the total mess that Loki had done with his first gift. 

Banner had seemed nervous as he revived the new gift. It almost seemed like he was covering up for something. Loki knew the signs better than anyone. But then Banner had asked Darcy out and Loki had understood the nervousness. 

They were waiting for Hill, Rogers, and Wilson to return to the tower with Coulson. Stark had given his permission for SHEILD to take what ever they wanted from the warehouse just as long as they gave a good explanation and let him in on the result. 

Loki glanced to Stark beside him, or 'Anthony' as he had decided to call him to get a better familiarity. The human was deeply emerged in a digital blueprint of the soldier's arm depicted on a of his portable computers. 

The attempt to seduce Stark hadn't gone that well. Perhaps it was because there was still some of Loki's aversion in the way, or all of the aversion to be honest. 

Also inexperience of something he was not entirely willing to learn. He had been forced to take a breather the in the small bathroom to be able to continue. He wanted to get closer to Stark, Anthony, but how much of himself would he need to sacrifice on the way? 

Thor had seen the signs and had tried to dissuade him from going further. He had said that Loki probably would build himself up for a even greater harm. It was like Thor knew something he didn't, it irked Loki that such things were possible. Loki had done what he did best when it came to Thor, he had lashed out and walked away. 

He and Thor had still been forced to tell their side of the story, though. How the Lady Sif had aided Coulson and his team to apprehend an Asgardian fugitive, and how Loki then had healed as much as he could of Coulson's scars - most of which had been left by Midgardian physicians, not him. 

Neither of them knew how Coulson was alive, and Loki did not share his suspicions. 

"Why wouldn't he contact us?" asked Barton in a frustrated tone, and then turned to Romanoff. "Am I still compromised?" 

"I am," she said calmly. "I'm sure that they had a good reason. Like they needed to even more undercover to fly under Hydra's radar. You and me are pretty public figures now."

"Still," he sighed. "It's not like we can't keep a secret. It's not like we're Tony."

"Hey!" Stark huffed. "Just because I declare myself a superhero in front of an international press junket doesn't mean I'm not good at keeping secrets. You told Loki everything about us when you were brainwashed, and Nat dumped the entire SHEILD database online. I was a miracle that I was able to contain the arc-reactor technology from leaking. It also cost me near twenty million dollars to retrieve all the Helicarrier wreckage from the damn Pontiac before the government got their Hydra-stained hands in them."

The two ex-spies exchanged a defeated look. Barton then glared at Loki. 

"It's not my fault you were so knowledgeable," Loki teased. "If it makes you feel better you were an excellent second in command,"

"Actually," smirked Barton. "It doesn't."

"No pleasing some people," Loki sighed. 

Stark laughed. Nobody else did, but all of them had some sort of smile on their lips, even Romanoff, so Loki saw it as a gain. He was slowly winning them over. 

The elevator doors opened and everyone got on their feet as Coulson entered the room. The man looked around the room, his eyes pausing only momentarily on Loki before turning to Barton and Romanoff. 

"Agents," he nodded. 

"Sir," said Romanoff stone-faced. "Or is it 'Director' now?"

"Either works fine," Coulson replied I the same fashion. 

The next moment all three of them were hugging and laughing. 

Rogers, Wilson, and Hill also exited the elevator. Rogers was carrying a steel crate that he put down on the floor. It was painted with Stark's name branded on the lid and had a numeral code lock. Loki could feel a strange muffled power emerging from it. 

Coulson was being hugged by Stark who pretended to not be as touched by the moment as he really was and blinked away a tear. When it was Thor's turn he lifted Coulson off the floor with his hug, which was overkill according to Loki since Thor had known all along that the human had been alive. Jane's embrace must have been a balm after that. 

"I hear congratulations are in order," said Coulson turning to Romanoff. 

"We're moderately hopeful," she took Barton's hand and smiled bravely.

"That much?" Coulson stroked her arm before turning back to Stark. "And you are getting yourself into trouble as usual."

"If you are talking about my new boyfriend, he is no trouble at all," Stark grinned broadly. "Well, not as much as trouble he could be anyway."

"Thank you, Anthony," Loki felt a bit irritated that he actually preened slightly at this. "I do try."

The incredulous looks there exchanged in the room were almost tangible. Loki ignored them all and focused on Stark's small laugh instead. Stark was more agreeable now. Loki hoped that he had forgiven him for the robot. 

"If we could get down to business," Rogers stepped forward. "Sir, you said you were going to tell us how you survived when we were all gathered."

"Yes," Coulson sighed and looked around. "Where is Dr Banner?"

"On a date with Darcy," said Jane.

"We thought it was best to leave him out of it for now," said Stark. "He's having some... emotional things to work through." 

"Very well. What do you want to know?"

"What did you take from the warehouse?" asked Stark indicating the crate at Rogers' feet. 

"That can wait," Rogers said with a inpatient tone. "How did you survive?"

"Actually," Coulson took on a grim face. "They're kind of the same question, at least the answers are connected." He took a breath. "I didn't survive. Loki did kill me. I was dead."

Again Loki ignored the looks coming his way. He had explained himself enough, they all knew he hadn't been of sound mind at the time. Also, Coulson had forgiven him. The human looked between the Avengers. 

"When Fury rallied you over my death, he didn't lie. Though for the record, he did purposely destroy my vintage Captain America collection for effect."

"This was most deceitful of him," agreed Thor. 

"We're talking about Fury here," Stark got to his feet and walked over to the bar. "I'm not surprised at all. He even faked his own bloody death. Anyone else want a drink?"

Barton began to raise his hand but it got hit down by Romanoff. Stark shrugged and took out a glass for himself. Loki joined him at the bar. Stark gave him a breadstick. 

"I was..." Coulson paused and breathed. "On second thought, I will have a drink."

"Sure," Stark placed another glass on the bar. "I guess the resurrection wasn't that pleasant."

"No, I try to avoid remembering it," Coulson hastened over, the others followed him with wary expressions on their faces. "It's quite easy most of the time, until it isn't."

Loki felt his own wound twinge, he didn't know if it was in sympathy, shame, or something else. What he did know was that he most likely was the only one in the room, except for possibly Stark, that could understand what Coulson was feeling. 

"SHEILD was not only experimenting with alien technology," Coulson swallowed down half his drink. "They also experimented with actual aliens. And I don't mean samples from Thor or Loki, but real actual aliens from outside the nine realms. From their blood, they managed to derive a serum. A serum that..." He drank the rest of the drink "...that brought me back. Though some surgical assistance was necessary as well."

There it was, the explanation why Loki had felt something different and foreign in Coulson's body while healing him. The usages for such a serum could be endless. Perhaps even a chance to prolong life. He looked to Stark, who was frowning into his glass at the ice sloshing about there. 

"Why didn't you tell us about this?" asked Thor. 

"I've learned a lot of things since I became Director, not all is for sharing."

"In other words," said Romanoff. "It was on 'need-to-know'-basis. You were going to tell us when you were ready to tell us."

She seemed irritated, most likely because she just discovered that she no longer was in the inner circle. That too Loki could sympathise with. 

"You getting caught on camera just now wasn't a mistake."

"No, it wasn't." Coulson put the he glass back on the bar. "Well, to start with, but then I decided to roll with it. The laboratory with the alien was permanently destroyed. But we managed to track down some of the equipment that it was based on."

"In the warehouse?" asked Barton. 

"My team is working some of it over as we speak. They are good, but will be even better with some of your input."

"This serum..." Stark was still frowning thoughtfully. "Do you have any of it?"

"Only in my blood." He glanced to Rogers. "I had a phial of the real stuff but I had to destroy it rather than let Hydra get their hands on it. We have been unable to synthesise it, but with this new equipment..." he indicated the crate "...we can try again." 

"It could be what we need to find a cure for Loki's injuries."

"Anthony?" Loki gasped. 

"I'm just looking out for you, babe," Stark winked. 

Loki suddenly had trouble keeping a stupid smile off his face. Stark really liked him. This was beyond what ever the Clarity was able to give. He glanced at Thor who gave him a big smile back. For a short moment Loki was unable not to respond to it. He hastily looked away. 

"Thank you, Anthony," he almost whispered, this time the words sounded more true. 

After that everyone seemed to relax. Coulson was invited to stay the night, he accepted. They moved towards the kitchen were food was being brought out and reheated. Coffee and tea was brewed, cakes and biscuits appeared from somewhere, and a few more drinks were poured from a bottle _Anthony_ brought with him from the bar. 

From Coulson's description of the alien both Loki and Thor agreed that it had been one of the Kree people. It wasn't encouraging since the Kree was a very warlike race. They were not 'evil' in the Midgardian sense of the word, but still most likely to be on the opposite side from them of any confrontation that could come to pass. 

Hopefully Coulson's blood would be sufficient, and they wouldn't need to go on a off-world hunt. Not that that couldn't be a nice change of pace, though Loki doubted anyone else would think so. He only knew one Kree personally, and Loki didn't think that they would get any kind of assistance from that corner. 

Rogers and Wilson were telling Coulson about Barnes and what had happened when they found him in Washington. Jane and Romanoff were whispering closely together. Barton was trying to make Thor to do the dishes, Thor played ignorant and let Barton demonstrate. 

Hill was typing on ferociously her computer, the others had been upset with her over already knowing that Coulson was alive, and that she had been working with him on the side. Anthony had said something about her being a traitor, but he had laughed as he said it so it was probably not heart-felt. 

Anthony was slightly drunk but still drawing brilliant mechanical designs of armour on his small computer. 

Loki felt a cold shiver run through his body. He had had several cups of hot tea made for him but he still couldn't shake the icy feeling in his stomach. He was beginning to feel a bit nauseous. 

"Tony," said Rogers. "Isn't it time for you go to bed?"

"I slept enough," Anthony stretched his arms over his head, making his shoulder-joints crack. "I'm sure you know the feeling, Cap. Anyway I need to go look over your boyfriend's arm for the surgery tomorrow." 

"I'd rather postpone the surgery than having you look over the arm in the state you are in now," Rogers have him a stern glare. 

"Don't you trust me?" mocked Anthony with a crooked smile. 

Rogers was about to answer when he blinked and stared down at Loki's hands on the table. Loki looked down as well. His hands were blue.

Ridges looking like dark blue scar tissue crept over the back of his hands resembling long, thin earthworms. He watched in horrific fascination as his nails grow longer, curled inwards, and turned black. 

"Norns," whispered Thor in a tone that Loki felt in his soul. 

"That's just freaky," said Anthony with big eyes. "Not freaky like in freak, mind you, just freaky." He raised his computer and took a picture. "That is so cool. Can we go, like, take some samples?"

"You're drunk, Anthony," Loki spoke calmly as if he was talking about the weather.

He must be in shock since he could feel his heart beating hard in his chest, spreading what felt like thicker blood through his body. He glared at Anthony as the human took another picture. 

"Whoa!" exclaimed Barton and Loki knew his face was blue and his eyes were red. 

"Thor," he growled. "Don't you dare summon Mjölner."

"I wasn't going to," said Thor too quickly and hiding his hands behind his back. 

"We really should take some tests..." said Jane in awe. 

"Gorgeous, babe," said Anthony excitedly. "Are you blue all over? Can I see?"

Loki was amazed. Everyone in the room, except for Thor who looked tense and sad, seemed to be fascinated with the change. There was curiosity, but no fear. Midgardians had not been brought up to fear his kind of monster, though he doubted that any of the Avengers would actually be scared of him if they had. Not even Jane who looked at him like she won the first prize in a science fair, yeah, she had told him about those. 

Next thing he knew there was a stabbing pain in his gut. It was so sudden he had to bend over and subsequently he hit his head on the table. The wood cracked under his horns. As he straightened up he saw the front of the green shirt soaking in sticky dark blood. 

He raised the shirt to look at the damage. The protective layer of ice was gone, the wound was open. The purple and red bruises and veins were really standing out against his blue skin. 

"Sick-bay," said Anthony in a hurried businesslike, and very sober, tone. Now! Thor! Move!"

Loki didn't even protest as Thor lifted him up, that was quite worrying.


	15. Small graces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki is stabilised, and a possible solution might be within grasp.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the cliffhanger last chapter. I didn't even think of it as one before I read the comments. lol. I must be too inside this story to see it from another perspective.

Tony was coming down from his adrenaline and was unfortunately drifting into a hangover. 

When Loki first drifted into his Frostgiant form it had been very cool, pun intended. Tony had gotten an awesome photo of Loki's face halfway blue and his eyes looking like they were filling up with blood. Tony looked back at it now and deleted it, he deleted all of them. The pure fear and sadness in Loki's expression had said it all. 

Tony had done what had seemed to be the most logic thing to do at the moment. He had ruthlessly evacuated Barnes from the freeze-machine into Steve's arms, and then placed Loki inside instead. 

Loki didn't fall asleep, and his voice could not be heard through the seal of the machine, but he was able to make sufficient lip- and head-movements to say he was stabilising and was going to rest. The look he gave Tony was both amazed and grateful. Tony touched the glass, and then he quickly made a thumbs up so not to seem too soppy. 

He didn't fool anyone. Hill rolled her eyes at him. 

He turned to see Steve carry Barnes into one of the recovery rooms. It looked strange not only because Barnes was missing his entire left arm, but also because the two men were roughly the same size. 

Tony looked over the Loki's vitals on a screen. It was hard to tell what was normal to Loki. The only thing he had to compare with was the tests he had done when Loki was intoxicated by proxy. The sober blood sample wasn't much to base any kind of prognosis on. Mostly it was guesswork. 

Natasha, Hill, and Barton were looking over his shoulder, though it was anybody's guess what they could understand of the readings. Jane was explaining the metal arm to Coulson, and to a lesser extent Thor who only pretended to be interested and kept glancing towards the machine and Loki. 

Sam was standing a bit awkwardly to the side seemingly not really fitting in with the gang without Steve around. Tony reminded himself to do a little bonding later with the guy over the Falcon wings. It was something to look forward to. As it were Sam had to fend for himself, it wasn't like he was some kind of withering wallflower. 

Dr Kingsley stepped out of the elevator. His head was expertly covered in gauze even though he was wearing striped blue pyjama pants and a black t-shirt under his white lab coat. He was putting on rubber gloves over his burned hands as he walked. He looked curiously towards the freeze-machine but then followed Sam into the recovery room where Barnes was. 

"What do we think?" asked Clint who was sitting by crosslegged on top of one of the examination bunks. 

"I think I need Bruce here," said Tony with a sigh. "I'm calling Happy to pick them up."

"Let the guy sleep," said Nat. "I'll go get them. I'm taking the Lotus."

"That's a two-seater," Tony called after her as she left.

"Then they just have to cuddle up," she grinned as the elevator doors closed around her. 

Tony huffed and turned back to the screens. He wondered what a normal heart rate for Loki was, as it was now it matched Tony's own, and he was a bit excited. 

"To bad to break off their date," Clint smiled. "I wonder how it went. They make a cute couple, even if it came from Loki."

Jane snorted incredulously, but then shook her head when the others looked at her. 

"I'm impressed that you got this thing up and running," said Coulson indicating the freeze-machine. "Hydra technology isn't always compatible to regular energy sources."

"I'm running it at a frequency replicating as close to their Tesseract-copy as I can. It's nothing like my copy of course." He patted his arc reactor. "But I got some Hydra weapons, and power cells as well, on our outings. I made some improvements. For science."

"Naturally," Coulson smirked. 

Tony sighed as he realised he couldn't really do anything more without Bruce, it was quite frustrating. In frustration he organised some of the graphics to a more pleasing order. It wasn't that pleasing. 

"You do care for him then?" Coulson said. "Loki?"

"I..." Tony didn't really know what to say, did Coulson know?

"Don't worry about what I think about it. I admit that he killed me, and that it hurt like a sonovabitch, but it comes with the job and I'm all for second chances. In my opinion he's nothing more than a tool, in all senses of the word. As I said, I don't like him but I have forgiven him."

Tony patted his shoulder in sympathy. Coulson didn't know. And since Tony didn't feel that he could stand another lecture he said nothing. 

Thor was standing in front of the freeze-machine, looking in through the small glass window.

"It is hard to see him like this," he said sadly. "His is he face that haunted our dreams as children."

"That is just fucked up," Tony walked up beside him. "He's adorable like this. I don't understand why you described the Frostgiants as monsters."

"It's mainly their conduct and their cold hearts that makes them monstrous," Thor said with a tone of admittance. "But I agree that he doesn't hold too much likeness with the normal Frostgiant. My father explained it that Loki is a runt, a deformity among the Frostgiants. Also, he had not grown up in the harsh environments and traditions of Jotenheim and his skin is therefore untouched."

So he was a monster among his own people as well. Tony rubbed his aching forehead. 

"I lied," he breathed. "I lied about the Clarity discovering my feelings for Loki. Well, not really, since lying about it has made me find out that I like him, but not originally, like. I've only known the guy for a few days, and before that he... but I mean... I'm going to make up for it. But... Yeah, I lied."

Tony did not receive a blow to the face by Mjölner so he guessed that he could risk looking up at Thor. 

"I'm not the one you should confess this to, my friend," Thor shook his head. 

"You knew?" 

"Jane told me," he shrugged. "I am very disappointed in you, but I understand your reasoning."

Tony looked at Jane who also shrugged. Coulson gave them all a disapproving looks, Tony guessed that the guy couldn't throw so much blame, having lied himself about being dead. 

Jane walked over to sit next to Clint, he gave her a hand to climb up on the bunk. Hill was already sitting on his other side. 

The three of them seemed to settle in as an audience for what was to come. It was a bit unnerving, and gave Tony a feeling that he had to preform for them. 

"You will receive your punishment for lying by Loki himself," said Thor in a grave voice. "As will we others for helping to hide your lie. But still, the truth is yours to tell. You might be able to ease the blow. But do it soon or I will tell him myself and then you will not be as lucky."

Tony nodded. 

Thankfully Kingsley made a distraction by coming out of the recovery room, he was changing gloves as he walked. His belt of syringes was missing two of their capsules. Tony assumed that Barnes had been given double the dosage of what ever cocktail he himself had gotten earlier. He wondered if it was enough. 

"How's Barnes?" asked Coulson. 

"Stabile," Kingsley snapped his glove. "He's still good for the surgery tomorrow, but Captain Rogers informed me that it might be postponed."

"We'll get back to you on that."

"Am I allowed to look at the vitals now?" the surgeon asked as he indicated the freeze-machine, a smirk in his voice behind the bandages. 

"Go on then," Tony gestured towards the screens. "Since the Director is here and all." 

Coulson was ignoring him. He was busy texting, using both his thumbs, probably trading super-classified information with some of his super-spies at a super-secret location. Tony scoffed at the technology, just because he could. 

"What's Dr Banner's ETA?" he asked. 

"About seven minutes out," Clint glanced at his watch through which he was in contact with Nat. "Nat's briefing him on the way."

There was going to be some upset feelings. Tony feared for his Lotus, he just had it equipped with a new sound system. 

"I was right about the infection being frozen," said Kingsley, looking their way. "I'm not sure what happened, maybe..." he shrugged "...his body just couldn't take the strain anymore."

Tony shuddered. 

"He seems to respond to the treatment though," the surgeon continued. 

"What treatment?" Tony hurried over. 

The numbers seemed to return to normal, or at least what he could derive was normal for a magical ice-alien. He looked at Loki's face through the glass, the blue was gone. Tony knocked the glass, Loki's eyes opened, slightly annoyed and sleepy, but they were white with bright green irises. Tony laughed and waived at him. Then he composed himself, cleared his throat, and made a thumbs up. 

Loki rolled his eyes and then closed them again, going back to his rest.

"This is awesome," said Tony as he looked over the results. "But does this mean I have to build an ice-coffin for him in the bedroom? That's very Dracula, and I'm not sure if my interior designer can pull that off."

"You'll need to research the intervals," Kingsley took up a small pad from his lab coat and made some notes, Tony would probably need to confiscate that later. "But it's most likely just a temporary solution."

Tony nodded. They might have clues to a permanent one, thanks to Coulson, but that might take a while to facilitate. Perhaps they even could combine it with Extremis someho, but that was in the future. For now they only had what they had. If this was the best that they could do for the moment then so it was. 

Steve and Sam came out from Bucky's recovery room. Steve seemed quite bummed out but had one of his bravest faces on, which was very brave indeed. 

"We're going back up," he said to the room in general. "There's not much we can do here. Anyway, it's beginning to get late." 

"Is it passed your bedtime?" asked Tony. 

"No, but it's passed yours," Steve said whit half a smile and turned to Coulson. "Sir? Where do you want your crate? Shall I put it in Tony's lab?"

Coulson seemed slightly shocked at being addressed as 'sir' by Captain America, but gathered his senses quite quickly. 

"Yes, thank you, Captain," he said with a even voice. 

"Wait," Tony held up a hand. "The crate! Loki started feeling bad after it arrived, I saw it. JARVIS? Is there any kind of radiation coming out from the warehouse crate in the common room?"

"None that register with my sensors, Sir," answered JARVIS. "But Dummy says it's a pretty blue glow."

"Dummy?" Tony frowned. "Is Dummy in the common room? What's he doing there?"

"The dishes, Sir."

"Do I have any plates left?" 

"All of them, Sir." 

"Wonders never cease," Tony clapped his hands once. "All right. Cap, please take the crate to my lab. Rest of you, at ease. Please, go about your business as usual. Jane? Want to come at look at strange radiation with me?"

"Actually..." Jane looked conflicted and a bit sad, scratching her belly. "I think I should led go to bed."

"Okay, do what you want."

He was a bit disappointed to loose his lab partner, but then again he did a lot of great stuff in his own. Bruce would probably come by, later. 

Coulson and Hill were definitely joining him because the followed without asking. 

"Tony," Thor called after him. "I will trust you to reveal yourself to Loki tomorrow. This game has gone on long enough."

"Oh, trust me. This is not a game."

"Good," Thor looked even more bitter. "Because I believe he aims to seduce you."

"Finally some good news," Tony sighed before the doors closed around him. 

That wasn't good news. He leaned back against the back of the elevator. Loki didn't want to be touched, if he went against that with Tony it would essentially be Tony forcing himself on Loki. Not good at all. 

They stepped out into the common room. Dummy purred and beeped by the kitchen area, it actually sounded like he was singing. At the moment he seemed to be organising all the spoons from every drawer in the kitchen according size on the table. Tony really needed to take a look at that diagnostics. 

It was on his to-do-list. Right after telling his emotionally unstable boyfriend that their relationship was built on a lie. 

The crate was there were they had left it. The Stark logo was still intact and clearly visable, which only proved that it didn't contain the Arc Of The Covenant. Tony thought of making that joke, but Steve hadn't seen Indiana Jones yet, and the other three would only give him dirty looks. 

"It makes sense," said Coulson. "There are alien technology in that crate, some of it could have affected Loki in his weak state."

"Do you know what it is?" Sam asked. 

"Bruce and I just went in and took what ever we could get our greedy little hands on," Tony rubbed his face. "We haven't really gotten around to look at everything yet. There's just two of us."

"I can lend you a small team from SHEILD," said Coulson. "They are all cleared from Hydra."

"And who cleared the people clearing them from Hydra?" asked Steve lifting the heavy crate like it weighed three quarters less than it did. 

"I did," said Hill. 

"So I'm getting people with second-gen clearance?" Tony shook his head in mocking disbelief, trying for the moment to push away any unpleasant thought coming to him. "They can have the ninth floor. It's free ever since I gave up on copying that stupid Star Trek food replicator. The only thing it could do was to make a high nutritional sticky porridge that tasted like fermented cheese. I still have some if you would like to try it."

"Can't wait," said Steve hoisting up the crate in his arms.


	16. Magic never lies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki wakes up and some truths are revealed.

Loki was awoken by the machine he resided in opening. The so called Medical Bay was empty. Judging from the timekeepers on the nearby screens it was early morning. He wondered if Anthony was awake. 

"Good morning Loki," said JARVIS from somewhere above him. "I hope you have had a pleasant sleep. Your infection has been restored to it previous level."

"It has?" 

Loki lifted the stiff blood-dried shirt from his stomach with his, thankfully not-blue, fingers. The wound was covered in a solid patch of pure clear ice. His skin, though still bruised and irritated, was not rock-hard anymore, but slightly yielding. It was probably as good as he could wish for under the circumstances. 

But best of all, his headache was gone. He hadn't been without it since he fell off the Bifrost and woken up by Thanos' heavily booted feet. 

As he continued studying the glowing screens around him he put together that the machine was actually copying a similar climate as the one on Jotenheim. It was even possible that if he stayed in there long enough his injuries would heal. 

How long was long enough? How much of Anthony's short life would he miss out on? 'A minute to an hour', he thought to himself. There must be something he could do to prolong it. 

There was Idun's golden elixir back on Asgard, of course, but all Midgardians that had tasted it so far had been corrupted by their own inner demons and had all been needed to be fought down. Anthony's demons were already consuming him. It was not an option. 

Loki looked up from a far too intimate body-scan of himself, depicting all his inner organs, and outer. Who's idea had that been, he wondered sardonically, and more important who had seen it? 

With no pain in his head it would be easier to concentrate on spell work. Loki tried some simple magic to clean the bloodstain off his shirt, the dried blood fell like sand to the floor. He pushed it around with his toes. His feet were bare. The shirt was clean. The headache came back. 

Curse it. 

He rubbed his forehead with the heel of his right hand as if he could erase the returning pain that way. Why was magic turning against him? It had just been a small cleaning spell. 

Loki's good mood was gone. He wondered were Anthony was. Where was anyone? He walked over to the row of door leading to the recovery rooms, but only one seemed to be occupied. He peaked through the door to see Barnes laying on a bed starring back at him. 

"Good morning," said Loki. 

Barnes huffed, his eyes narrowing as neither of the two words agreed with him. Loki was sympathetic. The man was on his right side with his right arm down into the mattress, it made it look like he had lost that one as well. The short sleeve of the grey shirt he was wearing lay limp over his missing left shoulder. It could have looked humours, but it didn't. 

Loki closed the door. 

"Where is Anthony?" he asked the computer. 

"Mr Stark is sleeping in his workshop." 

JARVIS turned on a surveillance screen showing Anthony on the rickety sofa on which Loki spent his night on after the party. The human was hugging one of the back-pillows to his chest. Loki smiled. 

"Hello?" called a voice from over by the elevator.

It was Banner. Loki took a few steps back from the screen into the room to make himself more visible. 

"Good morning," he said. 

"Morning." 

Banner wasn't as grave as Barnes. He admitted it was morning, the verdict was out if it was a good one. He looked tired, not the kind of tired he would look after a visit from the Hulk, but the kind that indicated that he hadn't slept all night. 

"JARVIS let you out? How are you feeling?"

"Not as bad as I could," admitted Loki. 

"We have been looking over some of the alien equipment that was found in the warehouse," Banner took up some kind of a scanner from his jacket pocket and fiddled with the gages. "We might be able to hook something up to the freeze-machine to help you heal faster. It's it's a theory so far, but Tony is confident that it could work."

Loki looked over to the screen were Anthony still was sleeping soundly. Banner followed his gaze and smiled. Loki had seen that kind of smile before, a mix of pride and sadness. It reminded him of his mother. Adopted mother. 

"It was a bio-battery of some sort," continued Banner as he ran some scans over the, idiotically named, freeze-machine. "In the crate. We think the radiation affected you in your weakened state and brought on your... episode. We should run some tests, when you feel all right with it, of course."

Loki wasn't sure he would ever feel all right with it, but in the end, it could help Anthony and maybe even himself. He walked over to take a closer look at what Banner was doing. 

"May I suggest an analysis of Loki's magic?" JARVIS politely asked. "Perhaps the Moment of Clarity itself? Mr Stark would be very pleased to have some real numbers to run."

That did sound like something Anthony would like, thought Loki. They could study the magic together, make experiments side by side, and learn from each other. It would bring them closer together and it would most certainly distract Anthony while Loki worked on himself. 

"What do you have in mind?" Banner looked up. "How would we even measure it without you short circuiting the entire building?"

"Based on my analysis of Dummy, I have completely isolated two units and reinforced them. I and the building will be perfectly safe. Thank you for your concern, Dr Banner."

They were interrupted by the door to Barnes' room opening and the man himself stepping out. His hair was almost the length of Loki's, his face covered in dark stubble. He looked very awkward with his single arm. He brown eyes scanned the room, stopping on the freeze-machine. 

"You shouldn't be up," said Banner with a frown. "By the way, shouldn't you be restrained?"

"I'm not Hydra," Barnes walked over to them, he also had bare feet. "I could never be with them again. I remember what they did to me. I remember everything they made me do. Every person they made me kill..."

His fist was clenched, his teeth were showing, and his eyes were hard. Anyone who wasn't a god or a monster would have shown fear at this point. Neither Loki not Banner reacted at the threat. Barnes looked confused.

"You should still relax," Banner pointed to a low examination table. "You are having major surgery in a few hours. Come, let's have a look."

Barnes hesitated.

"Where is Steve?"

"Captain Rogers is currently doing his morning exercise, swimming in Mr Stark's jet stream pool, Sergeant Barnes," said JARVIS. "Shall I call him? He did wish to be informed when you awoke."

"No, let him be. I don't need him to hold my hand."

The soldier walked over to the examination table and sat down. He stared dully forward, his eyes focusing inwards. Loki knew that look, The man was preparing himself for pain. Banner put on some gloves. 

Loki watched him carefully remove the grey shirt to reveal the bandaged up torso. Barnes didn't even flinch. 

"I'm sorry that your evening with Darcy was ruined," said Loki with a glance to the doctor. 

"There wasn't much to ruin," Banner was slowly unwrapping the bandages. "It was nice, she's a very funny girl. But I'm too old for her, and I have my little intimacy problem."

Loki frowned. He knew that Banner wasn't making comparisons, but still. 

"Then you are dissatisfied with this gift as well."

"No, no, no. I love the gift! It's... It's..."

Banner seemed a bit paler, but that could easily be a result from seeing the metal joint perturbing out from the partly open wound on Barnes's shoulder. Loki felt a bit uncomfortable himself at the sight. The parts he had healed yesterday were bruised but otherwise fine. 

"The gifts are futile," Loki breathed out his disappointment over another failure. "Your first gift gave you the feeling of loneliness because you are the only one of your kind, but you are surrounded by people who care very much about you, so they canceled each other out. The second gave you a chance of love but you can't use it because you think you are destined to be alone."

"It's not it," Banner rubbed his face with his lower arm. "Darcy is a wonderful girl. She deserves more than me. I'm broken. I can't give her..." 

He quieted. The realisation of the similarities in their situations must have come to him. Barnes looked between them. Loki wondered how much he knew. 

A grid of blue light appeared on Barnes' shoulder as JARVIS scanned it. A holographic replica of the metal arm appeared on the joint. 

"Try moving it," said Banner, clearly trying to change the subject. 

At first the holographic arm didn't move, but then the fingers twitched, then the hand. Barnes did a good job of hiding that he was impressed. He made a few stretching movements, the light seemed to follow his commands perfectly. Then the hand trembled in s half closed position. 

"I can't make a fist."

"Concentrate on it," Banner wrote some numbers on a screen. "Let the computer make some calculations."

Barnes' face cringed hard, but the fist only lightly. He screamed in frustration. The arm shot out unexpectedly and passed through Loki's hip. 

Loki knew it was just light and it was all in his mind, but he still felt something. He jumped back, hitting his thigh on a small metal table that tipped over and spread some rolls of bandages over the floor. 

"Sorry," Barnes did sound sincere

The hologram disappeared, leaving the metal joint exposed again. 

"It's fine," said Banner with a encouraging smile. "Tony can fix it." He turned to Loki. "How are you okay?"

"I don't like being touched," Loki regained his composure. "I never have. Every time I feel like my skin is crawling away from me."

"Like an exposed nerve," Banner sighed. "I know the feeling."

Barnes nodded in solemn agreement. Loki took a breath, the two humans were strange confidants, but somehow he felt safe with them. 

"I have learned to tolerate some touches and even to appreciate them, like that of my... my mother, and sometimes Thor because I know the idiot sometimes can't help himself. I'm doing my best to get used to Anthony now..." He took another breath. 

"Why are you making yourself do that?" Banner asked. "It was Tony who came on to you. You have no responsibility to oblige him, even if you are after forgiveness..."

"I'm not after forgiveness, I've told you this," Loki tried to hold back a bit of irritation. "Magic made Anthony realise his attraction to me. First I was caught by surprise, because why would someone like him ever be attracted to someone like me?"

"Have you looked in a mirror?" Barnes huffed. 

"It's more than my body. Magic doesn't lie."

"People lie," said Barnes. 

Loki was only too well aware of that. 

"I like him. He is intelligent, handsome, and full of wit. I'm willing to try..."

It wasn't as easy as he had thought, and Loki hadn't thought it easy at all. His entire logic was falling on its head and he needed something to grab hold of. He had never felt sexual attraction to anyone, and he doubted that he ever would, but this must be the second best thing to it. Mustn't it?

"Look..." Banner bit his lower lip. "There's something..."

He was interrupted by the elevator opening and Jane coming out. She looked a bit stumped to find the three of them looking back at her. 

"Oh, hi," she said awkwardly, her hand going to her face. 

Then she caught sight of Barnes's open shoulder and paled. Next thing she had kneeled down on her knees and vomited in a waste basket. 

"Jane?" Banner hurried over. 

She insisted that she was fine, but he still followed her into the bathroom. Loki was left alone with Barnes who seemed a little upset over what just happened. The man frowned and glanced down at his basically non-existent shoulder. 

"It's not you," Loki said, feeling that he had to say something without breaking Jane's trust about the pregnancy. "She's just a bit sensitive around blood."

"I'm not so fond of it either," Barnes said quietly. 

Loki nodded. He looked back at the screen where Anthony had been displayed earlier, it was blackened out now. _People lie,_ he thought. He wondered what Banner had been about to say, and why Anthony had seemed so nervous the night before. 

"You really trust this magical stuff, don't you?" Barnes interrupted Loki's thoughts. "I can see why, what you gave me really cleared my head. Though I'm not sure if I'm supposed to be grateful or not, knowing what I know now."

"Be neither," Loki sighed. "It is I that should be grateful that the Avengers accept my broken currency as payment."

"Maybe it would be easier if we better understood how magic woks," said Banner returning alone from the bathroom. "Then perhaps it would be easier to see were it could be set to use."

The look he gave Loki told that Jane had divulged to him about the pregnancy. It worried him. Loki wondered if it was the obvious size difference between the parents or the whole alien babies-aspect that was most troublesome to the doctor. 

Loki would most certainly need to use magic to help Jane through the next months. Romanoff was also dependent on him. Understanding his magic better would only be a benefit. He had never had the tools to do it before. 

"JARVIS? Where are those isolated units you spoke of?

"Two floors up, Loki," answered the computer.

His head hurt, but he felt well rested. It wouldn't be so bad. And if it became bad, now there was a solution, at least a temporary one. Loki gave Barnes a nod and walked to the elevator. 

Kingsley stepped out as Loki walked in. The doctor's morning seemed to be both morning and good. He was probably excited about the surgery, though it was hard to tell because of the bandages. Loki wondered when the doctor would ask him for help in healing those scars. 

Romanoff had also been on her way out of the elevator but stayed inside with Loki as the doors closed. She regarded him with quiet suspicion. They exchanged no greeting, morning or otherwise. 

It was uneventful a two second ride. 

The large room they exited to was very white. And so where the rows and rows of machines there. There were large fans in the ceiling, rotating their long blades rhythmically, keeping the room cool. Romanoff made a noise between a laugh and a huff.

"What utopian sci-fi movies did Tony snowed into before designing this?" 

"Dr Strangelove, The Matrix, and a few classic Dr. Who episodes," said JARVIS. "And Spaceballs, of course."

"Of course," Romanoff rolled her eyes. 

Loki ignored what they were talking about. He was going to ask Anthony later, but for now he was more interested two Iron Man-armours standing, still and golden, in the middle of the room. They reminded Loki of the two sentinels always placed outside the gates of the Asgard throne halls. 

The armours were battle-worn and obviously decommissioned. The only reason to save them were either for spare parts or sentimentality. Or for experiments with magic. 

The robot Dummy was also there. It was ineffectively polishing one of the armours with a cloth. It seemed very exited to see Loki and hurried forward to place its claw-head on his shoulder. Loki patted the metal. It was similar to greeting a pet, something Loki never had any trouble with. 

"What are you going to do?" asked Romanoff. 

"I'm providing Anthony with research material," Loki looked over the first armour, it had a numeral of thirty-seven on its right arm. "And proving something to myself."

He took hold of the armour's cool head, stared into its luminous eyes, and spoke the spell. 

The armour fell backwards like a dead weight, clanging loudly to the floor. A strange smell of burning chemicals came off it. Romanoff covered her nose. 

Loki felt a sting in his head and gut, but he recovered fast. The rest in the freeze-machine had really done him good. The month he had spent with Jane and Darcy in the hot desert had perhaps not been the best choice for his constitution. 

"Did it work?" he leaned over the armour. "Was it emotional?"

He had never realised how much Anthony and Iron Man was one before. He knew the armour was just an empty shell, but it still tugged on him. 

"It had the same signature as the one I registered with Dummy," said JARVIS. "I will know more once I've analysed it more closely."

"Is this a good idea?" Romanoff sounded hesitant. "Is Tony really okay with this, JARVIS?"

"Mr Stark has given me authority to gather information on anything I find that can be described as 'important', 'secrets', and 'cool stuff'. This qualifies as all three. Loki? My scans tell me that you are well enough to do it again."

Loki was. He needed to know that he was right. One, three, one, one. This one and then the cycle would start over. He took the other armour between his hands and spoke the spell. 

This armour too toppled uselessly over, lightly emitting smoke. Again he felt pain in his head and gut, he had to place a hand on Romanoff's shoulder not to loose his balance. The recovery he had gotten was almost gone. It was all in the name of science though, an expression he had heard Jane use many times.

'This was indeed different," said JARVIS in a thoughtful tone that didn't fit into his characteristic. 

"JARVIS?" Romanoff frowned. 

"The sequence is still adding up," Loki combed his hair back with his fingers. "One, three, one, one. Magic is never random."

"You are really a 'try first, ask questions later'-kind of guy, aren't you?" Romanoff poked one of the armours with her toe. "No wonder Tony likes you."

The elevator doors then opened and Darcy's smiling face poked out. 

"There you are, Loki! Hurry up! Mr Stark wants you to sit in with him on his interview."

"'Mr Stark'?" asked Romanoff. 

"I'm practicing," answered Darcy as she ushered Loki to follow her. 

\-----


	17. Cliffhanger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony is being interviewed and several secrets come to light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A cameo by Peter Parker.
> 
> Today is a holiday in Sweden so I rushed through my read-through, but I still wanted to put it up. Forgive minor mistakes.

JARVIS was not responding to Tony's usual casual conversation, but all Tower automatics worked perfectly fine so he wasn't too worried. Maybe the computer was giving him the silent treatment for not abiding to the sleeping- and eating-restrictions set up by Pepper that Tony had continually ignored through the night. 

He would still be in his workshop, idling away over frustratingly unresponsive alien technology, if Darcy hadn't come in and threatened him with making Thor carry him into the shower.

Tony was now clean, Armani-suited, and waiting for Loki to be collected. 

Darcy had been very mean and placed the interview in one of the smaller lounges on the fifteenth floor that didn't have a bar. Tony was left with coffee as only stimulant. 

Her and Bruce's date seemed to have gone well, even though it had been overshadowed by Coulson's return. 

After last night's revelations Bruce had reacted with both shock and slight anger, but had been able to control the Hulk since he also had been very happy to see Phil alive. They had spent the rest of the evening in Tony's lab. 

Phil had given up around midnight, the weakling. Then again the agent had been no more than an observer, and wasn't so much involved in the actual work. The guy was currently a few floors up sharing breakfast with Clint. 

A team of SHEILD tec-heads were going to arrive within the hour, not that Tony needed any help. 

After Phil had left Bruce had told Tony about his real gift from Loki. It was an idea for a new kind of protection against cosmic radiation. Another step closer to Tony's dream of making a space-worthy Iron Man. The protection would work on a larger ship as well, but it was good to start small, at least when it came to space exploration. 

Otherwise Tony was all for 'go big or go home'. A sentiment not always shared by Bruce. 

The reporter arrived before Loki, waking Tony out of his daydream. The young man was shown in by Happy who was another person that Tony had neglected lately. He made a mental note that suggest a workout soon, or even offer the man a holiday, send him after Pepper and find out where she was hiding. 

Not that he was missing Pepper, that much. Anyway, Tony was confident that his social leash now had a bit more of a stretch to it, at least until Darcy caught up. But then again, now that he was trying to be a committed monogamous relationship there were little less opportunities to stretch. 

"Good morning," Tony shook the reporter's hand, he was much younger than he remembered. "Peter, was it?"

"Yes, Mr. Stark. Thank you so much for choosing me for doing this. I mean..." 

"Not at all, kid."

He watched as Peter set up a camcorder on a tripod. He glanced at the brand on the casing and scoffed at one of his competitors' logo. Then again, Stark Industries didn't make camcorders, or cameras for that matter. They made phones and computers with those things in them, thank you very much. Tony should probably get on that, after solving the world energy problem of course. 

And his other things on the list. 

He sipped his coffee. 

Then Loki arrived. He was followed inside by Darcy who closed the door behind them in a symbolic gesture of no escape. She sat down on the opposite side of the table, out of the camcorder's range, she set a bag full of papers and electronics on the chair next to her. 

Loki walked into the room as he was owning it, which was impressive since Tony would have been fooled if he didn't know for a fact they the room was actually his. Something must have happened to boost Loki's confidence. He was still wearing Tony's green Ramones-shirt from yesterday, though thankfully the blood was gone. Tony had been worried about that. 

He felt happy when Loki seemed so confident, it was a strange feeling. 

For a moment Loki looked uncertain again, noting the reporter, but then he smiled in greeting. He did not offer his hand but was friendly enough not to seem rude. He had been brought up a prince after all. 

"This," said Tony proudly, holding out his arm towards Loki. "This is my boyfriend. Headline: 'Sorry ladies and gents, Tony Stark is off the market'."

The kid looked stunned. He was staring at Loki as if seeing a ghost. 

"Anthony?" Loki lowered his voice and leaned towards Tony as he sat down next to him. "This is a herald, yes?"

"Absolutely. We are telling the world, babe."

Darcy gave Tony a threatening look, he gave her a reassuring smile which she didn't believe. 

For the next five minutes Tony told Peter about meeting Loki through Thor, discovering common interests, and, admittedly spreading it on the bullshit a bit thick here, getting closer in a whirlwind romance that had surprised the both of them. 

The story certainly seemed surprise Loki because he couldn't stop staring at him through the whole thing. At the end when Tony, slightly moved by his own story, reached out to momentarily place his hand on Loki's, Loki didn't even stop him. 

Tony smiled his billionaire smile, ready for a photograph. The reporter kid was still strickenly staring at Loki who, to his credit, was ignoring it like a pro. For a sensational interview this one had a intense lack of questions. Tony had just come out as dating a male alien after all. Then again, the kid couldn't be more than twenty years old, it was possible it was his first time. Still...

"Peter?" Darcy tried to hide the irritation in her voice. "I'm not the one telling you to do your job, but you should really ask them things."

"Yeah..." Peter blinked, glanced at her, and then between Tony and Loki. "I'm just... Mr. Stark... Are you sure about this?"

"About what?"

"I mean," the kid shifted and leaned closer to Tony in a theatre whisper. "Isn't he the guy who invaded New York with the aliens last year?"

Tony blinked. He looked at Darcy, who only gave him half a panicked look and a shrug, no help there. Loki shifted uncomfortably. 

"Is he?" Tony decided to joke it away with a laugh. "Are you sure about that?"

Peter bent down and took up a Starkpad from his bag (at least there was some room for taste in there) and quickly opened up the photo gallery. Tony knew what was coming but he stayed calm. 

He tried to sip some coffee but the cup was empty. He glanced at one of JARVIS' sensors, a emergency would be great right about now. JARVIS wasn't responding, something must have happened. Was it enough to warrant a check without it seeming made-up?

An album was selected and put on slideshow. They were actually pretty good photographs, most from high and impossible angles. Did the kid have a personal jet pack or something? Had he hijacked one of the Chitauri crafts?

Loki's face was clearly visible in several of the images. He was wearing his full green and gold armour, complete with staff in hand and that ridiculous helmet. There were even ones with close ups at the portal-machine on the roof of the tower, and some of the portal itself. Tony began to feel queasy. 

"That's a good picture of Eric," said Darcy. "Though I doubt he would appreciate it. A little too much mad scientist."

Then there was picture of a window breaking, followed by a series of images of a body falling and then being caught by an Iron Man suit wrapping around it. Loki was standing in the frame of the broken window, quite majestically. It was surreal to see it from this angle. Again, how had these pictures even been taken?

Tony felt his heart beat speed up. None of these had ever been published. If they had, Loki's face would be out there in the media instead of the fuzzy news images that already were. The kid was holding a large fortune in his hands. 

"That's enough," said Loki taking the Starkpad away from Peter and breaking it in two halves as easily as if it had been a piece of dry plywood. "You are upsetting Anthony."

"Hey!"

"Oh!" said Darcy. 

"Yes, that was me, but now I'm with Anthony. I do not intend to do anything like that again, unless _someone_ forces my hand."

"I had stuff on that!"

Tony was feeling a bit more confident. Knowing that Loki would become a warlord only if he was to be painted as one was a strangely comforting thought. That was something Tony could handle just fine. He took one of the pieces of the pad and peered down at the broken circuits. He had thought he had designed it more sturdy. Maybe he should hire Loki as a product-tester. 

"I'm sure you had backups on most of it," said Tony.

"Oh, he did, sir," said JARVIS from above. "Unfortunately there has been a small EMP-accident just around the vicinity of Mr. Parker's home computer. I regret to inform you that every electronic device in the area around it has been destroyed."

Then the camcorder gave a electric spark and started slightly smoking. 

"Oops," said JARVIS. 

Okay, thought Tony. That was a bit unusual, but it could wait. He looked back at the kid who was looking very confused at the moment. 

"I could recover it for you, but you would have to give me a reason."

"I had no plans of using the photos," Peter stated forlornly at the camcorder. "I was just so surprised to see him."

Tony gave him a look. Darcy made a unbelieving noise. Peter sighed. 

"Fine, I was saving them for a rainy day. But still! You are with him?"

"Love works in mysterious ways," shrugged Tony. 

Loki made a choking noise. Then he disappeared as if in a blink of an eye. One moment he was there and the next moment not. The tree humans gasped and stared at the empty seat.

Tony bit his lower lip, was it something he said? Had it been to soon to bring up love? Tony wasn't finished with all his steps yet. He had found an article online earlier and it had warned about premature confessing. He had found the phrasing funny at the time, but wasn't that sure anymore. 

Also, was Loki even well enough to do teleport safely? 

"Sorry," he said getting up. "I have to find him. Darcy, solve this."

Without looking back Tony left the room and hurried down the corridor, loosening his tie. 

"JARVIS, locate Loki."

"In the med-bay, sir," the computer answered. "He's talking to Dr. Foster in one of the cranberries."

"In one of the what?" Tony frowned as he stepped inside elevator. 

"The place with the bed, sir. Potato. Excuse me, I'm experiencing some difficulties."

Tony frowned even more as he took up his phone and quickly logged on to the digital mainframe. It was overflowing with information and numbers. It reminded Tony of those hectic moments after the SHEILD information-dump when they had been forced to scramble through massive haystacks of codes in seconds to find the precious needles that belonged to him before anyone else grabbed them. 

This wasn't that though. These codes looked almost organic, but his phone was not the right tool for the job. 

"Basement," said Tony and the elevator dropped. 

He really needed to talk to Loki, but if JARVIS was malfunctioning the Tower could be loosing integrity. Anyway Loki was with Jane, Tony wasn't sure he should interrupt. Loki definitely wasn't a girl, but it had the vibe of 'girl-talk', and Tony knew from experience not to barge in on those. Especially when they were about him. 

The basement was the floor just over the Hulk-cage. It was the central nervous system for the Tower. Some might argue that this wasn't the best place for such a important system, but then again, if the Hulk got out it was the best place for him to get electrocuted. 

Bruce and Thor were already there when Tony arrived. 

"Ah," said Bruce. "I was just about to call you. There seems to me something wrong."

"There is much electricity in the air," agreed Thor. "I was drawn here by it."

Tony walked over to his holo-screen platform. Within moments he was surrounded by a cylinder of information flowing around him in rapid speed. Thor was right, the energy outpour was almost double than normal. The Tower's arc-reactors could take it, but some circuits were rapidly overheating. 

"Turn off grids five to nine," Tony adjusted some levels on the screens. "Patch ten through the base."

"Careful with the med-bay," said Bruce pointing to a hologram. "They're preparing surgery."

"I have my eye on it."

It seemed to work, the flow was slowing down. On the giant screen nearby, outside the holo-cylinder, twenty different security feeds started playing, rapidly jumping from room to room, from angle to angle. They showed the garage, the lab, Clint and Sam talking in the kitchen, empty bedrooms, offices with people, the med-bay...

"It's just a side effect," said Tony stepping through the holograms. "I patched some of the lesser systems away from JARVIS' main thinking process. As soon as he solved what ever he's on, they will fall back. Isolate!"

Tony pointed to the air in the middle of the room. Two perfect globes, beach-ball sized, one blue and one orange, constructed by millions of perfect rotating symbols where projected into the air. They were among the most beautiful things Tony had ever seen in his life. 

"What are they?" asked Bruce, rubbing his glasses on his shirt. 

"Pills too big for Jarvis to swallow," Tony enlarged the blue one to the size of the room so the symbols became readable. "Numbers... Are those runes?"

"Aye," Thor pointed to a rotating row. "And that one is Loki'si."

"Sir," said JARVIS. "I must confess that I have received two Moments of Clarity from Loki. I was so intrigued by Dummy's reaction and wanted to try it for myself."

"Oh," Tony put his hands over his face. "You really are sentient. Fuck, I created Skynet."

"So these are magic," Bruce breathed, reverently brushing the light of the orange globe, clearly not grasping what was happening. "Real magic brought down to basic numbers."

Tony was going through an internal struggle. Should he shut JARVIS down? Or was it just his paranoia from watching too many science fiction movies talking? He raked his hair with his fingers. 

Then Thor roared. The whole room sparked with electricity. The holograms blurred, the lights flickered, and the screens turned to the war of the ants. Tony felt his heart jump a beat, which made his chest reactor give him a small electric shot. 

"Don't do that!" Bruce was slightly green at the edges but was managing to breathe it down. 

"There!" Thor pointed manically to an area of the giant screen. "Show that image again! Now!"

"One moment, please," JARVIS sounded strained.

Tony was worried, but that all disappeared when the security feed that Thor had seen filled up the entire screen. 

It was Loki and Jane. They were sitting on a bed in one of the med-bay recovery rooms. Loki had his hands up under Jane's shirt, gently stroking her bare stomach. Both of them were smiling. 

Thor roared again. Tony was speechless. 

"I'm going to bash his head in!" screamed Thor. 

"Wait!" Bruce grabbed hold of his arm before Mjölner had time to be summoned through any fragile equipment. "It's not what you think!"

"Yeah," Tony wasn't jealous, just sad that he didn't know Loki was capable of that kind of touch. 

"He's your brother, Thor," continued Bruce. "You know him for centuries. Isn't this a bit out of character? And Jane, don't you trust her?"

Tony watched the screen as Loki took away his hands from Jane and rubbed them uncomfortably on his trousers. The movement made Tony feel better, the touch hadn't been as comfortable at it had seemed at first. Jane corrected her shirt. They still smiled but now they looked sad. 

There was no sound on but Jane seemed to be speaking encouragingly to Loki, she had a hand on her belly. Tony had a sudden suspicion about what was going on. 

He looked at Bruce, tilted his head and raised an eyebrow in question. Bruce nodded. Confirmed. This thing was getting out of hand. 

"I need to speak to her," Thor clenched his fists and darted for the elevator, Bruce following him. 

"You all right down here, Jarv?" asked Tony, looking around the room. 

It was going to take a couple of minutes for the reroutes and reboots to let the system return to normal throughout the Tower. JARVIS was basically going to be alone until then. 

"You're not going to start converting my suits to terminators?"

"That's sentient computer-profiling, sir," JARVIS sounded amused. 

"Yeah," said Tony hurrying to get on the elevator with Thor and Bruce. "Just tell me if you plan to join U and Butterfingers in taking over the world."

"Will do, sir."

"I don't think you need to worry," said Bruce, though it was unclear if he was talking to Thor, Tony, or himself. 

The ride up to the med-bay was silent, but Tony could feel the fair on his neck prickle because of Thor's electrical tension. 

Steve and Barnes were the only ones in the room when they arrived. Barnes was working the holographic arm that Tony had set up earlier. They seemed to be having fun. Under different circumstances Tony would love to look at it closer, because he could see that it was lagging, but sadly now wasn't the time. 

"Loki!" yelled Thor. 

"Calm down," Tony breathed. 

He had had time to think on the way up, and was now more nervous about his mention of love than confronting Loki about touching Jane. After all, that had its explanation. 

"He's resting," said Jane coming out of the recovery room. "I'm going to start up the machine for him."

Before she had time to take another step Thor had gently embraced her up in his arms. 

"Are you hurt?" he asked. "Have you been injured?"

"What?" 

"I saw Loki touching you. He would only do that if he was healing you."

Thor seemed to have come to his senses on the way up.

"Security footage," said Tony apologetically, glancing behind her to the still open door. "It came up by chance in side-effect loop."

"Oh," Jane leaned her forehead on Thor's chest. 

Steve and Barnes were looking curiously their way. Kingsley and Nat were coming out of the operation room. They didn't look that curious, but then again Nat probably already knew. And who could tell what Kingsley thought behind that mummy-mask of his anyway?

"Maybe..." said Bruce with a sigh "...we should give them some privacy? I'll start up the Freeze-machine. Tony, why don't you check up on Loki?"

"Yeah..." 

Tony hesitated only for a moment before walking past Jane and Thor into the recovery room. He closeed the door behind him. 

Loki was laying on his side on the bed. He looked tired but not hurt, or blue. 

"So..." Tony weighed back on his heals. "Jane's pregnant?"

"Twins," Loki sighed. "It's going to be hard for her."

"But you're going to help, right?" Tony sat down on the bed next to him. 

"I'll need to do some research, but I'll do my best."

Tony nodded. They were quiet for a few seconds. Tony was at a loss for words. He wanted to ask Loki about the spells he had given JARVIS, and his reactions to the blurted confession. Thor's celebratory roar from outside the room made them both jump. 

"I guess I have to throw another party," said Tony with half a smile. 

"Fool," grunted Loki.

"How are you feeling?"

"Very tired, but otherwise I don't know." He scooted to over to lay on his back, making more room for Tony on the bed. "Maybe I should give myself a Clarity. But then I won't have the strength to assist with Barnes' surgery."

"I don't think Steve would allow you to do that before you rested anyway." Tony hesitated. "Would it work on you? You said you adjusted it to humans, and robots apparently."

"I'm scared of what I might find out." Loki turned his head to face Tony. "I trust magic with my life, it will always show me the truth. It's people who lie."

Tony's gut clenched. He knew that he had to tell Loki sooner than later. Preferably sooner, and before Loki found out for himself. 

"I saw what you gave JARVIS," he said as a distraction. "It was beautiful."

"Did you like it?"

"Yes. Though I'm a bit worried about JARVIS taking over the world."

"I don't believe he has the ambition," Loki smiled at the ceiling. "He takes after you."

"Hey, I would be an awesome super-villain."

Loki laughed as if he didn't believe him. 

He looked absolutely gorgeous, and it warmed Tony's torn heart. Maybe this falling in love business was sneaking up on him after all. 

Tony took a deep breath. It was time to tell the truth. Now or never. Loki was weakened state, pretty, and in a good mood. 

"I lied," he said. "I got an intellectual Clarity. The sequence is every other."


	18. Hanging on

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki reacts to Tony's lie and contemplates the consequences.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Should I warn for blood? I have written about blood before, there's not a lot more blood, in this chapter, just a little more...
> 
> Two more chapters and an epilogue after this. There might be a sequel but, fair warning, my ideas for that have a bit of a 'crack' nature.

If Loki hadn't been laying down on the bed he would have thrown Anthony out the small curtained window. As it were, he just kicked the human in the back propelling him down on the floor with a painful-sounding thud. 

Loki followed, getting to his feet and lifting the groaning man by the neck of his shirt and then propelling him out through the door onto the floor of the next room. There were several surprised shouts but Loki ignored them all as he continued to follow, gathering whatever what was left of his drained magic he could muster as he walked. 

There was a surprisingly amount left in him as his anger overrode his fatigue.

"Fuck," Anthony groaned, his nose was bleeding, he must have landed on his face. 

Loki didn't really care. He clenched his fists and continued to advance. 

He was stopped by two huge and green arms crossing over his chest and holding him still against an equally huge and green chest. He struggled even though he knew it was futile, kicking his legs against the Hulk's unmovable trunk-like legs. 

Thor was shouting something but Loki still didn't listen. He was focused on Anthony and the red blood running down the human's face. Rogers had rushed forward and was helping Anthony to his feet. 

"Loki," Anthony wiped his nose on his sleeve, it didn't stop the bleeding. "Babe, listen..."

"You lied to me!" Loki screamed, feeling the ice around his wound break and his fingers turning blue. 

"You're the goddamn god of lies!" Anthony screamed back. "You couldn't possibly be that naïve!"

"You think I'm naive?" Loki breathed in, drawing strength from the irritation of Hulk's touch around his body. "Is that why you have been calling me 'babe' all this time? You lied to me! And because I didn't see, you have been taunting it to my face?"

"'Babe'? Goddamn it! No!"

"You said you loved me!"

"Well, not in so many words..." 

"Tony!" yelled Rogers. 

"He deserves the truth," argued Anthony. "I was like... building up to it, love. I do like you, Lokes, I do. And you are very pretty when you are angry..."

"You should shut up now," said Rogers. 

"I'm going to gauge your eyes out with my bare fingers and fill the sockets with venom!"

Yeah, Loki had read the Norse tails and knew how to improve on them. It would be a shame on such pretty eyes as Anthony's, but that's just another sacrifice that Loki would have to do. He again struggled futilely against the green beast's arms. 

"Tony, go," rumbled Hulk from above him, Loki could feel the reverberations of the voice through his back. "Getting cold."

Yes, Loki was getting cold, but he couldn't feel it himself. He knew his jotun nature had taken over by the changed sharpness of his sight and how the blood running down his thigh was now frozen. He also knew it by the way Thor protected Jane from him. 

Was Thor going to use Loki as an example when he told his children cautionary bedtime stories about Jotuns? _'Come on, brother. Show them what to be afraid of!'_

Loki screamed out his frustration. In a fusion of desperate magic and pure anger Loki sent a hard frostbite through Hulk's arms. The monster roared and shifted in pain. It was enough to break free and Loki burst forward. 

So Anthony had lied to him? Let him lie his way through this! Another Moment of Clarity, this one was to be the original kind, the one not moderated for weak humans. Anthony would know how much he had hurt Loki, he would know what broken trust after a millennia of searching for it felt like. 

Loki surged forward, his hands stretched out before him like a batting ram. He focused on nothing besides the spell and the human's bleeding face. This Clarity was not going to be pleasant. It was going to be the original, the one not moderated to fit weak human minds. Anthony would know for the rest of his short life how it felt to have trust been torn away from you after searching millennia for it. 

"No!" 

Thor pushed away both Anthony and Rogers, and caught all of Loki's seething rage right in his chest. The spell flashed with a blinding ice-blue light as it made contact. The large man gasped and fell to his knees. Jane screamed. 

Loki was again caught by two large green arms and pulled back, but this time he had no fight left in him. He was well and totally spent. 

"You damned fool!" he breathed. 

Thor convulsed, but he was still able to hold out a hand towards Jane, urging her to stay away. She stopped in he middle of her run towards him. 

"We need to get you out of here, Tony," Rogers more or less lifted Anthony in his arms as he pushed him towards the elevator. 

Loki breathed hard as he turned his gaze from Thor to Anthony being taken away. 

"Jane," rasped Thor through strained breath. "You go with him."

"You too, Nat," said Rogers. "Come on!"

"Like fuck I will," said Romanoff and stabbed down four of Kingsley's syringes in Loki's right thigh.

It hurt more than Loki was able to comprehend. He didn't even have time to scream before he was overwhelmed by the pain and lost consciousness. 

\----

Loki woke up in Anthony's bedroom. Why was he still calling him 'Anthony'?

Because he still couldn't help but to care. Anthony had woken something inside him and Loki couldn't look away from that. Anthony had lied, yes, but he had also shown to care about Loki. 

He deeply feared the admission that this had been a lie as well. 

Loki was on his back under a soft cover up to his armpits. His arms and shoulders were bare, with pale skin, and resting to his sides. Someone had removed his clothes, he was naked under the covers. He hoped it was because he had bled on them and not because of anything else. There were no restrictions which was a bit surprising. 

His head hurt, so did his gut, wound, and of course his thigh. Someone was going to suffer badly for that. Most likely that would be Anthony since Loki hadn't the patience of waiting of nine months to curse Romanoff with something nasty.

Then he remembered Thor. His gut clenched even more painfully. He wasn't that worried about any physical harm that could have come to the brute, but he was unsure about the rest. If Thor had been human, that was to say Anthony who the spell was originally meant for, then he'd might gone insane. As it were, Moments of Clarities affected Asgardians quite differently. 

Loki tried to move, but whatever drug they had poisoned him with was still holding him down. That and the more than usual tiredness and pains. 

"Welcome back," said Banner from beside him. 

"I was wondering why I wasn't tied down," said Loki slowly turning his head to look at the doctor. "But with you watching over me, and my apparent weakness, there seems to be no need for anything else."

"I only took up watch about ten minutes ago," Banner looked at his clock. "You've been unconscious for about six hours. "Steve was here before me."

"Thor?"

"He's fine," Banner assured. "He's the one that carried you here."

Loki pretended not to feel any relief. Thor was always made of tougher material than expected. 

"He hasn't told us yet what his Clarity was though, it was emotional right?"

"It works differently with Asgardians," Loki looked at his hands. "There's no difference between emotional and intellectual, and a unmoderated one would have given him a _Vision_ of Clarity, not a Moment."

"What's the difference?" Banner adjusted his glasses. 

"Among other things, greater understanding for the consequences of your actions." 

"What would have happened to Tony if he got it?"

"He would have gone insane..." 

There was a moment of silence. Loki studied his fingers on the top of the covers. 

"How is Anthony?" he tried not to sound too interested. 

Banner smiled knowingly, he was smart, he noticed the 'Anthony'-thing. Loki frowned at himself. Why couldn't he let the familiarity go? 

"In the floor nine lab. The SHEILD techs needs a bit of supervision. He's been checking in on you constantly though. You broke his nose."

Loki felt a bit of satisfaction over this, though not nearly enough. He sighed and looked Banner over. 

"You lied to me as well."

"I did," Banner nodded solemnly. "Partly because I wanted to protect Tony, but partly also because of you."

"Me? So I wouldn't go off on a killing-spree? You can relax. I'm not into those anymore."

"No," Banner held his gaze. "Because you showed me some things about loneliness. And..." He took a strained breath. "I'm actually glad that I lied to you, because I got to go on a date with Darcy. I don't think we're going to keep dating, but she made me realise that I don't have to shy away from others."

Loki just huffed. He couldn't argue against that even though he wanted to.

"Where all of you covering for him?" 

"Yes," Banner sighed. "Eventually, though some of us he didn't tell right away."

That explained the Captain's attitude from before. 

"We're going to let you back in the freeze-machine when we know you've calmed down. I understand if you want to leave. You don't have to see Tony, but we still would appreciate your help with Bucky."

"Where else can I go?" Loki stared at the ceiling again and the light-fixtures there. "This is the only place I'm truly safe."

That was more true than he liked to admit. He wouldn't last long by himself. Thanos was still out there. So where those of Asgard who were asking for his blood. All his other safe havens were gone, all his bridges were burned, and he he had played everything on one card. 

These Midgardian similarities were going to be the death of him, if the tiredness didn't do him in first. 

"Also, I made a promise to Romanoff and Jane..." Loki paused. "Who undressed me?"

"Me and Thor," Banner gave a small blush. "Nobody else was in the room."

Loki nodded, he knew that Anthony was watching him through the security. He is only knew the location of one of the hidden cameras, a light fixture next to the television, and he glared at it with silent threats. Anthony might still be a familiar, but he was not safe. They were going to have an intensive talk. 

"Rest," said Banner. "I'll get you something to eat, and then we'll go down to the med bay, yeah?" Banner hesitated for a moment. "And you might want to see this."

Banner handed Loki a small portable computer, a Starkpad, which Loki took with slightly shaky hands, before leaving the room. He remembered how early he had broken the herald's machine, this he could barely hold. Loki looked at the screen.

'Iron Man is taken!' it said in big letters. 'Billionaire Tony Stark proclaims himself officially off the market as he reveals a romantic relationship with Brother of Thor.'

Loki huffed. _Brother of Thor_. The picture isn't too bad though, even if Anthony looked entirely too smug and Loki too adoring. No, not adoring. Desperate. 

He frowned again. What had that human reduced him to? And in just a few days? He had been willing to send the human into madness with that spell. What did that say about him? Before he came here he had been so confident with his then given lot in life. How could one human destroy it all so quickly?

He thoughtfully touched the image and then pulled his hand away when it stated to move. The herald's recording seemed to have been saved. 

_"It is a whole new experience,"_ said Anthony's voice from the device. _He's like no other man I ever gotten close to. He's making me reevaluate the important things my life."_

Anthony was talking about sex. Loki remembered hearing the words at the time but hadn't made the connection. It was quite clear now. 

Loki touched the screen and it stopped moving. He read through the text by moving it upwards with his finger. Judging by the numbers at the bottom of the screen more than five million people had already seen it, and it was still increasing. Anthony's lie was now spreading rapidly across Midgard. 

He looked up as the door opened and Darcy entered with two large steaming cups, one in each hand. 

"Hiya," she smiled. "Tea and chicken soup, breakfast of champions. Well, supper of champions. Ha! Steve made it, so it's Super Supper Soup."

"Just give it to me," sighed Loki. 

She placed the cup with the tea on the small table next to the bed before removing the Starkpad from Loki's hands and giving him the soup. The cup was pleasantly warm and he gripped it tightly. 

"How are you feeling?" asked Darcy looking over the Starkpad, making some quick touches to the screen. "I saw the footage. That was quite a breakdown you had. Good thing Thor was there to take the blast."

"It wasn't a breakdown," Loki sipped the soup, it had some spices in it that he didn't recognise, but it tasted good. "I was being lied to."

"You know," Darcy sat down on the side of the bed, still playing around with the small machine. "For someone who has made several names for himself by dealing with lies you are not good at handling them."

"Those are all names given to me out of spite or jealousy, I will not be blamed for making them my own to ease the pain of their sting." He took some more of the soup. "You were lied to as well."

"Yeah," she looked up from the screen and made disliking face. "But I have had dates based on worse things. It's not optimal, but I like to think he wouldn't have asked me out if there wasn't something he liked about me. Maybe it was the same with Tony."

"Oh, I know there was. I know exactly why he lied," Loki took a long drink of the soup to finish it up, it would have been poetic if it had tasted bitter, but it didn't. "He found me attractive and wanted to have sex with me."

The machine in Darcy's hands made a sound like a small bell, she looked at the screen and bit her lower lip. 

"And I would have forgiven him for that," Loki continued bitterly. "Many others have made that mistake before him, too many times. Though what I can't forgive, is that when he found he couldn't override my affliction he continued to pursue me."

"I think he wanted to find out if you had an hidden agenda."

"Through pillow-talk."

Darcy frowned but didn't argue. Loki gestured for the teacup. She got up and exchanged it for the empty soup cup in his hands. 

The tea tasted of soothing herbs. Loki looked purposely straight at the hidden camera next to the large television as he drank. He was sure Anthony was on the other side looking back. 

The Starkpad made a small noise like a bell again and Darcy shifted back her attention to it. 

"He says he's sorry," she said, or rather read out loud from what ever message Anthony was sending her. "And he doesn't think you have an affliction."

"I don't want to talk to him, even less through someone else."

There was a moment of silence. Loki almost expected Anthony to send them a new message, but there was none. The human had learned his lesson, this one at least. 

"So..." Darcy pursed her lips as he inhaled a long breath. "Jane's preggo, eh? Should have seen that coming. They're at it like rabbits."

"I did not need to know that," Loki shivered, though he was happy for the change of subject. 

"That's Natasha and Jane," she gave him a humorous look. "You're giving me and Maria fair warning, right?"

"Since you are with Banner, and Hill is not into men, I think you are both safe at the moment."

"Yeah, but I'm sure you could magically find your way around that."

She didn't deny being with Banner. 

"Of course," Loki grinned. "But I'm not going to."

"Great. I like kids, sure, but I don't want any spawnlings of my own. I'm more like the cool aunty type, you know. An aunty with a killer-figure and just enough stretch marks."

Loki laughed, it hurt but it was worth it. Darcy gave him a wink. 

Banner and Rogers entered the room. Thor was there as well but he waited outside the threshold, Loki avoided looking at him. He set his eyes on Rogers instead, the soldier was probably sad that the surgery of his friend was continuing to be postponed. 

"Brother," Thor said apologetically and hesitantly entered the room. "I'm sorry I withheld the truth from you. But I thought it not mine to tell. I did ask him not to take long before telling."

"W-what did you see?" Loki didn't quite manage to hide the tremble in his voice. 

"I saw you, Loki." Thor sighed. "I saw my brother, not the Jotun. I have always knewn in my heart you are not a monster, but now I know it in my mind was well."

Loki took a breath. It was probably hard not to look any weaker than he did at that moment, but tears would definitely push him over the edge. He forced an accusing look on his face that most likely didn't fool anyone. 

"But you still told Jane to get away from me."

"To be fair," said Banner with half a smile. "You were acting up, and you had just broken Tony's nose, and you were planning to turn him insane."

"I wasn't _planning_ anything!" Loki tried to scream but his words ended in a whimper as his head was splitting with pain. "Ugh."

"We're taking you down to the machine, now," Banner folded away the covers, they had a few bloodstains on them. "Eh, maybe a pair of trousers?"

Loki looked down at his bare right thigh. It was blue, but not jotun-blue, more of a purple not unlike the wound in his gut. The syringes had also left four irritated red welts on his skin. Just the sight of it made it more painful. Romanoff was so lucky she was pregnant. 

Darcy helped him on with a pair of Anthony's soft grey trousers, they were too short but adequate. It was very frustrating pulling them on because he had no movement what so ever in his right leg, not even his toes moved. His other leg felt weak and unsupportive. 

Damn it, he would have to be carried. 

"Not you!" Loki hissed as Thor made a move to help him up. "I'm still mad at you. Him."

He pointed at Rogers who, understandably, seemed shocked. The fact was though that he was the only one of the other three with the strength to carry Loki, without it the Hulk coming out and that was to be avoided. The captain recovered quickly and hurried forward. Loki looked over the man's big arms. They were very nice to look at, but them touching him would be a different matter all together. This wasn't going to be pleasant. Deep breaths. 

The Starkpad rang again, Darcy looked at it. 

"Tony's sending a wheelchair up in the elevator," she said and smiled at Loki. "See? He cares. Isn't that sweet?"

Loki huffed and crossed his arms. He was quite relived though. Not that he would ever thank Anthony. It was still his fault Loki was in this mess in the first place, and Loki would have revenge.


	19. Respite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony suffers the results of Loki's anger and gets some advice.

\-------- 

"You're spying on him?" 

Tony made a fake offended movement as he momentarily looked up from his the small screen on his phone to Rhodey. His friend had arrived less than five minutes ago and was already dropping truth-bombs all around him, most of them bearing a resemblance to 'I told you so'. 

"It's not spying if he knows I'm watching." 

Tony turned back to the phone, where Loki was shown being disgracefully helped into the wheelchair by Steve. Loki cringed all over from the touch. Tony gave a bitter half-smirk, the guy had not calculated the slightly higher temperature of Steve's skin, which came with increased metabolism, when he asked for his assistance. 

"I was surprised that he didn't do a worse number on you," said Rhodey. "You were lucky Thor was is there. If anyone else had protected you'd probably both be toast."

"Yeah," Tony sighed again and winced with pain. "I was lucky..."

He was bearing a strange resemble to Kingsley at the moment. A small brace was well taped over his still swollen nose. Several small plasters adorned his face, the largest one over his left eyebrow where he had needed three strips of tape to keep it together. The worst was his two black eyes that was giving him a distinctive racoon-look, which might look sexy on Barnes but did nothing for Tony. 

"You should take your painkillers," Rhodey held out the small plastic pillbox that Bruce had given him on arrival to make Tony take them. 

"I'm getting used to it," Tony pushed his hand away. "What if he wants to talk to me? I can't be drugged up when I do that, I have little control over my mouth as it is. Anyway," he gestured to the room of SHEILD scientists behind him. "They need me here."

"When was the last time you slept?" 

"I don't need sleep. I need to be here. Finding a cure."

"What cure?" Rhodey started to sound irritated. "You said it yourself that the numbers show that if Loki spends enough time in that freezer-thing he will be healed. That's your cure, Tony, not this alien mumbo-jumbo."

"Did you just say 'mumbo-jumbo'?"

"Yes, and shut up," Rhodey gave him an amused look. "What about the freezer?"

"The freeze-machine takes time," Tony stopped himself in time before rubbing his face. "Time that could be used for better things."

"It's healing, Tony, it takes time. Remember when I broke my leg and had to lie in bed for two weeks? You were so bored, but you waited."

Tony remembered. It was almost twenty-five years ago. He had dragged Rhodey to a motorcycle derby for his twentieth birthday and challenged him to a high-speed race. Even though they could laugh at it now, Tony still blamed himself for the accident. 

"Only because you refused to try on my mechanical brace."

"You wanted me to go skiing! I would have broken my other leg as well."

They chuckled, bumping their shoulders together. 

Tony looked down on his phone as the others put Loki in the freeze-machine. He sighed yet again. There wasn't going to be a talk any time soon. 

"Fine," he put the phone away in his pocket. "I'll take the godawful pills and a rest. I just need to look over what everyone is doing before..."

"Tony," Rhodey took hold of his arm. "These people are professionals, they have it under control. I'm taking you to bed right now."

"Sorry, I already have a boyfriend. Or at least I think I do..." he let himself be ushered towards the elevator. "Did you hear him still calling me 'Anthony'? That's a good sign right?"

Rhodey stopped in his tracks and stared at him like he had grown a second, more handsome, head. 

"You... You're still going to be with him?"

"Sure I am," Tony shrugged. "If he still wants me. I've been trying to fall in love with him, you just think that's something I could abandon just like that? This is a serious commitment. It's going to be hard with the no-touching thing, but I can get around that. Maybe he would agree to watch me while I..."

"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" Rhodey began to push him. 

Tony laughed until his whole face hurt even more. 

\------- 

Some amount of time later Tony was high as the day of his parents' funeral. 

He had escaped downstairs from his room where Rhodey had left him to sleep. The sheets still had stains of Loki's blood, it didn't feel good laying on them once he had woken up. 

Tony had logically chosen the benefit of the better position of sitting by the table, leaning forward with his head against the crack Loki that had made with his horns earlier. Somehow the indentation felt good against his forehead. 

He knew he had had a purpose coming into the kitchen in he first place, but he'd be damned if he could remember it. He had seen the crack in the table and been distracted. Perhaps it was to have something to drink, his throat was very dry. 

A scotch would be perfect just about now. 

"Sir?" asked JARVIS' familiar voice. "Should I ask someone to come and assist you?"

"No, I'm fine," hummed Tony, feeling pretty content with his new life on hunched over the table. 

"Sir, I must inform you that due to the emotional Clarity I was given by Loki, I am now much more capable of doing so called 'judgement calls' when overriding your protocols, and therefore I will ask for someone to come and help you."

"Can it be Loki?" Tony rolled his head so his cheek was against the crack instead (there was a joke in there somewhere). 

This position was nice too, he could look out of he window this way. 

"Loki is asleep, sir. Also, for the sake of your own safety, I would not recommend you seeing him at the moment."

"Bummer. I really need to talk to him."

Tony took a few breaths, watching the wooden grain of the table. It must be evening since the light reflecting from the large windows were more artificial than natural. New York took on a more orange light after sunset. It was pretty. Tony sighed and enjoyed the lightness of his head. 

"Jarv?"

"Yes, sir?"

"You're not becoming terminator right?"

"No, sir. The best way for me to take over the world would not be by force and terror. According to the calculations I was able to devise from my second Clarity, Stark Industries will be more or less owning the world by the year 2265. I can wait."

Tony wasn't sure if this was a joke or not. Either way, he guessed he had time to let it go for now, especially since he wasn't no state of doing anything about it. 

Dummy, who had been standing in the corner hooked up to the power outlet, moved to life. If Tony's senses hadn't been numbed off he would have been startled, as it were he just looked at the bot with slight surprise and amusement. 

"Hey, Buddy! You gonna help daddy?" 

The robot made a happy sound and stretched out his head towards Tony, nestling it in under his armpit. Tony laughed and let himself be brought to his feet by the gentle strength of the machine. 

"Can we go over there?" Tony gestured towards the bar. 

"No, sir," said JARVIS. "The others are still down in the med-bay, Dummy's taking you there."

"I thought you said I couldn't meet Loki!"

"He will not wake up for several hours, sir. It will be perfectly safe."

"Where have I heard that before?"

Dummy steered him towards the elevator, Tony had no choice but to follow. 

"Why are they always hanging out in the med-bay? They have this floor, the game-room, the gym, the... What else do they have, Jarv?"

"Their own rooms, sir?"

"Yeah! We could have sleepovers!"

The feeling of moving downwards did not help Tony with his chemically induced lightheadedness. He's knees buckled slightly and Dummy had to help him from not falling over. The robot chirped encouragingly. 

As they arrived to the med-bay Tony hesitated. JARVIS had said Loki was sleeping, but the alien was still in there. Dummy gave him a friendly push.

Natasha, Darcy and Barnes were sitting by a table in the small kitchenette, each with a cup of something steaming. Barnes had a bulky blanket draped over his shoulders to hide his missing arm. Darcy was texting. 

They was watching a TV-news report. A female reporter was interviewing Captain America, of all people, who was calmly telling her that he was just there to help out, and that the city was not under any kind of threat. 

This was probably something Tony should care about, but his thoughts went elsewhere. 

Tony glanced over at the Freeze-machine, it had more screens, detectors, and measuring equipment attached to it than before. Jane was standing next to it, writing down some of the readings in a notebook. 

He saw a thermo-image of Loki on one of the screens, it was completely blue, as if it was monitoring a dead body. Tony shuddered and fought the impulse of rushing forward, opening the machine, and feel Loki's pulse even though the machines clearly showed a heartbeat. Also, Loki wouldn't appreciate it. 

"Tony?" asked Darcy, turning to look at him. "What are you doing here?"

Both she and Nat got up from the table and hurried over to the elevator. Dummy greeted them with a small waive and a R2D2-beep. 

"Sightseeing?"

"Wallowing in self-pity more likely," said Nat leaning against the doorframe. 

"You're bleeding." Darcy frowned. "We need to change some of your bandages. You shouldn't put pressure on them, or you'll going to need real stitches."

"It's less than I deserve."

Darcy stoked his cheek, but Tony was too numb to feel it. 

"Where's everybody?"

"There's was a big gas-explosion," Nat explained. "Down by the docks about an hour ago. Nothing sinister as far as we can tell, most likely some old machinery malfunctioning, but everyone that is not decommissioned, or Darcy, have gone down to check it out, and help with any casualties."

"Am I decommissioned or Darcy?" Tony huffed as he again had to lean against Dummy not to fall over. 

"Yes," said Darcy. 

"Can I be Darcy? Because that would be great. I would have Bruce as my boyfriend and not be in trouble with a magical alien."

With combined help from the two women, and the support of Dummy's trusty wheel-arch, he managed to find his feet. He wobbled slightly.

"You're not," Nat smirked. "Anyway, I don't think it's going to work out between Bruce and her." 

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," Darcy laughed. 

"Reverse psychology. I'm going to be a mother soon, got to practice."

"Ten bucks," said Tony. 

"Ooh, I've never been bet on before," Darcy giggled. 

"I get most of my money from you anyway," Nat shrugged as they exited the cabin. "So if I loose you'll just be paying yourself."

One of the computers monitoring Loki made a sudden beeping sound. Tony paused abruptly, which made all three of them almost loose balance because Dummy just kept on moving. 

"Loki?" 

"I'm just using the printer," Jane called to him assuringly. "According to both Bruce and Kingsley he won't be waking up until morning."

Tony let the women start walking again. Dummy now followed them like a devoted puppy. 

"We need to talk about that reporter from before," said Darcy as Tony was seated next to Barnes, who had been carefully watching their progress. "I said we would compensate him for damages, but he said he had a superhero-friend that he wanted you to meet, and you are completely gone on painkillers right now and have no idea what I'm talking about."

Tony looked at her and agreed when all he could focus on was the redness of her lipstick. It was the same colour that Loki's eyes had turned into when he changed to his ice-alien form. Tony wished he had kept some of the pictures of Loki changing. 

Dummy was casually rolling over to the Freeze-machine to, seemingly, take a closer look. Tony wanted to follow, but Natasha manhandled him to stay put in the chair. She was going to be such a good mother. 

"Let me look at your face."

"Am I still handsome?" 

"That would imply that I thought you handsome to begin with," Nat deadpanned. 

Barnes didn't smile, but he made a sound which was enough to imply that it had been funny. Darcy smirked, held up her phone, and took Tony's picture. 

"I'm sending this to Pepper," she said with a smirk. "She wanted pictures."

"You're all so cruel," said Tony and pouted until he could feel pain in his lips. "You're in contact with Pepper?"

"Of course I am," Darcy rolled her eyes. "Do you honestly think that shepherding you is something I learn in a day?" 

Tony took up his pillbox from his pocket and started struggling with the childproof lid. Nat took it away from him and put it on the table. Tony pouted even more but that only made the pain in his lip worse. 

"If you have any more of those you'll loose consciousness," Nat put a strip of new tape over his right eyebrow. 

"Maybe that's a good thing," muttered Tony. 

Jane came over, spreading out her handwritten notes out on the table. Tony tried to glance at them over but Nat was adamant about him facing her while cleaning him.

"He's doing well," said Jane. "But the two of you should have a long talk alone when he gets out."

Even more incentive for being unconscious, thought Tony as he jealously watched Barnes opening the pillbox with his teeth, shook a few pills out, and popped them in his mouth. Neither of the three women tried to stop him, which was quite unfair. 

"He's going to come out of there with a bunch of rebooted magic and shit," said Tony. "If I'm left alone with him he's going to turn me into a toad or something."

"Not if you are honest with him," Jane looked up from her notes. "He likes you, he told me so before he kicked your ass. It's only logical, if he didn't like you he wouldn't feel as betrayed as he does."

"That's some screwed up logic," Nat was packing away the medical equipment. "But he's Loki, so it makes sense."

"He still calls you 'Anthony'," nodded Darcy. "You just have to make it up to him."

"Maybe you should ask for a new Clarity," said Barnes still holding the pillbox. "Do it right this time."

Tony was seriously loosing his buzz from the pills. He really needed a drink. The television showed Steve and Sam talking to a couple of firemen, pointing to different places in the rubble. 

_"We are noticing the absence of Iron Man..."_ said the studio-anchorman to the reporter on the scene. _...is there any connection to the earlier news today of his engagement?"_

_"I did ask about about that,"_ the reporter answered. _"Understandably this accident takes priority, but it seems that Mr. Stark has sustained a minor injury and was unable to join the team."_

"'Engagement'?!" croaked Tony. 

"Congratulations," smirked Nat. 

"Have you proposed to him?!" Jane almost screamed, actually managing to scare Tony. 

"No!" 

"Don't do this to me," Darcy placed a hand on her chest. "I can't be having a heart attack at twenty-nine." She took a calming breath but jumped when her phone started ringing. "Hi, Pepper, no they are not engaged... Wait a moment, I need to go somewhere more private."

She stood up, pointing to her eyes with her index-finger and middle-finger then turning the fingers to Tony and then back to her eyes, hauled her big bag over her shoulder, and walked over to one of the recovery rooms. 

Tony stopped himself before rubbing his face. This was moving entirely too fast. The press was planning his wedding. All he had confessed to was going out steady. He hadn't even apologised to Loki yet. He didn't even know if he was to be forgiven or turned into a frog. Perhaps he could invest in a nice pond. 

_"Well..."_ said a dark-haired woman in a business suit on the television, taking part of what seemed like a studio panel-debate. _Stark will be celebrating his forty-fifth birthday this year, and his conquests keep getting younger. Let's see if he had the strength to keep up."_

Tony vaguely remembered dating her for a week or so a few years back, before Afghanistan. He had dumped her, for a younger woman. He wondered how many of her kind that was out there, ready to strike. 

_"And more male,"_ she continued. _"Which doesn't surprise me one bit from my experience with him."_

"Vindictive bitch," said Natasha and changed the channel to another, less biased, news-broadcast.

Tony rubbed his face. He hissed in pain as he nudged his nose. Barnes have him a look, looked over Tony's shoulder, and scooted over the pillbox to him. 

This time Nat let him take one, though she rolled her eyes as he did. He swallowed it down with some cold tea. 

"Oh," said Jane in surprise. 

"Anthony?" A shaky, but still very familiar, voice came from behind Tony. 

"Sir," said JARVIS. "I must inform you that Dummy has awoken Loki and assisted him out of the machine."


	20. Resolution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki and Tony have their talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was hard to write, but there are some loose ends that needs tying up. There will be an epilogue and you won't have to wait a week for it, just a few days ;p

Loki had known that it was too early to get out of the machine. He didn't feel anywhere near recovered and some parts of his body were still aching, his gut and right thigh especially. 

He had only intended to give the affectionate robot a kind pat on its head and then call for someone to restart the machine so he could go back to his rest, but then he had heard Anthony's voice. It sounded tired and a bit slurred, and talking about Loki turning him into a toad. 

It was actually not a bad idea, even though that kind of magic didn't exist outside fairytales. The closest thing Loki could manage to do was to make Anthony _think_ that he was a toad, but that would defeat the purpose since toads didn't have the mental capacity to feel regret or shame. 

Loki was surprised to hear that the heralds on the television thought him engaged to Anthony. That only showed the strength of the lie. As a representative of lies Loki couldn't help but to be impressed, though it did not ease the pain of it all. After all him being a representative was only a honorary title without the honour. 

There were probably better moments in he could confront Anthony but Loki didn't feel like waiting now that he was awake and the opportunity was close by. His legs were relatively cooperative as he stepped down to the floor. He steadied himself momentarily on the robot but quickly found his balance and started walking without assistance. 

The robot followed him closely though, seemingly ready to catch him if he might fall. Loki wondered why JARVIS hadn't said something yet, the intelligence would most certainly had noticed something by now and alerted Anthony of possible danger. 

Barnes, Jane, and Romanoff made eye contact with him as he approached. Anthony was oblivious and swallowed down something with some tea. 

"Anthony?" said Loki, his voice somewhat betraying his emotion. 

"Sir," said JARVIS. "I must inform you that Dummy has awoken Loki and assisted him out of the machine."

The human froze for a moment. 

"Isn't that just great? He's right behind me, isn't he?"

The other humans nodded. 

"Fucking judgement calls..."

Anthony turned around. His eyes were surrounded by black and blue bruises, his nose was red, swollen and bandaged, and his left eyebrow was cut. Loki frowned at the sight, even though he couldn't help but to feel some satisfaction as well.

"H-hey?" Anthony looked Loki over, pausing momentarily on his stomach. "How you feelin'?"

Loki was suddenly aware that he was naked except for the too short grey trousers that Darcy had helped him on with earlier, slightly stained with blood. His wound was frozen over with fresh ice but it would not be a pretty sight with the perpetual bruising.

"Better," Loki answered slowly and turned to glare at Romanoff. "Angry." 

She met his eyes without affection and shrugged. Whatever she felt, she didn't feel any shame over what she'd done to him. Loki huffed and turned back to Anthony, who judging by the state of his eyes was clearly drugged. Probably with something to ease the pain of his injuries. 

Humans had it easy. 

"You shouldn't be up," said Jane rising from the table and walking over to him. "You're only halfway through your recovery."

"I'm well enough to talk."

"Can we do this when I'm not stoned?" Anthony tried to give a charming smile but mostly just managed to look pathetic. "Maybe over a drink, after a nice quiet dinner and a movie? Do you want to go on a date, is what i think I'm basically saying. Tomorrow?"

"No, I want to talk. You are so lucky that's all I want to do right now."

That wasn't quite all true, he wanted to hit something, but Loki had calmed down enough to realise a change in tactics was necessary. Also, Anthony's altered state of mind would probably work in advantage since the human couldn't as easily hide his lies with his intellect. 

"Fine," Anthony sighed and avoided rubbing himself in the face at the last moment. "But let's go upstairs, too many spies around here."

"Like I could follow you if I wanted to," huffed Romanoff. 

"Pregnant women shouldn't crawl around in air ducts." 

"Yet another thing I'm missing out on," she sourly put her elbows on the table and her head in her hands. 

"Shit," Anthony wobbled as he rose. "I don't think I can walk." 

The robot hurried forward and offered his long arm. Anthony gratefully leaned on the contraption. Loki didn't want to feel sorry for him, but he did, but only a bit. 

"Loki?"

Barnes got up and handed Loki the blanket he had had wrapped around his shoulders. Loki accepted it hesitantly. He looked at the exposed metal joint perturbing from the scared flesh of his missing shoulder, the soldier shrugged. 

"The sooner you feel better, the sooner I can have this fixed."

"Thank you," Loki nodded and followed Anthony to the elevator. 

He felt a bit bad for letting the surgery be postponed, but then again, that was another thing they could blame on Anthony. He was looking forward to seeing the metallic arm in action though. 

Darcy came out from one of the smaller rooms, Loki smiled as he passed her. She looked surprised that he was out but didn't say anything and smiled back. 

The ride up was quiet. Anthony was leaning heavily on the robot. He seemed to try to avoid looking at Loki but their eyes kept meeting, which consequently meant that Loki couldn't help looking back. Loki tightened the blanket around himself, he was tired and wanted to go back to sleep. 

"I'm sorry," said Anthony as the doors opened on the common room floor. 

"I know that you are," Loki sighed. "But that doesn't make it better."

"No!" Anthony suddenly shouted, Loki jumped but calmed down when he realised that the human had been talking to the robot. "You've done enough for one night. Go down to the lab. We're having a private conversation."

"Don't be too hard on him," said Loki. "He didn't know what he was doing when he woke me up."

"Oh, he knew."

Dummy made a strange sad sound, but relented and reversed back into the elevator. 

"That means you too, Jarv," Anthony was holding on to different furniture as he wavered towards the group of sofas by the large windows. "None of your new 'judgement calls'." 

"Of course, sir."

Anthony sat down with a deep sigh. His eyes strayed towards the bar, but seemed to decide that he wasn't going to get up again. Probably a good decision. 

"Come on, babe," he said. "Let's finish this little powwow before I pass out."

"Don't call me that," Loki limped to seat himself on the sofa opposite from Tony. 

"It's a term of affection."

"Then I shall call you 'infant'."

"Not the best term of affection I've heard, but I'll take it." 

Loki couldn't help himself from smiling. What was with this human that made him see past all his anger and feelings of betrayal? One bad joke and for a short moment everything was like before. It was a pity that Anthony couldn't use the full extent of his charm while wearing the Iron Man suit, then his weapons would really be invincible. Loki shook his head at his own folly. 

"Darcy had the same colour on her lipstick as your eyes when you were frosty," Anthony was leaning his head back, his eyes halfway closed. "That was so cool. You broke my table. I gotta buy a new one now."

"You- you remember my eyes?"

"Maybe I should ask her for a colour sample so I can paint my suit in it. I love that fucking red JARVIS, make a note."

"Am I allowed to listen now, sir?" asked the Intelligence. 

"No, shut up."

Loki felt strangely touched. 

"You know, babe?" Anthony lay down on his back on the sofa. "I'm glad I lied."

"You what?" Loki bristled. 

"Because then I got to know you, like Bruce said. I honestly wouldn't have bothered if I made a move on you if you had rejected me again. I know how to take no for an answer. Most of the time anyway."

"When did I reject you?"

"You threw me out of a window," the human glared at him momentarily before laying his head back down. "It was a helluva rejection."

Loki sighed. If that had been flirtation back then, they had both been way off the mark. Again with these infernal Midgardian expressions!

"It wasn't all a lie," said Anthony. "Just the beginning."

There was a long moment of silence. Anthony's eyes were closed. Loki looked towards the now mended window and the city on the other side. Earth was a dark place outlined by light, Asgard was light outlined by darkness. It was a metaphor for something but Loki couldn't decide what would represent what. 

He was tired. 

"I tried to make myself fall in love with you," said Anthony, being, quite unexpectedly, not asleep. "But I didn't realise that I already was. I feel really bad about lying. I didn't want to do it, but you made me love you and... Fuck, am I quoting Berry Manilow? If you don't kill me, I'll do it myself. I'm never having pain-medicine again!"

For once Loki actually know what it was that Anthony was talking about. When he first arrived Darcy had taken a day to educate him in Midgard-music. Judging from what Anthony listened to in his workshop it was obvious why he was embarrassed over using this quote. 

Loki sighed and rose to his feet, he got a bit dizzy but it passed relatively quickly.

"Don't say that. Sit up."

"Why?"

"I want to sit next to you."

"You're so demanding," huffed the human and started to push and pull himself up to the side of the sofa. 

It was quite amusing to watch, but soon Anthony was sitting up and breathing hard. Loki sat down next to him about a hand-length apart. They looked at each other for a moment. The bruises around the human's eyes made him look so much more vulnerable. 

"So..." Anthony cleared his throat. "Was that thing you did really going to drive me insane?"

"Yes," Loki nodded. 

"Good thing Thor took the bullet for me then."

"Yes..." Loki looked down at his hands. "It would have pleased me in the beginning, but I would have regretted it with time."

It was a hard thing to confess, but it was true. Loki would have missed the sharp wit, and the way Anthony looked when he cared deeply about something.

"Would you have taken care of me?" Anthony leaned forward with a fishing tone in his voice. 

"That burden would have fallen to me, I guess," he shrugged. "It seems to be my lot here."

"Patron saint if the ill-abled and expectant mothers. I'm the first one by the way, not to get you confused."

Anthony laughed. Loki smiled, again.

"So..." Anthony scratched his neck. "What does this do for the Clarities? With Thor coming in the way? Are they rolling on or starting over?"

"I... I don't know,"

Loki hadn't thought of that. If they were every other then the next one would be emotional, but if they were starting over it would be intellectual. But who was to say it didn't start over the other way around and still be emotional? Why was this so complicated?

"Maybe you should lay off the spell for a while?" Anthony gave him a smile. "Sure it pushed my and Bruce's ideas about space flight forward like five years, but it really messed with our heads a bit too."

Loki just couldn't seem to get anything right. 

At that moment the elevator doors opened and Rogers, Banner, and Barton stepped out. Only Rogers seemed to look embarrassed. 

"Sorry," he said. "We thought you were up in Tony's room."

"Clearly not," said Loki, irritated over the sudden intrusion. 

"We'll be out of your hair in just a moment," Banner said as he opened the refrigerator and started unloading bottles and cans from it onto the counter for Rogers to put in two bags he had required from a drawer. 

"Keep on talking though," Barton walked past them to the bar and picked up a few of the bottles there. "Don't mind us. Pretend we're not here."

"What's going on?" frowned Anthony. 

"We're having a post-mission get-together downstairs," explained Rogers. "We bought lots of take out food on our way back from the docks. We were just going to get some beverages."

Anthony gasped and looked wildly around. 

"You're having a party?! Without me? That's not fair."

"It's not a party," said Banner. "Not buyout terms anyway."

"Man, look at you!" said Barton walking over holding three large bottles from the bar in his arms. "How many painkillers are you on?"

"Not enough for the hurt you're causing me."

"Dramatic much?" Barton laughed. "Patch it up with your little mad-ass boyfriend and you can come down for a donut if you want."

"You have donuts?! Loki, we gotta get down there!"

"Anthony," Loki was loosing a bit of his patience. "You are getting away from the point."

"You're so sweet." Anthony leaned his forehead against Loki's shoulder but then quickly pulled away. "Sorry."

Loki shrugged again, pulling the blanket tighter around himself. His shoulder prickled, but not entirely in an unpleasant way. He could see that Anthony really cared, it was probably why the lie had worked so well, and why it had hurt so much. 

Anthony was attracted to him, that was true even though it had been expressed as a lie. But then again the lie had been expressed by showing true feelings. Loki was making himself dizzy at the thought, and Anthony would probably go cross-eyed if explained to in this state. 

He glanced over to the other three men who were obviously stalling for the sake of eavesdropping. Again only Rogers seemed embarrassed, the other two were looking in with genuine interest. Loki turned back to Anthony. 

"I was going to train myself to tolerate your touch..." He took a breath and rubbed his shoulder. 

"That sounds horrible," Anthony protested, looking almost comically aghast. "I don't want you to tolerate me. And you can't train yourself, that sound even worse."

"I did so with my... my mother, and Thor a little."

"You got used to them," Anthony sounded far too serious for the ridiculous face he was sporting. "I want you to get used to me, but I rather you never get used to me than you forcing yourself into something."

This from a man who thought he could make himself fall in love. 

"Shit," said Barton, leaning his head on Rogers shoulder. "That was really sweet."

"You're not the one I'm trying to impress here, birdbrain," Anthony glared. 

Loki laughed.

Barton was right, it had been sweet, even though it had been said in a slightly slurred way. Anthony was slowly losing control over his consciousness. Loki beloved that he could be able to heal the bruises and the nose, but since he couldn't counteract the drug he didn't see the point. The human still deserved his punishment. 

"Can you forgive me?" 

Could he? Loki tilted his head. He realised that he was too attached for giving this up, but then again he was too hurt to let it go. 

"No. I will not forgive you," Loki hardened his voice and met Anthony's pathetic lazy gaze. "But thank you for asking me to."

"You're welcome?" 

The human's eyes were drifting away, lost in disappointment, confusion and chemical reactions. 

"Anthony, look at me," Loki snapped his fingers in front of the man's face to bring him back and turn to him. "Listen to me. I will most likely never have sex with you, but I will share your bed if you keep to your side. I will never be able to touch you like you want to be touched, but I will do my best if you never force me to, that will only end up bad for you. I will however be using this incident repeatedly in the future against you. If you can live with that, I'll stay with you."

The others shifted nervously. Anthony blinked slowly.

"I agree," he said. "But you really need to explain all that to me again when I sober up. All I can think of right now are donuts."

"Fine," Loki sighed, he wasn't going to get more out of the human tonight. "Let Banner help you downstairs." 

At the mention of his name Banner hurried forward. Before helping Anthony though, he made a quick examination of his eyes and pulse. 

"You really should go to bed."

"Donuts."

"Fine," Banner sighed and got his friend to stand up. "You can have a donut and then sleep on the sofa, we won't be able to disturb you soon anyway."

Loki got to his feet by his own strength even if it wasn't much of it left. He needed to get back to the machine. 

"By the way, babe," Anthony leered at Loki as they limped to the elevator. "What's your stance on voyeurism?"

Loki was amazed that the question hadn't come under sooner. He had no real interest in it, but wasn't opposed to it either. It could indeed be a way to keep Anthony happy, but also a good point for extortion and punishment. 

"It can be negotiated."

"Score!"

"I did not need to hear that," said Rogers.


	21. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short wrap up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank everyone for their lovely comments, they have really made my day whenever they arrived. Thank you so much!
> 
> I also appreciate the comments and notes about asexually. As I've said before I set out to write a Loki with my own feelings on the subject, and I feel good about this version of him. 
> 
> There will be a sequel that will further explore Tony's and Loki's relationship to each other and to the team. Hopefully it will start going up very soon.

\----

"So..." asked Tony about a week and a half later. "What did you guys think?"

Tony, Steve, Sam, and Clint had just returned from a mission where a giant lizard had rampaged the lower Manhattan area. It had turned out to be a failed experiment by a failed scientist who thought the lizard could be a distraction while he robbed his former employers. 

Spider-Man, who was the superhero friend that that reporter had asked them to meet, had already been there. The guy had preformed well. 

Steve had been less successful and had managed to be eaten. He was down being looked over by Kingsley who had more or less become the official Tower medic. 

"I like new Black Widow," said Clint and earned himself a hard pat on the back of the head from his girlfriend. 

"If Spider-Man is the new Black Widow..." she huffed "...then Falcon is the new Hawk."

"Woo-ho!" Sam Wilson cheered ironically from his seat by the window where he had more or less collapsed after returning from the mission. "But don't think that association means I'm hooking up with Spider-Man. Call me if Spider-Woman pops up."

"Speaking of boyfriends," Tony looked at his phone and the surveillance app that he had quite easily put together to monitor the Freeze-Machine. "It's time to go look at mine. He should be done about now."

The decision to put Loki under until he was completely healed had been made after Loki had assisted in Bucky's surgery and then collapsing straight afterwards. They knew that they couldn't go on like this. He needed one long undisturbed rest until he was well. 

The best news had come when JARVIS' calculations had found out that it wouldn't take months as they all had feared. 

It had still been a surprisingly lonely time for Tony, but it was much better than to let Loki go through the painful ups and downs of small recoveries and power-drainage. He had been slightly cheered up by Pepper returning a few days later, though with her new strict rules about separating business and personal life she wasn't much of a comfort. 

Tony had watched the surveillance recording of his and Loki's talk several times, mostly because he himself only had sketchy memories of the event, but also because it was a good talk. He was still very upset about quoting Barry Manilow. Especially since Clint had taken to humming 'Copacabana' and 'Mandy' from time to time. 

Thor had left for Asgard soon after and had yet to return. It was impossible to say what was keeping him, though they all guessed that the news of Jane's pregnancy wouldn't be the best news Odin could get. Also, with his new insights about Loki, Thor could be trying to do some diplomacy on his brother's part. Either way Jane was keeping close an eye on her equipment. 

Just as Tony was keeping a close eye on his, and today was the day Loki could be let out. They would have done it earlier, but the big lizard got in the way. 

He was joined in the elevator down to the Med-bay by Natasha, leaving the others to their rest and, hopefully, preparation of some food. Clint gave a little waive as the doors closed. 

 

The ride down was uneventful but Tony felt as nervous as if he was walking to the alter. Why was he the bride in this scenario?

They were silently greeted by Bucky who was waiting for Steve to finish his check over. Not that Steve needed any check over, but by unanimous decision all Avengers and associates were obliged to one, even Thor. This rule had mostly come by so that Tony and Clint wouldn't lie about injuries because of pride. 

"So," called Nat to Steve. "How does it feel like to be swallowed by a lizard?"

"Better than being pulled out from it's gut," Steve scratched his newly showed hair. 

"Got me a chance to test out that new laser," said Tony rubbing his slightly sweaty palms together. "And practice for any eventual c-sections in the future."

"You wish," huffed Nat placing her hand protectively over her stomach. 

"Let's not talk about it, ever again," Steve sighed. 

Tony laughed and walked over to the Freeze-Machine. It was covered in frost, he cleared the small window with the tips of his fingers. Loki's skin was somewhere between very pale and light blue. He was frosted over as well. There was sadly no ice-tap hanging from his nose like in the cartoons, but you can't have everything. 

Loki's thermal image was completely dark blue, except for his heart that was beating in bouts of light blue and green. All scans showed him healed and of normal blood status. At least as normal as they could guess that they should be. 

Tony had been down checking every day and was always amazed by the foreignness of it all. The readings were helping him in his research but it was now time to call it off. 

He licked his lips and started the sequence to turn the machine down. It would take a few minutes for Loki to wake up. Tony watched the screens as the numbers and graphs changed. 

"Where's Bruce?" he asked nervously. 

"He and Darcy are out walking the dog," Nat looked at her phone for confirmation. "They had to take a detour because of a big lizard corpse laying around."

"Shouldn't SHEILD be taking care of it?"

"Do you remember the part were SHEILD not longer officially exist?" she smirked. "That still applies. Don't worry, Hill has already sent them out under your name."

"Oh. Good. What else are they doing under my name? Invading countries? Buying illegal artefacts? Having covert pizza parties?"

"Probably," Nat shrugged. 

Tony made a mental note to look in to it. For the moment he was too excited to dwell on anything else than Loki. His greatest fear was that perhaps Loki had changed his mind during the recuperation 

They quietly watched the machine cooling down, or rather heating up.

"It never took this long for me," said Bucky. 

"That's because Hydra wanted to keep you confused," Tony adjusted some levels. "I've made some improvements. Hydra stole technology from my father to build this thing, my stuff is better."

"It was the best if its time," reminded Steve. 

"Well perhaps, but it's not its time anymore. Just look at you two, all new and improved. Speaking of which..."

Tony opened the lid of the machine and looked at Loki whose green eyes were slowly blinking open to meet his. 

"Hello babe."

"Infant," returned Loki with a smirk. 

 

THE END (for now)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There you have it. Sorry for skipping the confrontation with Thor, but it was too much for an epilogue. Rest assured it will come up in the sequel. 
> 
> Cliffhangers are starting to grow on me 


End file.
